Harry walked into the History of Magic classroom at exactly eight o'clock. He lit the lanterns with his wand and waited for Remus to get there. He had just left the Potions Club and, true to his word, Snape had partnered him with Malfoy. They had until the next week to come up with a potion to brew, write an essay on it that was no less than two feet, and brew it together at the next meeting.
Draco and Harry hadn't been the only ones to be paired up with a classmate from a different House either. Snape had made sure that everyone's partners were from a different House, which Harry wasn't so sure was a good idea. But besides a few grumbles, no one seemed to be too upset about it. Hermione had been paired with a Ravenclaw girl that Harry didn't know and Ron had teamed up with Ernie Macmillan. Even Neville, who Harry was surprised had even come, had a partner: Hannah Abbott. Harry really hoped that she could help Neville out so that he didn't mess up too much.
Only a few minutes after he had arrived, the door opened and Remus came inside carrying a large suitcase that he dropped heavily onto the floor beside Professor Binns' desk.
"Hello, Harry," Remus said brightly, "Hope you haven't been waiting long."
"No, I just got here." Harry pointed to the case. "What's that?"
"A boggart. I've been looking all over the castle for one and I finally found it in the filing cabinet in Mr. Filch's office. I thought this would be the next best thing to a real dementor."
Harry tried not to look too apprehensively at the case. After all, a boggart wouldn't be a real dementor, and that had to count for something.
"So," Remus said as he came to stand next to Harry and took out his wand. "The spell that I'm going to teach you, Harry, is highly advanced magic. Well above Ordinary Wizarding Level, so I don't want you to be discouraged if you don't get it immediately on your first try. Alright?"
Harry nodded. "What's it called?"
"The Patronus Charm. When done correctly, it conjures up a Patronus, which is a sort of guardian or protector from dementors. It's like everything that the dementors feed on: hope and happiness. But I'm very serious when I tell you that this is no easy charm to learn. I know some truly skilled wizards that cannot perform it."
"What does it look like?" Harry asked even as he took out his own wand from the pocket of his robes. "And how can it be a protection from the dementors if it's basically made of everything they want?"
"It can't feel despair, so the dementors can't hurt it. And it looks different for everyone. Patronuses are unique just like the wizard who conjures it. Which you can do," he went on quickly when Harry opened his mouth to ask another question, correctly guessing what he would ask, "with an incantation. But it will only work if you concentrate really hard, with everything you have, on a single, happy memory. The happiest one you've got."
Harry grew quiet as he tried to think of something that would be happy enough to drive away a dementor. There hadn't been a lot of really happy times in his life and he was afraid that he wouldn't have one strong enough. He finally settled on the first time he had ridden a broomstick, the way he felt so weightless, soaring higher and higher into the blue, cloudless sky.
"Okay," he said after a moment. "I've got one."
"Right, then," said Remus before clearing his throat. "The incantation is Expecto Patronum."
Harry repeated the spell a couple of times under his breath before he glanced back up at Remus and nodded.
"And you're concentrating hard?" Remus asked.
"Yes, I think so." Harry took a deep breath and moved into the center of the room. He thought hard about flying as he gripped his wand tightly.
Lupin reached for the clasp on the suitcase and pulled it open. A second later, a dementor floated up and out of the case. As it turned its hooded head towards Harry, the lights in the classroom went out and the room became eerily cold.
Harry lifted his wand and yelled, "Expecto patronum! Expecto pat—"
Harry couldn't think past the fog in his head. He could hear a man's voice. Someone was yelling, "Lily! Take Harry and run! Go!" Then all Harry could hear was laughter. High-pitched, cackling before the fog became too much and darkness engulfed him.
"Harry! Wake up, Harry..."
Harry opened his eyes, though it took enormous effort to do so, and saw Remus above him looking worried. Harry groaned as he looked past Remus and realized he was on the floor.
"I passed out?" He phrased it as a question even though he knew he had.
"Are you alright?" Harry nodded. "I think that's enough for now. You did really well."
Harry sat up. "No! No, I can do it." When Remus didn't look convinced, he tried again, "Please, Remus. I can do it."
Remus sighed and reached into a pocket of his robes and pulled out a Chocolate Frog. "Here, eat this before we try again."
Harry obediently took the chocolate and bit off a small piece. "I heard my dad that time," he said after a moment. "Telling my mum to run."
"I'm sorry," was all Remus could think to say.
"I'm ready," said Harry when he'd finished his chocolate.
Remus nodded. "Maybe think of a happier memory this time."
But Harry's next memory— one from last year when Gryffindor had won the house cup— didn't do the trick either. Harry awoke once more on the floor of the classroom. This time, Remus was less inclined to let him try again.
"I can do this, Remus, please. I've got to figure this out! What if the dementors come back onto the field during the match against Ravenclaw? I could fall off my broom again, or worse, we could lose the Quidditch Cup!"
"Harry, maybe—"
"One more go? I'm just not thinking of happy enough memories."
"Alright," said Remus, "but this is the last time. Whether you get it or not, we're stopping for the night after this one. Understood?"
Harry nodded eagerly. "Yes, sir."
Harry bit his lip as he tried to come up with a memory that would be happy enough to drive away the dementor. If quidditch hadn't done it, he wasn't sure what would.
Then, out of nowhere, it came to him. Harry smiled.
"I'm ready."
Remus moved back over to the case and on the count of three, he opened it. Just like before, the dementor rose up and turned to face Harry; its gruesome, rotting, hand reaching out for him. Harry concentrated with all his might, working hard to push the sounds of his Mother and Father out of his mind.
"Expecto patronum!" Harry yelled. "EXPECTO PATRONUM! EXPECTO PATRONUM!"
The screaming in Harry's head was still there, though now it seemed to be coming from far off. He watched as the dementor halted in front of him just as a huge, silvery...something came bursting from the end of his wand to stand between Harry and the dementor. Harry felt like he would pass out again, but somehow he was able to stay upright.
"Riddikulus!" Remus shouted and immediately the dementor along with Harry's patronus disappeared. Harry sat down and sighed. He was exhausted and yet he felt exhilarated at the same time. He watched as Remus forced the boggart back into the case; it had once again turned into a silvery orb.
"You're sure we can't have another go?" Harry asked. "I'm sure I can do better."
"No, Harry," Remus said, shaking his head. "You've had enough for tonight. Eat this." He offered Harry a large piece of Honeydukes chocolate before taking a seat in the desk next to Harry's. "Eat a lot, otherwise Severus and Madam Pomfrey will both be after me."
Harry nodded and took a bite.
"I'm quite proud of you, Harry. That must have been some memory you used."
"I think so," Harry replied. He didn't look up from his chocolate as he said, "It was from a few days after Christmas when Snape told me that didn't want to hide the guardianship anymore and that he was going to see if the Ministry would let him officially adopt me."
Remus smiled slightly. "I hope you know that even if the Ministry turns him down— which I don't think they will, but even still— it won't change anything. Not with any of us. As far as I'm concerned, you're already my nephew and I don't need some legal document to tell me that. Severus doesn't either."
Harry could feel his neck and face reddening and he looked away. "Do you think," he whispered after a moment, "that my dad would be okay with it? I know that he and Snape didn't get along at Hogwarts, but do you reckon he'd be mad at me... for loving Snape, too?"
Suddenly Remus was out of his chair and stooping down in front of Harry. He reached over and gently tapped Harry's chin to get him to look at him. "No," he said firmly. "It's true that James and Severus weren't friends, neither of them even tried to be friends except to appease Lily, but we all knew it was forced. Then when Severus cut ties with her to be a spy, they never got another chance to make amends. I'm not even sure that they would have, to be honest. But one thing I know for absolute certain is that James would want you to be happy, no matter who that was with. He and your mum loved you more than anything in this world and if they couldn't be the ones to raise you, they would have just wanted you to be with someone who loved you just as much as they did."
"But what if—" Harry shook his head and looked away again, but Remus was having none of that and he tapped his chin again.
"You can tell me anything, cub." Harry bit his bottom lip and looked down at Remus with such sadness in his green eyes that Remus didn't think he could take it. "What is it, Harry?"
"Sometimes I think about... about calling him 'dad.' Is that wrong? I know that I already have a dad but I—"
Remus was already shaking his head as he smiled at him. "I don't think there's anything at all wrong with that. There's nothing wrong with anything you're feeling, Harry. Nothing." Remus took a deep breath as he thought over his next words. "Harry, James was one of my best mates. I loved him and your mum and I know that in a perfect world things would be different. You-Know-Who wouldn't have risen to power. Severus never would have become a spy. There would have been no betrayals or Death Eater attacks or friends being murdered or murderers. And James and Lily would have raised you and it would have been an absolute joy to watch you grow up, happy and healthy. But the fact of the matter is, this is not a perfect world and you lost out on something truly wonderful. James is your father, Harry, nothing will ever change that, but you don't really remember him, do you?"
Harry shook his head miserably and Remus could see that tears had pooled in his bright green eyes, though he was doing his best to hold them back. "You deserve to have someone who can be a parent to you. And though we may just be a—" Remus pursed his lips as he struggled to find the right word— "a mismatched, sort of put-together kind of family, we are all still a family. You'll find, Harry, that oftentimes the family you choose can have just as strong a bond as the family you're born into. Now, it is your choice and yours alone to decide what you want to call him. It's absolutely fine if you don't, but if you choose to call Severus 'dad' then I can promise you that no one will say a word about it. And if they did, they'd have to answer to me," he added with a wink.
Harry nodded, though he still wasn't sure. "You call Professor Dumbledore 'dad,' right?"
"Most of the time, yes," Remus answered, feeling as if he knew where this was going and wanting to help ease Harry's mind on the subject. "And you know that Severus does as well, but it was different for him, I suppose. I know that he told you about his own father's abuse, and I think that made it slightly easier to look at someone else as a father figure. My father passed away during fifth year and he had never been anything but good to me. I'm rather ashamed to say that I was possibly the least well behaved that I had ever been after finding out that they wanted to adopt me."
"Why?" Harry's brows knit in confusion as he studied Remus, who by now had retaken his seat in the desk next to his.
Remus sighed. "I think because I felt like it would be a betrayal to my parents and their memory to get close to anyone else. I couldn't see that Albus and Minerva didn't want to take their place, they just wanted to give me my own place with them."
"I understand that," Harry replied, busying himself by picking at the edge of the desk with his fingernail. "How long did it take you? To realize that they cared about you and stuff?"
"A while, to be honest. I reckon I was a little ways into sixth year before I started referring to them as Mum and Dad. That first few months and then the summer after fifth year were...difficult. Besides fighting with Severus a lot back then, I simply didn't want to give them a chance. I didn't want to like them. So I got into more and more trouble thinking that eventually, they would get tired of it and send me to an orphanage."
"You wanted to go to the orphanage?"
Remus laughed. "Merlin, no! But I didn't want them to know that. I suppose I was really just testing them." He took a long look at Harry and said, "And I don't advise doing that, either. Save yourself a lot of trouble and realize quickly that Severus, and all of us, care about you and nothing you could ever do is going to change that." Harry grinned and Remus stood up, "Alright, cub. That's well and truly enough for tonight. It's nearing curfew and you should be getting to bed soon."
"Aw, Remus—"
"None of that," Remus said as he motioned for Harry to stand as well. "Do I need to walk you to your dormitory, or can I trust that you'll go straight there?"
"You can trust me," Harry said, offended that his favorite professor would doubt him. Before he opened the door to the classroom though, Harry turned back to ask, "You're not going to tell him, are you? About how I've been thinking of calling him something else?"
Remus held up his right hand with a grin. "You have my word."
Harry smiled. "Night, Remus."
"Goodnight, cub."
***
"So how did he do tonight?" Severus asked Remus much later that evening as they sat together having a glass of Firewhiskey each in Severus's quarters. Or rather, Snape drank one glass while Remus was currently nursing his third. Neither of the men were particularly heavy drinkers, and Remus was even less so than Severus, but his mind seemed to be elsewhere tonight as he stared off at some point near the edge of the coffee table in front of them. "Remus?"
"Hm?" Remus glanced up to see Severus watching him with his eyebrows raised nearly into his hairline. "What'd you say?"
"I asked how the Patronus lesson went tonight."
"Oh, fine. Better than fine, actually. Harry did really well. He even managed an incorporeal patronus on his third try."
"Impressive," said Severus. "He's definitely got talent, that's for sure."
"He's a natural," Remus agreed, though mentally he added, "Just like James."
"I suppose I don't even need to ask if you gave him lots of chocolate."
Remus smirked. "Now what kind of uncle would I be if I didn't hype him up on sugar right before bed?"
"Merlin, he'll never sleep tonight."
"Go easy on him, Sev. He's got you first thing in the morning."
Severus huffed and took a drink from his glass. "I'm not about to go soft on the boy, Remus. That's what he has you for."
Remus went quiet after that and Severus watched him out of the corner of his eye, searching for any clues that would help him to understand what was wrong with his brother. He looked alright, if still a little pale and tired from the effects of the last full moon which had been barely a week ago.
"Remus?" Severus said after another quiet moment. "What are you thinking about?"
Remus looked up and shook his head before the barest trace of a smile flashed across his face. "I'm still that easy to read?" Severus didn't say anything and Remus went on, "Oh, just everything, I suppose. Talking with Harry never fails to make me miss them." He picked up his glass from where he'd been holding it on the arm of his chair and downed the last of it.
Severus reached over and gently took it from him. "No more of that for you," he murmured. "You've got classes in the morning as well."
Remus didn't argue as Severus took his glass away, but he did turn slightly in his seat so that he could see him without having to turn his head. "I don't think I'm going to teach next year."
This caught Severus by surprise and he suddenly looked over at Remus as if he'd just sprouted an extra head. "What?"
"You know I never wanted to really teach to begin with. Not that I don't like it now that I've done it, but I think I want to do something else."
"You're not leaving again, are you?" Severus tried not to let his worry show through at the prospect of Remus taking off again.
"No," Remus answered quickly. "I couldn't anyway, even if I wanted to. Not now that I'm back. No, I was talking with Harry tonight—" he shook his head when Snape started to interrupt— "I'm not telling you so don't even ask. Anyway, we were talking and I remembered how much I enjoyed just talking with people and helping them. I think I might like to go back to just being a counsellor. Though not at St. Mungo's; that was a disaster and I hated every moment of it. But what if I focused on child counselling here? Merlin knows a lot of these kids could use one. I wouldn't even have to move out since I never moved into the Defense teacher's quarters in the first place." Remus had his own quarters on the fourth floor, near the back of the castle and he had seen no reason to leave them just because he'd taken the Defense post this year.
Severus nodded, hiding a sigh of relief behind his own glass as he finished the last of it. "I think that would be a good idea, Remus. Have you talked to Dad about it?"
"Not yet. You don't think he'd be against it, do you?"
"Not at all. You should bring it up soon though so that he can start looking for your replacement."
Remus nodded. "I'll talk to him tomorrow." He stood up then, a bit unsteadily and Severus watched him amble towards the door. "I'm going to bed."
"Maybe you should take the floo," Severus said before thinking better of it. "No, you'd probably get off at the wrong fireplace."
"Bugger off, Severus," Remus said grouchily. "I'm fine and you know it."
Severus smirked. "Don't expect me to teach your class tomorrow, Remus."
Remus didn't answer him as he walked out of the parlor door.