At blue base, Tucker and Caboose are talking on the upper level.
Tucker: Man, Caboose. You were asleep for a long time. What were you dreaming about?
Caboose: Oh, nothing. I do not like to dream. I try not to think while I'm sleeping.
Tucker: That's pretty much how you function while you're awake, too.
Caboose: I think consistency is important.
The camera changes to show Church, V, and Lillith.
Church: Well, you look ok. Then again, that's just the armor. How do you feel?
Caboose: Great! ...Who're you?
Church: What?
V: Oh I killed his mental image of you. So now he doesn't remember you.
Caboose: Oh, of course! I remember him... you're Marvin!
Church: I'm Church!
Caboose: I think I would remember a name that ridiculous. Nope, you are definitely Phil.
Church: You killed me with the tank.
Caboose: Dave!
Church: You insulted my girlfriend. You called her a cow.
Caboose: Karen!
V: That's a girl name.
Tucker: Dude, he called her a slut.
Lillith: You kill team members mainly Church.
Caboose: Phineas?
Church: Your whole life is based around pleasing me.
Caboose: Wally.
Church: In fact, I think you're kind of obsessed with being my best friend.
V: I don't why he wants that. Your a asshole.
Church: Up yours.
V: Bite me!
Caboose: Milo?
Caboose turns around and whispers to Tucker, but it is loud enough that Church can hear.
Caboose: Psst. The new guy is pretty full of himself.
Church: New guy? What the- I'm not the new guy. You're the new guy!
Tucker: I don't know. I kinda like it. I could get used to calling you Rookie.
Lillith: Me too.
Church: Oh, yea? Could you get used to me beating you to death?
Lillith: You know Luz would kill you if you did that.
Church: Now I know not to do that.
Caboose, again, turns to Tucker.
Caboose: Psst. What's wrong with the rookie? He seems mad.
Church: Oh, son of a bitch.
Caboose: Susan?
The camera then switches to red base, where Donut is attempting to jump onto the upper level, with Grif and Amity watching over him from above. Donut is making grunting noises as he jumps.
Grif: Donut, there is no way you can jump that high.
Donut pauses for a second after he lands.
Donut: Yes I can.
Donut continues jumping, chanting "Yes I can!" as he jumps. Simmons walks up to Grif.
Amity: Come on just give us the 20 bucks.
Simmons: What the hell is he doing?
Grif: Losing a bet.
Amity: Big time.
Donut lands back on the lower floor.
Donut: Oh, I almost got it that time! Are you sweating yet, sucker?
Amity: No because your not getting even close get up here.
Grif: No, I can't sweat. Simmons' stupid sweat glands don't even work right.
Simmons: What? They were working when I gave them to you.
Grif: Please. I'm not moist in any of the usual places. If you want them back so bad, take 'em.
Simmons sighs.
Simmons: I can't. Sarge says that sweat makes my cyborg parts rusty. So, I'm cooled by Freon now.
Amity: I still can't believe we could had a ac unit in your armor.
Grif: Ah, delicious Freon.
Grif starts to cough violently.
Simmons: Grif, are you alright? Are my lungs ok? Hey, wait a minute. Are you smoking inside your helmet again?
Grif: What? No!
Grif blows out smoke from his helmet as he turns away from Simmons.
Amity: Wait you smoke?
Grif: Yeah why?
Amity: I just never see you as a smoker.
Simmons: Dammit. I knew this would happen. And how many snack cakes have you had today?
Grif: None.
Simmons: ...
Grif: Ok, five... or more.
Donut grunts in the background.
Amity: He had baker's dozen at most.
Simmons: Dose he even know how many are in a baker's dozen?
Grif: By my count?
Donut, again, grunts in the background.
Grif: Forty-eight.
Simmons: Alright. That's it. No more smoking, no more drinking, and no more overeating, chubby! You're not going to ruin my body parts the same way you ruined yours.
Grif: That's ok. I can think of different ways to ruin them.
Amity: Now I'm curious how you would do that.
A loud noise comes from where Donut was.
Donut: Ah! Ah! Ow! Ahhhhh! Who left the spleen ball where someone could trip on it? I think I broke something. Simmons, I need your ovaries!
Amity: No you don't!
Simmons: Ugh, I really hate this army.
Sarge arrives.
Sarge: Grif; Simmons 2.0, Amity! I just got off the horn to Command. I'm afraid we have a situation.
Simmons: Ah, don't tell me they canceled the holiday party again! Those cheap bastards. All I wanted was one night of care-free dancing. But no! I ask you when it will be Simmons' turn? When?!
Amity: Oh come on! I just want to go to a party get hammered and then wake up in bed with a random hookup!
Grif and Sarge turn to look at each other before continuing.
Sarge: Uh, actually, the problem is with Lopez.
Amity: Oh well. Pretend I didn't say that.
Grif: Don't tell me. The Consulate General from Spanish Land is coming, and without Lopez, we don't have anyone to translate.
Simmons: There's no such thing as Spanish Land, you retard.
Grif: Yes there is. They have those, uh... uh, waterslides. And all that salsa!
Amity: That sounds like fun.
Simmons: No, they don't.
Grif: Well, I guess you would know.
Simmons: What's that supposed to mean? For the last time, I'm Dutch-Irish!
Grif: Hey, don't let your fiery Latin temper get out of control. I was just trying to make a point.
Sarge: Can it, Frankenstein. We've got a pot on the front burner, and it's a-boilin' over. I've just learned that Command implanted Lopez with secret instructions detailing the next phase of our operations. Do you have any idea what this means?
Grif: I uh... uh, Simmons? You want to take this one?
Simmons: Were you not listening again? What the hell were you thinking about?
Grif: Certainly not waterslides, I can tell you that much. Or salsa.
Sarge: What it means is that if we don't get back Lopez before the Blues uncover our secret plans, we'll be up pooper creek without a paddle.
Grif: Ew. Gi-a... that's gross!
Amity: What the fuck.
Sarge: I'm talking about being lost in a forest of filth without a compass. Swimmin' in a river of sick with no floaties on. Drivin' blind, in to the tunnel of-
Amity: Shut up! We get it! Fuck that was gross!
Sarge: You sure? I could go on.
Grif: I'm sure you could. But no. Really.
Sarge: Just one more?
Grif: Stop.
Sarge: Come on, they're fun. Simmons, you try one. I'll start you off. Flyin' by the seat of your blank, with a blank in the blank. Eh?
The screen fades black.
Simmons: Sorry sir, I'm not good at word games.
Sarge: Ah, you're both a couple lousy blanks.
Amity: So what's the plan on getting Lopez back.