Choi Iseul
"If only you did things like a good daughter would." My mom slurred out, throwing the empty glass bottle towards me. I barely managed to miss it as it hit the wall behind me.
It had gotten this way for the past few days. I didn't know what she had been going through at work, but she came back home being drunk out of her wits every single day, most of the times taking out her anger on me.
It was the first time where she caused any sort of physical harm to me, though.
At school, I barely escaped Jiyeon's grasp. And at home? My mom made sure that I regretted my existence every single day.
"I wish you never existed." She said one last time before turning towards her room, leaving me alone in the living room with a huge mess to clean.
With a sigh, I wiped my cheek which had a slight cut because of the glass shards.
That night wasn't going to be any better, I just knew.
***
School was just the usual for the next few days, dull and boring. I had to make up an excuse for the wounds on my body, which of course everyone believed.
Finally, for the first time in a while, something worth bringing a smile on my face happened.
"Iseul!" Seungmin greeted me with a wide smile. "Me, Hyunjin, Changbin and Chaeryeong are going to the arcade after school. Wanna join us?"
"I'd love to but-"
"No excuses, the food will be on me. You're coming and that's final." Changbin declared all of a sudden.
"This is why I love being friends with rich people." Chaeryeong giggled.
"You, my friend, look way too stressed these days." Hyunjin said, grabbing my shoulders. "Take a chill pill. Also, don't worry about the rest. They're a little mad about you not telling about your relationship-"
"We're not dating." Seungmin said, interrupting us. "So you all better stop leaving her out."
Changbin choked on his drink. "W-What? But we thought..."
"You guys were wrong, alright? We just grew closer as friends." Seungmin clarified.
"Oh god, but Jiyeon said she saw you too kissing-" Hyunjin began.
"She what?" Seungmin said with wide eyes. "Why would she say that?"
"So you guys didn't?" Chaeryeong was shocked.
"Um.. no." I mumbled, a relief washing over me as a single problem detangled itself.
"Man, she must've misunderstood or something." Chaeryeong pondered.
"Probably mistook someone else for us, considering that she's new here." Said Seungmin.
"Oh shit, it's almost time for class." Changbin suddenly interrupted as we were discussing the weird situation, which were much weirder to the others, not me. I knew Jiyeon and the lengths she could go to.
"Let's discuss this later, alright?"
"We better go, or Mr Jong will kill us." Hyunjin shuddered, earning a laugh from the rest.
"Why the sudden plan to go to the arcade though?" I questioned the drama queen.
"Um, well you see... You remember the assignment from the art club? I know you don't attend the club meetings that much, but the theme for this month was moments with friends. I just wanted to draw something related to that, and since you're basically family, I kinda thought you'd find it helpful too." Hyunjin beamed.
At that moment, my body just acted on its own as I pulled Hyunjin in a tight hug.
"You're literally the best friend I could ever ask for, Hyunjin." I mumbled.
"Glad to have you back, silly. You better stay close now." He chuckled.
Changbin and Chaeryeong cooed in the background while Seungmin just chuckled.
Just then, Yuna came towards us.
"Chaer? Class is about to start- oh." She halted in her steps as she eyed me hugging Hyunjin.
"Oops, I got busy with these idiots too much." Chaeryeong laughed as she bid us goodbye.
I didn't miss the way Yuna whispered the words 'now Hyunjin, huh' under her breath.
For some reason, it left me feeling a little weird. But as the day passed and excitement about the arcade grew, I soon forgot about it.
I couldn't wait for the school to end like usual, but that day for an entirely different reason.
***
"Iseul? You seem so out of it these days. Is everything good?" Lee Minji, my coworker asked.
"Huh? Yeah... Everything's fine." I unconsciously replied.
"Doesn't seem that way to me though," She said uncertainly. "I see scars on your face more often these days. You know you can always talk to me-"
"Minji. It's nothing, trust me." I said, my voice coming out a little harshly.
Minji seemed taken aback by the tone of my voice, so she stopped questioning me further.
"Um, if you say so."
"Also, I'm ending a little early today because my friends are dragging me somewhere." I informed her.
All of a sudden, she beamed at me, as if forgetting my previous rudeness.
"Really? I'll let Mrs Lee know! Have fun! I'm so glad you're hanging out." She smiled. I just let out a chuckle at her strange enthusiasm.
She was always like that, caring about me as if she had known me for years. It was cute.
After my shift ended, I walked towards my house, already planning my outfit for the day.
Day after day I was starting to feel more exhausted, barely having any energy at the end of the day. But that day, I didn't mind the tiredness.
I missed hanging out with everyone else without a care in the world. I missed laughing with them at Changbin and Hyunjin's silly jokes. I missed having heartfelt conversations with Felix. Finally, after so long, I wouldn't feel lonely anymore.
I missed Minho as well, his comforting presence, and the way he always seemed to just know when I needed help.
I didn't like being alone. It was too scary, too tiring.
I knew I'd talk to him some day, hopefully resolving anything that I did to upset him.
Somehow, Hyunjin's words from earlier gave me hope that I wasn't alone, because even after so many misunderstandings people cared about me. It was enough for me to completely forget about Jiyeon for once, who apparently didn't come to school that day.
However, I should've known how my fate tends to be.
As if on cue, a group of people blocked my way, some of the faces all too familiar.
"Oh my god, Jiyeon really didn't lie. This bitch is still the same." A girl's voice came, making the others laugh.
"Oh, Iseul. How much I've missed seeing you every week." A familiar voice came, making my whole body shiver.
No... I didn't want to fall into this life again... Why couldn't things go right for once?
A hand grabbed my hair, pulling me towards the dark street.
"Look at you, Choi. So fucking pathetic like usual." A guy sneered.
Someone pushed me from behind, making my body fall to the ground.
I knew what came next, and I also knew fighting back wouldn't get me anywhere. But despite that, I screamed and tried to free myself, hoping that atleast someone would hear my cries for help and save me from going through this hell all over again.
Even though I knew it was coming, I choked out a sob when a kick landed on my abdomen.
Another kick, this time on my back.
It just kept on coming, the girls pulled my hair harshly, throwing ice cold water on my face.
I could feel my body protest in pain, leaving me with no option but to just curl up in a ball as I took all the hits.
I was supposed to go have fun with the rest, then why did I have to end up here getting beaten until I couldn't move my body?
Just when I thought the sun would rise in my life again, a storm appeared all of a sudden, turning my entire world dark all over again. What did I ever do to deserve a life like this?
By the time they were satisfied, I was in no condition of being able to even lift myself up.
Maybe it would be better if I just died here on the streets.
Anything was better than this. This numbing pain. It was too much.
And before I realised, my eyes were already falling shut. Maybe this would be my fate. Dying alone on the streets and all beaten up, not even knowing what I ever did wrong.
I didn't even have the energy to cry anymore.
The arcade... It just felt like a distant dream now.
***
10k... GUYS 😭😭
Literally in tears rn, from publishing my first ff as a joke thinking absolutely no one would read it to hitting 10k within an year... I'm literally so proud rn. Thank you so so so much my loveliest readers. I love you guys, really. I'm literally sbdhdjjdjsjs
I hope you liked the 10k special even though it was quite depressing <3
Until next time! *Sniffle*