I love this chapter so much.. I'm going to throw myself into a ditch from second-hand embarrassment and cry. After you read this chapter, let me know if you want to join—there is enough room °3°
Sleep. Such a frivolous thing. 'Cause, who needs it?
I bought a couch that wrapped around the sunken living room, yet I only used five percent of it most of the time; tugged away in the corner, knees up, my arms wrapped around, and a blanket to cover me. My chin balanced on my knees as I watched Seoul by night. Tossing and turning in bed was something I hated, so I just sat here and waited for the sun to rise, or I got extremely lucky and fell asleep for a bit.
I had a thing for replaying my day over and over again. Like some fucking cow ruminating his vomit, or whatever nastiness they did.
This time it was Lee's words that had latched their teeth into my brain, making me rethink them every damn second.
He was an absolute know-it-all. But that wasn't the part that fueled my insomnia. It annoyed the crap out of me that he was right. Scarily-precise-right. I never fully considered that I needed Lee the way he described it a few hours ago. It was unintentionally from my side that I searched for a fight with him whenever he was within my fist's reach. Even if I lost afterward, the tension release was unexplainable. And while I'm at it; I slept on those days the best. That was even more fucked up.
I groaned, throwing my head back against the couch. I was so fucking tired, yet I lay here wide awake thinking of an asshole. Such a sweet paradox. Maybe I should call Yang... it has been a while.
With my phone above my head, still tilted toward the ceiling, I scrolled down through my contacts. Yang. He would most definitely be asleep. I mean, most people would at four in the morning when they have office hours. But he never had his phone on silent. I could wake him. He'll be annoyed. I'll give him something to shut him up. The usual banter.
My thumb hovered over Lee. I didn't realize I'd scrolled back up. I pressed on his information, seeing his photo pop up. It was spontaneously taken, one without forced smiles. He did smile though, showing his angular face in profile; with squinted eyes and a bulged cheek... the little mole. He looked pretty.
"Jesus, pull yourself together," I muttered to myself and the shadows casting over me and my living room. My home was an empty shell. There was nothing in here that screamed me. Just a bunch of creams, whites, and earthy colors thrown together into a modern-looking apartment. Straight out of a page from Residence Magazine. The only hint of me was my bedroom. And you know what the hilarious part was? Nobody ever had set foot into my apartment. And even if they did, they would straight-out laugh if they stumbled into my bedroom—because it was a side of me no one knew of. Not even my mother.
I didn't like to share those sides of myself. It was so much easier to be snippy, mean old Hwang to everyone. It was, after all, my dominant side. After kindergarten, it kind of stuck, and now the venom had spread into a permanent state.
🍋
I threw the phone on my couch and stood up. My hand rubbed lazily over my briefs-cladded crotch while I dragged myself toward the bathroom that was linked to my bedroom—maybe steam could help me get to sleep. Lowering the oxygen level to dazed.
A cat-like yawn escaped me when I stretched my arms above my head, then grabbed my towel off the heating rack. My underwear pooled at my feet, and with a flick of the wrist, three jets sprang on.
"Hmm..." Tensed muscles eased as soon as the hot water hit my shoulders. The air thickened around me, turning my head heavy. "Just what I needed." My forehead met the cold, tiled wall, arms propped next to my head. I stayed like that until the heat made my skin itch and turned it off.
Wrapped in a towel around my waist, I dripped to my living room to fetch my phone and went back to my bedroom to just try and sleep. Maybe if I felt the weight of my covers and the softness of my pillow it would trigger something. It was a dim hope.
My phone ended next to my pillow, my head on it, and my naked body half-tucked beneath the covers. One knee was pulled up to the side to give my hand easy access to touch myself; cupping, groping, and stroking. Calling Yang was crossed from my list, so it was back to old-fashioned handwork.
It didn't take long for my dick to react to the shower-warm hand giving the needed attention and hardened as a welcome.
"Yes," I breathed, feeling my skin tighten from the sensation it inflicted. "Fuck, yes."
Sloppy sounds followed the needy moans that desperately searched for that release, but most importantly, for that fucking sleep.
My cock lubricated itself, making my fist quicken over the slick steel. I arched into the squeeze I gave myself, shutting my eyes tighter when the pressure started to build.
"Come on." An airy growl escaped my parched lips, tasting the blood through the cracks when my tongue slid over it to wetten them. "Hm, yeah."
My thumb teased the slit; giving pressure, circling, rubbing. Inflicting a lower moan coming from deep within.
The bucking of my hips lost its rhythm, turning frantic and hopeless. I felt hopeless. Doing this in the hope of a few hours of sleep wasn't one of my proudest moments. Yet here I was, imagining my teasing hand to be someone else to make it less pathetic.
"Fuck!" My body shook, trying to accommodate the waves crashing through me, then limped back into the bunched sheets beneath me. The moans died off when my cum drizzled down my length, hot and sticky on my skin. A few shots of release ended between the ridges of my abs that expanded and retracted in deep movements.
A heavy arm helped my hand to reach the tissue box on my nightstand and pulled a few out so I could clean up the mess I'd made.
"Thank you." My voice cracked with heavy emotions I normally had buried away somewhere deep within me but now they seemed to have clawed their way to the surface after I felt the long-awaited sleepiness that came to get me. "Finally.." Then I sank away.
♛
When I parked my car beneath Hwang Group, Lee's car was gone. I figured as much because it was already past ten in the morning. My insomnia fucked with my natural clock and made me sleep in. So I rushed. No breakfast, wearing casual black and the biggest shades to hide the evidence of my troublesome night.
I fast-paced toward the elevator, jammed my thumb repeatedly on the highest number, and sent a lengthy prayer to whoever would listen to me until I reached my floor.
"Good morning, sir, Mr. Hwang awaits inside," was the first thing my secretary said before the elevator door was fully opened.
"Great.." Of course, no God would listen to the pleading coming from an asshole as big as I was. "Thank you, Miss Oh."
My father sat in one of the black leather chairs in a nook that was created in my office. He was a man who took good care of himself and didn't let himself be defined by his age. His shoulders were broad, with a straight back, and was smartly clothed. His grey-colored hair was neatly combed to the side and on his nose hung his reading glasses.
His eyes were trained on his tablet when he spoke, "You're late." From here, I could hear his wristwatch tick beneath the heavy, bothered sigh he made. Seconds later, the golden-rimmed glasses were thrown onto the Japanese, sleek-designed coffee table, and he finally looked up at me. "Is the family business a joke to you, boy?"
My head was slightly bowed as I made my way to my father who was at the beginning of the trail of his insult path. I knew by now that the questions he had didn't need actual answers. They were rhetorical—from my father's point of view—he just needed a scapegoat for his upcoming outburst. Most of the time his rage had nothing to do with what was happening at the moment.
"Your life is built on partying, alcohol, and whores. Ah, and don't forget that Lee kid—that's even more pathetic. Maybe I should cut off the limbs I gave you and you start swimming on your own. Earning money, power, comes with hard work and time, and all you seem to do with yours is fool around with our enemy's son.
"I've made a dinner appointment with Mr. Lim and his wife and daughter tonight because nothing promising is coming from you. Be home at seven—and for God's sake, wear something that masks your incompetence. I'm not warning you again!"
By the time he ended his vent, I gave him a glass of water to help him get his blood pressure down. The vein on the side of his neck bulged angrily and sweat wettened his hairline. The frown furrowing his greyed brows eased a bit as he took half of the glass in one go.
"I will, father."
"Good. Now, what about those numbers I gave you yesterday."
I rounded my desk to grab the papers and handed them over to him. I sat beside him with an ankle crossed over the knee and leaned in a bit toward him. "I have gone through them many times, but they make no sense at all. There is a huge gap here—" my finger tapped on a series of numbers," and I can't find out yet how and why."
My father grasped his glasses off the table so he could take a better look; the serious frown back on his forehead and the corners of his mouth angled down.
"To who are the supplies sent?"
"Kim.."
"—Keep an eye on them."
♛
When morning passed a few hours ago, my stomach got annoyed with my lack of interest in feeding it. Filling it with water wasn't doing it anymore, and by now the alcohol was flushed from my system.
Bring menu 3 from that new place around the corner of your company and see me in twenty.
I killed time by spinning my cell phone with its back over the desk. Until it buzzed.
I'm what..your busboy from now on? Is food all you can think of?
Yes. Right now I do.
Twenty minutes. Tic-toc.
♛
Without a knock or a voice, Lee entered my office after exactly twenty minutes, with the delicious smell tagging along. He placed my order on the coffee table and sat across from me. The baseball cap he was wearing to keep his identity unknown was placed beside him on another chair, and slumped down with spread legs. His eyes scanned my face thoroughly, and I wasn't sure what he tried to see or find out.
He wore a thin, cream turtleneck underneath a black button-up, paired with charcoal grey slacks and black dress shoes. He looked good. His styled hair was a little messy from the cap he wore.
"Hungry?" My thumb unintentionally dipped in some sauce and I quickly cleaned it by sucking it into my mouth. This was the first taste of breakfast for me which made me moan appreciative.
"Jesus," Lee growled under his breath. But I caught it anyway and it made me look up. Dilated pupils were zeroed in on the lower half of my face, not blinking once. A hand fisted his black slacks around his right thigh, turning white from the force he was using. My breath hitched from the sudden electric-charged energy building up between us—out of fucking nowhere.
My thumb popped free.
♛≪ Last Night ♛
🍋
The warmth that sleep provided me got suddenly terrorized by tiny holes that were forcefully drilled in. The cold reality seeped through until there was nothing more of that warmth left.
My eyes blinked open, coated with crusty sleep. I heard my phone buzz again on the nightstand. After the second buzz, I had my eyes closed again in tired frustration and swatted in search of the device.
"This better be good. Waking me up at the crack of dawn." A yawn rushed out, followed by stretching limbs.
"Yes."
My eyes shot back open. "Hwang?" His voice was faint, but I heard it nonetheless.
"Fuck, yes." There were soft sounds of rustling sheets and deep breaths. Was he fucking with me?
I quickly looked at the time on my screen and saw it was four in the fucking morning. Rising anger made me press my phone harder against my ear, ready to yell at him for being an asshole, but that red-hazed emotion disappeared into thin air when the connection got clearer.
It was wet. A quick wet sound I knew all too well. They were mixed with needy whimpers, and it was then everything fell into place. He was touching himself.
"Come on." The rumbling that came from Hwang's throat was sent directly to my core. Heat bubbled up, knowing now he was jerking off and was far gone, trying to chase his release. "Hm, yeah."
I wasn't sure if this fell under voyeurism, because I technically didn't see him but still, it felt like I was invading his privacy—and it turned me the fuck on. His neediness, the sloppy sounds, it made my blood rush down at a record speed. Sleep was long gone by now.
The rhythm he was holding along with his low moans, made me follow him. I hadn't even realized my hand was squeezing the life out of my erection until I heard my own strangled moan escape. This was so fucking wrong. But God, it felt so fucking good.
His face must have angled toward his phone at some point because his whimpers and short breaths felt like they were directly sent to my ear; like he was here beside me. And for a moment he wasn't the cocky, full-blown prick I knew for so long. The one I hated his guts with a passion. This guy was stripped from the many layers his mask was made of and he lay now bare in front of me.
My front teeth sunk into my bottom lip to keep myself quiet. I wanted to tell him things. A hot desire to praise him. To help him catch that high so we could crash down together. Because shit, I was so close.
"Fuck!" His breathing turned erratic, choked out. It was the final push that send me down that rabbit hole I tried so hard not to fall into. Because I knew I was screwed the moment I went down that dark path. But for now, I enjoyed my hot release that came out almost painfully. My toes curled around the sheets and my hands clawed into the mattress as I tried to catch my breath and ease my rabid heart.
A soft rustling.
"Thank you." My head snapped to the phone near my ear, thinking for a second Hwang was talking to me. His breathing was heavy and sleepy, so I kept quiet. Tentatively waiting for something that would tell me whether he knew or not. "Finally." A weird squeeze hit my chest. Deep, slow breaths instantly followed on the other side of the line.
Thirty minutes, that's how long I listened to him sleeping, knowing now for sure he had pocket-dialed me in some unknown way. Hwang's steady breathing was soothing, and before I got knocked out myself, I hung up.
♛
Early in the morning, I retrieved my car from Hwang Group's parking, not ready to face Hwang. I knew I would see him soon. We made a deal after all. Still, I hoped it would take longer than this. He texted me to bring food. Which I did, with lead-filled shoes, and entered his office.
Hwang sat in a black lounge chair, blending in with his same-colored casual fit. He looked up the moment I walked in with hungry eyes on the paper bag I was holding. The natural wave of his locks swayed softly as he followed my movement to take a seat on the other side of the table. He immediately dug into the bag, like a starving stray dog going through the trash.
But when that moan hit my ears while he sucked his thumb, I couldn't restrain myself anymore. "Jesus," I swore, getting attacked by the replayed sounds he made just a few hours ago. Seeing him now, with those brown, unknowing eyes looking back at me, with the sound of his suckling, I had to think very hard of something else. Anything else. Chan in tighty-whities.
"Something wrong?" Why the fuck did he sound so sincere? "Does the food smell bad? I can eat later if you want.." But the rumbling of his stomach told me otherwise, and it made me feel like a fucking dick.
"No—no, eat. It's not that." I squeezed my eyes shut and told myself that after three years of celibacy, it wasn't weird I was turned on by my enemy.
Pinterest has a lil update
☞ ☆