(TW!! Mentions of abuse and s/a!!)
"So, do you think they'll trust Cato?" Damien asks.
I groan quietly, "I don't fuckin' know. Maggie won't, I don't know about Daryl. I'm really trusting Rick on this one." I pause and think for a moment, "If Cato leaves I can't guarantee that I'd stay."
Damien nods understandingly, "Well, you know I'll follow you."
I was allowed to move Damien back to my house since his gunshot wasn't fatal and neither was his head injury.
I nod, "Thanks. But I have some pretty high...not hopes but- whatever."
Damien smirks, "Well, I never got to see his face because I was...you know...dying, but I'm trusting you that he's hot."
"Oh, just you wait. He's exactly your type."
Alyssa walks inside the house laughing with Carl. "Ah, the newlyweds." Damien smiles.
"Shut up." Alyssa giggles, walking into the kitchen and sitting on one of the stools. "Something's different." She notes, looking around as Carl sits next to her.
Damn it.
"Um...Daryl, uh, moved his stuff out like twenty minutes ago." I sigh, staring into my cup of coffee, watching my rippling reflection in the murky liquid.
Alyssa's smile falters, "Oh." She says, looking at Carl. Though, in typical Alyssa fashion, she smiles again to break up the tension, "Carl gave me a gift."
Carl rolls his eyes, "Alyssa." He groans.
"Sh! Look!" She hands me a small, forest-green box.
When I open it, a glittering, silver necklace with two interlinked hearts sits neatly. In each of the hearts, tiny diamonds reflect the light from above us.
"No shit!" I whisper, staring at it.
Damien smiles, "Carl, you hopeless romantic."
Carl scoffs and rolls his eyes, "When I was getting gas for our ambush I found it on a Walker. Cleaned it and polished it."
Alyssa giggles flusteredly, "For me."
Seeing Alyssa all giddy and happy is enough to make every single Walker drop dead out of guilt for taking so much away from her.
Carl nods, "For you."
Damien chuckles, "Better be my turn soon."
Alyssa smiles, "Well, Cato is um...auditioning for residency here so..." She wiggles her eyebrows and giggles, laying her head comfortably on Carl's shoulder.
At night, when the sky is coated with thick black paint and tiny white dots of outer space pricks the sky, Inejra and Alyssa run inside from star-watching.
Their faces are panicked and Alyssa is playing with her necklace nervously, looking for something to allow her hands to do. Inejra is sweating nervously and is picking at her nails, doing the same thing Alyssa is doing and trying to distract her hands
They don't say anything, they just leave the door wide open.
Damien and I look at each other confusedly before our eyes widen from realization as soon as we hear it, a loud familiar voice coming from something like a speaker.
"You may be wondering why the hell your lookouts didn't sound the alarm. See, we are polite. I mean, I don't know when they're gonna wake up from that kinda shot but they should wake up."
I leap from my spot on the couch and run to where I see Daryl, Rosita, and a few others gathering. "How did he get out?" I pant.
Daryl doesn't respond, he just stares at the walls.
Damn, was I that much of an asshole for breaking up with you?
Damien stands next to me and Alyssa and Inejra run and stand next to Carl, who is a few feet in front of me, as well as Michonne.
"So let's just cut through the cow shit- you lose. It's over. So you're gonna line up in front of your pretty little houses and you're gonna work up some apologies and then the person with the lamest one is gonna get killed. Then I kill Rick in front of everybody, and we move on. You have three- count 'em, three minutes to open this gate, or we start bombing the shit out of you."
Negan then ends his little speech with his familiar whistle.
High, low.
Alyssa looks at Carl with widened eyes, he hugs her quickly before turning to Michonne and saying something.
"What happened?" I ask Daryl and Rosita. "Y'all weren't here for hours and then the same day, the Saviors end up at our gates? What did you do?" My voice is full of warning, my eyes narrowed, and my body jittering with anticipation.
"We drove the truck into the Sanctuary to let the Walkers flood in." Rosita answers, looking at me and then at Daryl.
I run my fingers through my hair, "God fuckin' damn it!" I yell, spinning and staring at the metal walls protecting us from Negan.
Carl runs to the truck next to my little group and opens it. He then begins to smoke bombs into his beige bag as Negan continues whistling. "You need to make it look like we're escaping out back." Carl pants. "Get to the woods, half-way to the quarry, and cut the lights. Get enough of a lead on them, hit them, and get away on foot. You know where we'll be. Just have to get the guns, get everyone else here, and we'll meet you there." Carl closes his bag and turns just as Negan's voice sounds again.
"Two minutes, people! Dig deep. I want these apologies to be memorable. Bonus points for creativity. Work up a poem, sing a song. I love that shit."
"Get going." Carl orders Tobin and two other men. "There's gonna be people in the infirmary. They're gonna need your help." The three men comply and run off, doing as Carl says.
"Look, we got guns. We can fight them." Tara says quickly, approaching Carl.
"Yeah, they have explosives." I retort, approaching them.
Rosita nods to both me and Tara, "We will, but not now. Adrian and Carl are right."
"Carl," Michonne whispers. "We can't just let them have this place."
"We can." Carl replies. "All you need to do is survive tonight."
"All we need to do." Alyssa hisses, squeezing Carl's hand.
He nods, "We." He looks back at Michonne. "This is my show. You said it. This is my plan, and you're gonna do it. You're all gonna do it. So let's go!"
Alyssa blushes at Carl's lead and looks at Inejra, pretending to gasp for air.
Damien looks at me and chuckles as I roll my eyes and shake my head with a small smirk.
Alyssa kisses Carl quickly before running off with Damien, Rosita, Tara, Inejra, Daryl, and me. Carl runs the opposite way with a can of gasoline.
"One minute! One minute!" Negan announces.
All of us rush through Alexandria, our breaths intermingling with each other's.
"What's the plan?" Alyssa asks, breathing heavily.
"We get in the trucks and plow through them! Follow me!" Daryl says, throwing his crossbow in a construction truck. "There's only a few trucks, Rosita and Tara can ride with me."
I nod, "I'll take the rest. In!" I yell, practically leaping into a truck.
Damien and the other two pile in, Alyssa in the middle, and Damien on the passenger door side. Everyone else takes the smaller cars.
"You sure you can do this with your arm?" I ask, turning the truck on.
Damien scoffs, "Shut the fuck up."
I nod, "I'll take that as a...Cato." I pause, allowing my heart to drop. "Cato's still in the cell. Fuck."
"Adrian, you have to-" Inejra tries but I interrupt her.
"Damien, drive, I'll find y'all." I say, jumping out of the truck.
"What? No!" He yells, getting out of the truck and running up to me.
"Damien, you know you're not gonna convince me to stay. Get the fuck in there before my little sister and Inejra get blown into chunks!" I yell, beginning to run.
"Where you goin'?!" Daryl yells out the window.
"Cato!" I respond, not looking back and not slowing down.
Fuck! How could I forget about this until last minute?!
My heart pumps blood through my body at a rapid speed, causing a throbbing noise in my ears.
It feels like my feet can't take me fast enough, causing me to almost trip on my own toes. My breathing is quick and ragged and I feel sweat drip down my temple.
I stop down the steps and slam into the door, opening it with a bang. Cato jumps up at the sudden noise. "Woah, what's happening?"
"Saviors, they're here. They're gonna blow us up."
I search my pockets quickly for the keys but feel my jaw clench with anger. "Fuck!" I yell, remembering I gave them to Michonne after I don't feel the cold metal.
"Back up." I aim my pistol at the keyhole and shoot, breaking the lock and allowing the cell door to slowly creak open.
"C'mon!" I grab Cato's arm and pull him out of the cell, holding onto his wrist as I run up the steps.
Once we get upstairs and outside, I scan Alexandria quickly. "Fuck, all of the cars are gone. We can't go out the way the trucks did. Shit! Uh-"
"Adrian, pause." Cato puts both hands on my biceps and looks into my eyes. "There aren't bombs in Alexandria yet. Take a fuckin' second and breathe before you think of a bad plan."
I nod and inhale deeply through my nose, bringing enough oxygen into my brain to allow me to think clearly.
I quickly look back at Cato after scanning Alexandria, "The sewers."
He looks at me confusedly, "We hide there until it's done?"
"No! Alyssa told me about how she tried to leave with Maggie and Aaron through the sewers because it connects outside. If we get out there, we can escape without being seen."
Cato smiles, "Adrian fuckin' Walsh you are a prodigy, let's go!"
Just as he yells that, a loud bang sounds throughout the air, and hot air causes my hair to flow back. Orange towers of heat rise in the air, illuminating the night, twisting and turning, surrounded by thick, black smoke.
My blood runs cold and my body feels weightless, seeing my sister's home getting blown. Damien's and Inejra's home. The place that I called home before the Lineup happened.
"Oh fuck!" I screech, beginning to run with Cato.
"Damn it!" He yells, running the same pace as me.
Twenty feet away, a wall explodes, causing my feet to shake underneath me.
"We ain't got a warnin' when an explosion comes! Keep your eyes on the sky!" I order, glancing up and seeing several balls of fire fly over our heads before a few explosions shake the Earth again.
"Eye-eye, Southern Belle."
I don't even respond to his joke because when I try to, a large blast sends Cato and me flying back.
I groan as my head hits the road under me. "Fuck," I grunt, the world going blurry and spinning around me. I get up to my knees, struggling to keep my balance as the sounds of eruptions around me are muffled and tunneled.
"Adrian, Adrian!" Cato yells, his voice slowly becoming clearer. He struggles to his feet and grabs me, standing me up. "Are you okay? Can you walk?" He asks quickly.
I nod, "Yeah, let's go, we're sittin' ducks here!"
Cato nods and grabs me, picking up his pace again. His blonde hair wet with sweat at the suspense and heat from the fires.
By now, the air before us is clouded with smoke from the fires and the smoke bombs.
"It's over there!" I yell, trying to wave as much smoke out of my face as I can.
The explosions don't falter though I can hear a loud, metallic bang, my eyes just barely seeing through the smoke to see a truck parked where the gate should be, the rest of the Saviors surrounding it as Negan stands in front of them.
Nick is behind him.
"Oh, fuck." I whisper, my breath getting caught in my throat.
"Adrian, don't focus on him. Focus on us, alright? Focus on the sewer." Cato pleads.
I nod but just as I do, I see Nick look directly at me.
My whole body stiffens as I see his face flood with realization. Panic courses through my body so quickly I can't move, I can't speak, I just stare at him as he begins running towards Cato and me.
"Adrian? Adria-fuck. Run." Cato yells, pushing me to get me to run.
I'm in a full sprint now, deciding not to look over my shoulder because I know if I do, it'll slow me down.
Yes, I want to kill Nick. Yes, I want it to be as agonizing as possible. But we do not have enough time right now to focus on my traumas.
Though, as I'm leading Cato to the sewers, I realize something.
"Cato, run straight. The sewer is there in about thirty-five feet."
"What?" He asks, turning to me.
"We're leading Nick right there! Putting everyone else at risk! Go! I gotta-" I inhale sharply to calm my shaking nerves. "I gotta get him away from there."
"No, Adrian you don't-"
"Yes, I do! Go before you put everyone at risk! Stay down!"
Without waiting for a response, I turn on my heel and run right, making sure Nick can see me head that way and not see Cato.
"Adrian! Don't make this harder on yourself!" He yells, his voice deep and rumbly.
Adrian, don't be a pussy. Lead him away, don't worry about killing him, then go.
I'm focused too much on my thoughts that I stop focusing on Nick for a long enough time that I feel a heavy body tackle me to the ground, taking my breath so quick that I don't make a noise.
Nobody will hear or see you...or care if something happens.
Nick forcefully rolls my body over and punches me twice. "You bitch!" He screams, grabbing ahold of my throat.
I gasp for air, my hands desperately trying to grab ahold of his face but the lack of air to my brain causes me to not be able to focus on where my hands are going.
Black stars begin to prick my vision and I feel my skin tighten around my nose and mouth.
Focus, Adrian. Focus.
I close my eyes and gather as much strength as I have left to buck my hips up and kick, sending Nick flying over my head.
I gasp for air, feeling Alyssa's hands around my shoulders. "Breathe, Adrian, we got you, come on-"
"Get in the sewers," I whisper the last word, careful to not allow Nick to hear. My voice is raspy and my breathing is rough. "Let me finish this."
Damien pulls Alyssa away without any further hesitation, she yells quietly for me but I pay no mind to her.
Nick and I are both standing now, our bodies broad and our fists clenched.
"You knew it was comin'." I hiss. "You knew you wouldn't be able to get away with it."
Nick scoffs, "With what? Teachin' you how to act? Teachin' you how all guys treat their girlfriends?"
"No! Ruinin' me! Rapin' me! Beatin' me to the ground! Cuttin' my back with glass, puttin' your cigarettes out on my skin!" My lip quivers uncontrollably but I manage to keep a hard voice.
"I was seventeen! I skipped a grade so I could join nursing school! I wanted to move to Arizona with you! Have a family! But you switched! You twisted my brain you-you made me into something I'll never get back from!"
"You did this to yourself!" He yells.
"No! You did this to me! Because you wanted to prove to Carter that you were as good as him! But the truth is, you're not! You're worse! And god, I wish I could do so much worse to you than what I did to Carter but we don't have that kind of time, do we?"
Nick smirks and shakes his head, "No, we don't." I feel hot liquid slowly drip out of my nose now that I'm standing.
"I loved you..." I whisper. "And you took advantage of that! Now, you're gonna see what you fuckin' created!" With that, I leap onto Nick, tackling him and rolling with him as we roll a few feet.
Unfortunately, he lands on top of me. "You think you're better than me?!" He screams, his voice full of rage as he beats my face.
"I am better than you." I hiss, grabbing his shirt and pulling him down, climbing on top of him and slamming my fist so hard into his jaw I hear his jaw and my knuckles crack painfully.
I scream as my fists connect with his face, his eye and lip swelling, his ear, split lip, and both nostrils bleeding.
"You ruined me!" I scream, closing my eyes and pounding harder, savoring every pounding noise I hear.
I gasp as I feel something sharp stab into my stomach, causing hot, red blood to pour from my torso.
He smirks under me, as if not knowing he looks like shit right now. "Screw you bitch."
I shake my head, "No, you don't get the gratitude of killing me." I grab his hands and sit on them, making sure he can't move them.
Then, I painfully strip my shirt off, wincing at every movement. I wrap it tightly around my wound, hissing from pain as it causes my stomach to burn.
I put my thumbs right in between his collarbones, the soft part of his throat.
With a final thrust, I shove my nails and fingers through his skin, both of us screaming as I rip his throat open.
He gurgles for air, his mouth now a pool of blood. His throat now showcases everything, vocal cords, esophagus, everything.
I shove my hand into his throat and rip out his esophagus, blood squirting all over me as his screams become silent.
I stand up, struggling but allowing a full smile to creep over my mouth as I see Nick. Dead from drowning in his blood.
I grab my knife and shove it through his head, making sure he stays there for if we ever come back.
I stumble to the sewer, groaning in pain as my stab wound throbs.
Fuck, every three weeks I'm hurt.
Climbing down the ladder hurt like a mother fucker. I allowed myself a few small squeaks of agony while climbing.
When I jump down, everyone is down there, staring at me.
"Holy fuck, Adrian!" Damien yells, running up to me and hugging me tight, not giving a fuck if I hate physical touch.
"He's dead." I smile, breaking the hug and holding Damien by the shoulders. "Nick is dead. Nick's dead, Nick is fuckin' dead!"
"Holy shit!" Damien yells hugging me as I laugh excitedly.
I allow happy tears to stream down my cheeks, not caring if I'm slowly dying from a stab wound.
"You're covered in blood. You- shit, Adrian, you got stabbed?!" Damien exclaims, seeming like he didn't even notice I was just in a bra when I came down.
I nod, "I ripped his throat open, ripped his esophagus out, and let him drown in his blood." My eyes twinkle with excitement.
"Fuck, I knew you were a badass but when you said you were batshit fuckin' crazy, I didn't know you meant literally." Damien grunts as I allow my legs to give out and I fall into his arms.
The blood loss finally getting to my head. "Carl wants to see you." He whispers.
I nod exhaustedly and allow Damien to help me walk to the back of the sewers. The line of people sitting on both sides stare at me with wide eyes, in awe or fear, don't know. Couldn't give two fucks less.
At the end of the sewer, I see Alyssa sobbing next to Carl, laying her head on his shoulder. Inejra sits in front of him, crying as well.
There's a man, skinny and sweaty, sitting to the left of Carl. His black beard is bushy and overgrown and his hair is greasy.
When I look at Carl, he's pale and sweaty, a faint green tint pains his skin.
"Carl?" I drearily ask.
Carl smiles weakly, "Hey, Adri."
"What's going on?" I question, Damien helping me sit in front of Carl.
He's sitting on a cot, a small yellow lantern is illuminating his features and adding an eery glow.
Without a word, he lifts his shirt, revealing a Walker bit directly on his ribcage. The wound is red with blood, the surrounding skin pale and green, like his face.
My whole world stops. Everything around me goes silent for a second and I get tunnel vision, staring at his bite.
"No," I gasp, covering my mouth. "Oh, no, Carl. That's...that's some pretty fire special effects makeup skills you have because..." I have to swallow my throw-up.
The sounds of Alyssa's and Inejra's sobs, the sight of his bite, and the stinging in my wound are enough to cause me to hurl everything I've ever eaten.
"Carl," I whisper, my eyes tearing up.
He smiles sickly, his eyes teary and tired. "You're the best big sister I could have ever asked for, Adri. I know you..." He has to pause to breathe in more air, his mouth twitching into a concealed frown. "You think you haven't done a good job with Alyssa but...I don't think she could have grown up any better."
Alyssa cries harder, hiding her face in Carl's shoulder.
"No, no, no, no." I whisper, my sobs coming out quietly.
Damien then rests his hand on my shoulder, "Rick," He whispers.
I scoot back enough to allow Rick to stand where I was sitting, enough for him to see Carl. Inejra moves and sits next to me, Damien on the other side of me.
"I brought him here." Carl pants, noticing Rick staring at the man. "That's how it happened."
He then shows Rick his bite, making me cover my face and cry. I can feel Inejra's body trembling with each silent cry.
I've known Carl since he was born. I babysat him when both of our parents were working. He's been my little brother since he was alive. We drifted ever since things went all hell after the prison but, I never once stopped caring about him.
I never once thought he wasn't good enough for Alyssa and I never once would have allowed this to happen if I had a choice.
With each explosion, rocks break and pebbles and dust fall around us.
Rick begins to whisper to Carl, their voices too low for me to hear.
I manage to hear Rick as he speaks up, "It-it's them, they-they don't-It wasn't..." He stammers. Carl hands Michonne a bundle of letters, whispering something.
"No." Rick whispers.
"Dad, I got bit. I was bringing someone back. His name's Siddiq. We saw him at that gas station before..." Carl pauses. "It wasn't the Saviors. It just happened." He allows his words to soak into Michonne and Rick's brains before repeating, "I got bit."
Alyssa's cries are now cracked and quieter, her body slowly tiring out.
Carl kisses her on the head, "You look pretty in your necklace."
She just whimpers in response, still hiding her face.
Siddiq stands up, "Take my cot." He offers, motioning to the cot he was sitting on. "For Carl."
Rick turns and looks at him, his eyes wide and practically showcasing his broken heart.
He nods silently and Michonne helps him move the cot quietly,
Alyssa sniffs and moves, watching as Rick and Michonne help Carl lay on the cot, his breaths quick and weak.
"Is that better?" Michonne asks.
"Yeah, thanks." Carl pants.
"I, um, I got these." Siddiq speaks up again. "They're over-the-counter and non-steroidal anti-inflammatories. They'll, um...They'll help a little with the fever. They did for my mom and dad. Please take them." As he speaks, his voice begins to crack and break. "Your son...he should have them."
Michonne nods to Rick and Rick takes the medicine, "You're a doctor?"
"I was a resident...before. Yeah."
"Your name's Siddiq?" Rick asks.
"Yes." He confirms.
"Did you know he was a doctor? Is that why you brought him back?" Rick asks Carl.
Alyssa is now lying on her side with Carl on the cot. He had managed to work up enough strength to scoot over, patted the side of him, and allowed her to lay with him.
"He wasn't gonna make it alone. He needed us. That's why." Carl says.
Alyssa whimpers quietly, hiding her face in the crook of Carl's neck.
"He was the one at the gas station." Rick realizes.
An explosion sounds and dust falls directly onto Alyssa and Carl. Both Alyssa and Rick shield Carl but not quick enough.
He begins to cough and gag on the dust, wheezing with every cough.
"Water, give him water." Michonne says quickly.
I grab Damien's arm. "Damien, how badly am I bleeding?"
He looks down and his eyes widen, "Uh-not-not bad at all."
I groan weakly in pain, not responding. "I'm um...let's go see Cato, yeah?" He asks, helping me stand.
He drapes my arm over his neck and helps me stumble over to Cato. He whispers something in Cato's ear and his eyes widen. "Fuck, okay. C'mere." Damien hands me off to Cato and he lays me down on the damp, musty metal floor of the sewers.
I feel him lift my shirt off of my wound and then quickly put it back down. "Shit," He whispers.
"That bad?" I whisper, my body not able to work up any louder words.
Cato shakes his head, "No, not at all." He flashes me a fake smile before pausing and thinking.
"Stay here." He orders. He stands up and walks over to Damien and whispers something to him. Damien then relays the message to Michonne, Dwight, Tara, Rosita, and Daryl- the group quietly talking about moving to Hilltop for the night.
Everyone then looks at me, Michonne's eyes widening at my wound, my beaten and battered state, and the blood sprayed all over me.
I cough weakly and then groan in pain. "We don't have a lot of time." I hear Damien whisper to them.
"Sounds like they're lettin' up." Scott says, noticing the quietness outside.
"Damien," I whisper.
"Hey," He replies, crouching next to me.
"There's no way in fuck I'm makin' it."
"Adrian-" He tries but I interrupt him.
"You're my best friend." I whisper tearfully. This causes Damien's chin to tremble as he tries to hold in tears. "I'm so, so sorry for trying to kill you and I-" I cry weakly. "Fuck, I'm a horrible person but you have nothing to do with that."
Everyone is now listening, though, they're not saying anything.
Damien shakes his head, "Do not ever say that about yourself. And you are not dying, you hear me? Not for me, for Alyssa."
I cry harder though my body is making it difficult. "I can't, Damien. I can't." I look at the group, their faces blurry from my tears. "I'm so sorry. For turning my back on you guys, for thinking the Saviors were better than y'all. For-" My voice breaks and I sob. "For everything I've ever said or done." My voice is high-pitched and shaky.
"I know I'm barely a part of this group if even a part. But I would have protected y'all until my last, black-lunged breath." A few people chuckle weakly. "I'm not a good person, but I have-" My words get cut off with a groan. "I have tried to make up for it. But I know I never can.
"Adrian, no," Rosita whispers, crouching down next to me.
I shake my head, "I turned my back on Abraham," I cry harder. "I turned my back on Glenn...I'm so sorry."
Rosita cups my face. Though we were never close, we've talked a few times and know that we'll protect each other. "No, you didn't. And don't ever think differently. You are the strongest person I have ever met and I can't wait for you to laugh at yourself for thinking that you were gonna die when you wake up."
Tara turns to us, "Let's go."
I look at see Alyssa kiss Carl before turning and walking away with Inejra, still sobbing.
"Damien, I-" I bite my tongue to refrain from screaming in pain as he lifts me.
"You're surviving, Adrian. Shut the fuck up and let yourself live." He grunts, walking me down the sewers.
"Adrian?" Alyssa croaks, running to Damien and me when we're out of the sewers.
"Hey, dumbass." I whisper.
"Adrian, Adrian, no. Not you too. Not you too." She sobs.
I cry, "I love you," My voice is raspy and weak. "I love you Alyssa. And I wish I could take back all the trauma I caused you but-"
"Would you shut the fuck up about that?!" She cries out, walking next to Damien and me. "I have never loved anyone like I do you. Not Dad, not Carl, not Inejra. You. You have been through hell but...
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