A/n: I love making Remus evil💀😭
For @EmilyJohnston328 thank you so much! 🥰🥰🥰
When Janus ran through the house giggling evilly to himself, everybody was immediately suspicious. Virgil watched as he ran to the front door, opening and slamming it behind him.
Virgil gave Remus, who was sitting next to the window a questioning look. Remus just shrugged and peeked out the window to see that Janus had the car keys in his hand and was obviously about to get inside and back out of the driveway.
"Um. Okay" Virgil said, squinting his eyes from where he was beside Remus, having walked over to investigate himself, "that was really weird and i'm, like, kind of afraid right now."
"He totally did something" Roman groaned from the other side of the living room.
Logan sighed, "well, he's gone now so I suppose that it doesn't matter. Nothing seems out of place, so whatever he did couldn't have been too bad" he turned to Patton, who was helping him finish a puzzle. The piece was out of his arms reach, "Patton, can you—"
And Patton must've been off in daydream world, because as soon as his name was mentioned, he blinked and looked up, gasping, "nope! Gotta pee!" He was on his feet in an instant, dashing off to the bathroom.
Virgil rolled his eyes and chuckled. Classic Patton. He could literally be in the process of wetting his pants, and he would never notice until someone brought it to his attention.
"Uh, guys?!" Patton called after a few moments, "the bathroom door is locked!"
"What?!" Roman cried, rushing into the hallway with Patton. The others followed quickly behind.
Logan flicked the light on, and noticed a small sticky note on the door. He grabbed it and read it aloud, " 'I locked the bathroom doors and took the keys. Revenge for the cup incident' and then he drew seven angry faces."
"I guess we know what Janus was giggling about now" Virgil snorted, "lame revenge if you ask me."
"He's still mad about the cup incident??" Roman asked in shock, "that was like, three weeks ago, he needs to get over it!"
"Roman, you literally trapped him in his bedroom one morning, probably three thousand cups throughout his bedroom and the hallway filled with water" Virgil deadpanned.
"It was funny" he argued.
"I mean, yeah, but you knew it wouldn't just be annoying, obviously he would have to pee when he woke up. You humiliated him, he literally pissed himself" Virgil retorted.
"Why are we being punished for what Roman did?!" Patton groaned, "I gotta peeeeeeee!" He whined.
"Right. Okay, Patton you come with me" Virgil said, taking Patton's hand before turning to everyone else, "i'm going to take Patton to go potty, the rest of you can start grilling Janus in the group chat, 'kay?"
He didn't wait for a response before dragging Patton to the kitchen. He grabbed a water bottle from the fridge, chugged it, then handed the emoty bottle to Patton, "you can go in this" he said.
"Okay, thanks!" Patton chirped, not even waiting for Virgil to leave the room before he was tugging his pants down.
Virgil just snorted and left, being far too used to Patton having no shame.
He walked back to the living room to find that everyone was there.
"We'll have to use bottles or go outside until we can convince Janus to come back" Virgil told them, "has he responded?"
"Ugh, no. He's seeing them but he's ignoring us" Remus said, frustration clear in his voice.
Roman just sat on the couch quietly, not adding any input. He didn't have to pee yet, but he had two coffees and a bottle of water, so it was only a matter of time before he did, and he was way too shy to go in a bottle, he knew that.
He didn't say anything about it to the others though, not too keen on getting teased about it.
He sat on the couch for fifteen minutes, before hearing some rustling. He glanced up from his phone for a second, before doing a double take and looking up in horror as Virgil pulled himself out and aimed towards the bottle.
"Virgil! Have you no shame?!" Roman exclaimed dramatically, flailing his hands around at the speed of light.
Virgil rolled his eyes, "You can not be serious right now. You're twins with Remus, dude" he jabbed his thumb in the direction of him, "this can not be the weirdest thing you've ever seen."
Roman blushed furiously, and snapped his head back down to his phone. He heard a distinct lack of piss hitting plastic though, so glanced back up(averting his eyes from Virgil's crotch)to see what was going on.
"I'll time it" Logan said.
"Time what?" Roman asked.
"The piss race" Remus said, taking himself out of his pants.
"Yeah, you're taking forever to unzip. Do you need some help?" Virgil teased.
"Oh my go—stop flirting with my brother!" Roman shrieked.
"I certainly don't mind" Remus smirked, giving Virgil heart eyes.
No, literally. He pulled heart eyes out of his pocket, Remus, what the fu—
"Why do you two even do that?! You don't even like each other!" Roman cried, making gagging noises.
Remus and Virgil smirked at each other. It was kind of a running joke in their friend group that they flirted with each other to piss Roman off. Virgil wasn't so sure it was a joke anymore—he didn't even think he wanted it to be a joke anymore, but neither of them were man enough to confess their feelings.
"Because he's smoking hot" Virgil finally answered, "now hush Romano, Logan start the timer in three, two—one!"
Roman didn't want to have any part pf the piss race, he didn't even want to watch, but when he heard one stream trickle off and fade away while the other one was still going hard, he glanced up again to see Remus pumping a fist in the air, "yes!"
"No fair!" Virgil groaned, "I drank like—a whole bottle of water earlier so Patton could pee in it!"
"Haha!" Remus taunted, "sounds like a bunch of excuses to me."
Virgil rolled his eyes and flipped Remus off, before finishing up and putting himself away.
Roman himself was starting to notice that he kind of had to go, but he had to stay subtle about his squirming so that he didn't get questioned.
He only succeeded for around an hour before Remus noticed his potty dance.
He watched Roman shift on the couch, noticing that he went from squirming to practically break dancing in less than fifteen minutes. But Remus didn't call him out immediately, he just watched Roman torture himself.
It was then that Remus remembered something about his dear brother—how shy he was about private matters such as peeing. Huh. Maybe Janus's form of revenge hadn't been lame. Maybe he knew that Roman was bladder shy and would rather sit there having to pee for hours on end then man up and use a bottle.
Remus thought it was genius—and then he had an idea. A twisted smile slowly grew on his lips as he plopped himself on the couch next to Roman. He was going to help Janus get his revenge.
"Roman's gotta pee~" Remus sung, drawing out the e for way too long.
Roman blushed, "I do not!"
"Then why have you been potty dancing for the past hour?" Remus teased. When he didn't receive an answer, only stunned silence, he continued, "too shy?"
"Will you just stop?!" Roman shouted. Everybody in the room's eyes were on him, and he felt his cheeks burning with embarrassment.
"Nope!" Remus chirped, smirking when Roman flinched away from him and his shirt rode up. His bladder was huge and bulging.
He was quick to jab Roman's bladder and press down firmly, before hopping up and running away cackling before his twin could retaliate.
Roman's eyes widened the moment Remus's hand brushed his bladder, gasping. He didn't even try to smack Remus away, he just buried his hands in between his legs and let out a yelp of surprise. He tensed every muscle in his body, but he knew that it wouldn't be able to save him now as a sharp leak spurted into his jeans.
Everybody else shouted in protest as well. Virgil grabbed Remus by the shoulder as he attempted to run away, and spun him around to face him, "Remus, why the hell would you do that?!"
But Roman couldn't hear the response. He couldn't hear anything else as his face flooded with humiliation and all the blood in his body rushed to his ears. He leaked again, longer this time. He bent at the waist and tensed his thighs to try and stop it, but found that it was no use.
He ripped his hands away from his thighs when he realized that his hands were becoming wet. He let out a shrill noise as his bladder finally gave in.
The liquid came out much too fast, and his jeans barely had any time to soak it all up before it pooled under his ass and soaked in the couch.
His eyes widened. The couch.
He gasped and was on his feet in an instant, blushing madly as he tried to finish up as quickly as possible. Everybody was silent as they watched, and Roman was sure that the only sound in the room was the loud hiss of his piss soaking into his jeans.
The stream tampered off into nothing eventually, and he just stood there, completely shocked and thoroughly soaked, and he hadn't even realized he had tears streaming down his cheeks until a sob tore out of his throat.
Patton was by his side in an instant, and Virgil had Remus clipped by the ears, dragging him to another room in the house to yell at him. Logan, knowing that he wasn't emotionally equipped to handle such situations, proclaimed that he was going to get some cleaning supplies.
"Roman, what happened?" Patton rushed out, placing a comforting hand on his shoulder.
Roman laughed out of shock as he tried to wipe his tears away, "isn't—isn't it obvious?!"
"No, Roman, I mean, why didn't you use a bottle?" Patton questioned gently.
"Ha!" They heard Remus's maniacal laughter from the back of the house, "didn't you know? Prince Prude can't piss in anything that isn't a toilet!" His voice was followed by a sharp smack, "OW! VIRGIL!"
Logan rolled his eyes as he entered the room again, "they really are like an old married couple sometimes."
"I—i'm so sorry, I just—I can't pee in bottles" Roman's face crumpled, "I've tried before, I just, can't relax? It's weird, i'm sorry."
"Bladder shy?" Logan supplied helpfully. Roman nodded, "don't worry about it. The couch can be cleaned—"
"Oh no!" Roman wailed, "I am so sorry about the couch! An—and the floor, and i'm still dripping, why can't I just be normal?!"
"Roman" Patton interrupted his ramblings, "you are perfectly normal, calm down, sweet pea" Roman's heart fluttered at the nickname, though he knew(and was perfectly fine with the fact) that it was purely platonic, "the couch can be cleaned. The floor can be cleaned" he booped Roman's nose, "and you can be cleaned."
"T—thanks, Pat" Roman said with a sniffle and a shy giggle.
"No problem!" He cheered, "now let's call Janus and tell him that if he doesn't get home right now he's paying all of our rent."
"Screw that" Virgil said, entering the room, gripping Remus's arm so tightly that everyone was sure it was the only thing holding it together, and that as soon as he let go it would fall off, "Janus and Remus can both pay our rent. Text Janus and tell him he has ten minutes to get here or i'll bust him up."
"Virgil! I thought you loved me!" Remus whined.
Virgil rolled his eyes, "I can love you and still give Roman his justice, dumbass."
"Roman totally deserved this after what he did to Janus!" Remus argued.
"I mean..." Virgil said carefully, looking towards Roman apologetically.
"He kinda did" Logan finished, shrugging, "but it still wasn't cool."
"Revenge is never the answer!" Patton agreed, nodding his head.
"Now, I didn't say that" Virgil countered.
A/n: This was a speed write because I like,,, just got home💀
Words: 2080