"Do you really have to go?" I whined as Blake gave me another small peck on the lips.
"You know I have to babe." I was currently stood on my tip toes with my arms draped securely around his neck and his resting comfortably on my waist. If it was my choice I'd hold him as close to me as possible and never let go but unfortunately it's not my choice. "This is my job."
"Don't remind me." Finally we stepped out of the car and walked hand in hand into the airport. We hadn't even fully made it inside of the building when the first photographers were taking pictures hoping to get the perfect snapshot for their stupid stories. "I swear the next pap I see will get a nice right hook to the jaw." I gritted out and Blake laughed at me, taking his hand from my grip and replacing it at the small of my back.
"Don't worry baby." I smiled at the small gesture trying to ignore the paparazzi. Why couldn't they go bother somebody else who is actually doing something worthy of being photographed? "I can't believe it's been seven months already." Neither could I. Blake had been in active service for four months instead of his original three planned and then had already completed his three month leave meaning he was now back on active service. This time was worse than last though. He was being stationed in Afghanistan where there had been a number of recent bombings on American military personnel. "Stop thinking so hard." He groaned when we reached the troop departure area.
"I can't help it." I took a seat on the floor with my back resting against the wall and looked over the troops who were fast asleep in their sleeping bags waiting for departure. It shocked me how many of them were alone and didn't have anybody to say goodbye to them. I suppose with a one in the morning flight it would be hard for people with children or maybes saying goodbye is just too difficult for them to do. "Promise me you'll stay safe for me?"
"I promise baby." I rested my head on his shoulder and closed my eyes trying to clear my brain of all the poisonous and horrid thoughts currently swimming around in there. I placed my hand into the pocket of my sweats and fiddled with its contents waiting until the time was right. "I'm scared." I admitted with a weak voice feeling his grip on me tighten. I don't think he had ever heard me admit out loud that I was scared and now I think I've worried him.
"I know." He breathed out. "I knew as soon as you were screaming out in your sleep last night. I knew when we got in the car and your breathing was shaky. I knew when you gripped Jordan's dog tags in your hand so tight your knuckles turned white. You don't have to be worried to admit you're scared." I turned and kissed him with as much force as I could not caring one bit about the other people or the camera flashes or even the fact I was running out of breath.
"I love you." I mumbled against his lips pressing them together once again. "So fucking much." Evetnually I pulled away for breath and felt my heart break as the speaker sounded.
'All military personnel prepare to board your flight. Fifteen minutes to wheels up. All military personnel prepare to board your flight. Fifteen minutes to wheels up.'
I stood to my feet along with Blake. Now was my opportunity. I took a deep breath to calm the nerves running wild through my body and the butterflies in my stomach. I had five minutes. No time to mess this up. "Blake." I whispered and he turned around again to face me with a confused look on his face.
I dropped to one knee and reached for the box in my pocket.
The smile on his face stretched from one ear to the other as I opened the box to reveal a ring.
"Blake Jackson McKenna. You've been my best friend through thick and thin, you've picked me up when I've fallen flat on my face and carried me when I didn't have the strength to face life anymore. You were the anchor that kept me grounded in my roughest of seas and the wind in my sails that kept me going. I know we're both young and stupid and god knows life with me is never going to be easy but we know we'll make it through this. I love you and I could never imagine my life without my best friend and lover right by my side. I'm not saying it'll be perfect and I'm definitely not saying that we won't struggle to keep our cool with each other sometimes but I am never giving up. Not on you and not on us. Will you please do me the honour of marrying me." His eyes were glassy with tears as he nodded and breathed out a quiet "yes" lifting me up to my feet to hug me tightly.
I slipped the ring onto his finger and he did the same to me with the other one that was in the box. "How did you know my ring size?" He asked admiring the small band on his ring finger.
"You're a really heavy sleeper when you're drunk." I laughed and hugged him tightly. "I meant what I said."
"What that we're young and stupid." He joked and I rolled my eyes.
"Out of everything I said that's what you took out of it." I faked hurt but ended up smiling anyways. "Well yes but not just that. You've seen me at my highest point and dragged me back up from my lowest. I don't know what I would have ever done without you and I don't know what I'm going to do without you over these next couple of months. I'm slowly fixing myself and I'm doing that because of you, no fuck that, I'm doing it for you. I love you." I kissed him again not wanting to pull away because I knew when I did I had to watch him walk away from me.
I got really light headed as we continued to kiss and reluctantly pulled away from him gripping his hand until finally having to let go as he walked out of my arms reach. I watched him walk away and it hurt a thousand times more than it did the last time and over a hundred times more than I ever thought it could. I then went to board my flight back to America constantly checking over my shoulder for him. It took me a full ten minutes to accept the fact he wasn't going to miraculously be stood by my side again and force myself to walk to the car and drive back to the hotel. I spent the entire day in Michael's room watching films with him while we cuddled and he allowed me to be silently upset with the world.
After six days I had finally gotten used to not having him on tour with us anymore. I had stopped searching for his face in the crowd every night and had stopped trying to cuddle into him in the middle of the night when he wasn't there. Now it was just a waiting game. I had one month left on tour and then I could go back home and start getting ready for Blake to come back to me. My phone started to ring at half two in the morning and I answered immediately recognising the number as a military number. This can only be bad news. I took a deep breath to calm down. "Hello." I spoke down the phone already getting out of bed and pulling on some clothes ready to deal with whatever had come up. Probably a broken leg or something and he's been allowed home on leave so I would need to go and pick him up. That's what I'm hoping for anyways.
"Hello is this McKenzie Leigh Murray?"
"Yes." I ran next door and knocked on Michael's door to wake him up and let him know where I was going so that he didn't go off it with me when he realised I wasn't there. He treats me like a child sometimes.
"We have you down as first to contact in the case of an emergency with Lieutenant Blake Jackson McKenna."
"Correct." I continued to pound on my brothers door before leaning on the wall as I heard him walking towards the door probably with frying pan in hand again. He always carries that damn frying pan when he's answering the door. I swear one of these days I'm going to throw an egg at him and tell him to fry it.
"He has had to be medevac'd. We have him at a hospital near you in America you need to come quick." The door opened and I didn't give Michael an opportunity to do anything as I grabbed him and dragged him as quick as I could behind me hearing the door slam shut behind us. They wouldn't have him at hospital just for a broken bone.
Shit!
"Where is he?"
"He's at Mercy hospital. You need to come quickly." I was already half way down the stairs by the time he had finished the sentence hanging up and dropping my phone quickly scrambling to pick it up as we finished racing down the rest of the twenty flights of stairs. I was too impatient to wait for the lift and honestly I didn't have the time to do it. Michael never questioned what we were doing or where we were going as I sped of to the hospital at nearly 200mph without a seatbelt on parking as close to the hospital as I could get and running inside. My safety wasn't exactly top of my priority list right now. I ran to the reception desk and tried to formulate a correct string of words that would make the sentence I wanted to say. "Med-evac. Lieutenant. Blake Jackson McKenna." I breathed out and the nurse looked at me with almost sympathetic eyes.
"Room 307 on the third floor." Great more stairs to run up. Thank god for endurance exercise. I allowed Micahel a breather and he would just have to catch up and I sprinted to Blakes room. I burst through the door and felt my heart shatter into a million pieces at the sight. He was lying helpless on a hospital bed still in his blood covered trousers and two bullet wounds to the chest as well as bomb shrapnel in wounds on his torso. There was a big gash on his head and I could hear the beep of all the monitors he was hooked up to. He wasn't even breathing for himself any more, they had him intubated and a machine was now breathing for him. I walked silently over to his bed and gripped his hand tightly in mine and I swear this time I'm never letting go. Not even over my own dead body will I let go of his hand.
I turned my head to look at Michael as he walked in and wrapped an arm around me in an attempt to comfort me but I was beyond consolation at this present moment in time.
I should have known this would happen.
I mean can happy ever after exist?
At 0125 on Monday the 28th June Blake Jackson McKenna died in front of my very eyes.
Please note that this is a re-write.
Okay guys so I decided I would update this today because I was really excited for this chapter. I love this and I hope you do to and don't hate me too much. Please vote and comment because I really want to know what you guys think. Love all you guys.