Later that night, Pyrrha mentioned to Shine that she'd met someone rather odd at the movies.
"Did she seem familiar?" Shine asked.
"It was too dark, but I felt like I'd seen her before," Pyrrha said. "Or maybe it was just that she was striking--I've hardly met anyone who seemed so intense in so few words...other than yourself."
"Me? Intense?" Shine said.
"Imagine that." Emerald put her pillow over her head. "Can you keep it down?... Ugh, I knew this was a bad idea."
"Love you too," Shine said dryly.
"Can you stop saying that?" Emerald seemed cross.
"Is something wrong?" Pyrrha asked.
"No. Why the h--- would anything be wrong?" Emerald snapped.
Shine hadn't heard of anything going on with Emerald that day, but then, she couldn't have eyes and ears everywhere.
"I just thought you seemed upset," Pyrrha said kindly. "I'm sorry."
"Why are you apologizing to me, you dumba--!" Emerald sat up to glare at her. "Just mind your own d--- business!"
Pyrrha looked taken aback.
Shine put a hand on her shoulder reassuringly, then said very calmly, "Emerald, you know that guilt is easier to live with when you own up to it. Try us."
"Huh?" Emerald said.
"Could it be that things being a little quieter has left way too much time to think?" Shine suggested. "You'd be happy Mercury is here finally, I'd think, but maybe that was a distraction also. And now it's not. But if there's something you need to say to Pyrrha, just say it. I promise she is a wise and kind listener, even if she has a bit of temper."
"Excuse me?" Pyrrha looked at Shine.
"It's okay," Shine said. "I have a lot of temper. I'm not one to talk."
"Yeah, you can talk plenty of smack with the others," Emerald said. "You know, Raven says that we shouldn't mess with you two because of your freaky powers."
"And I told you that's nonsense," Shine said. "You shouldn't mess with me because it's a bad idea, not because of my powers. Those come and go, but I'm afraid my personality is a permanent fixture of my life."
Pyrrha laughed at that.
[Put that on a t-shirt.]
"But seriously, Raven says that?" Shine said. "My, my, I would think... No, actually that makes sense. I suppose she'll get over it."
"You don't want that?" Pyrrha didn't expect much different.
"Not really," Shine said. "Only bad guys should be scared of us. And that more for Who we represent than who we are ourselves... Emerald, please, I want to help."
"Did I do something?" Pyrrha asked.
"No..." Emerald grumbled.
She hugged her pillow nervously and fidgeted.
"I just think it's weird how you keep acting like nothing happened at Beacon. Aren't you pissed at us for what we did?... I mean, you literally died."
"That wasn't your fault," Pyrrha said.
"What happened to Penny was," Emerald said.
There it was...
Pyrrha pursed her lips.
"I'm not totally oblivious," Emerald said, still very distant. "I've heard that s--- talking some of you have been doing. But the twig and you always stick up for us, like we ever did you any favors. But we didn't."
"Emerald is feeling more guilty because you haven't been vindictive," Shine translated for Pyrrha. "If that was unclear. She wants to know if you guys really forgive her, or if it's just an act."
Emerald wished Shine would stop reading her mind.
Pyrrha glanced at her like: "Is that right?"
When she didn't deny it, Pyrrha swallowed "I see...I suppose that would be confusing."
"It's all right to be honest." Shine leaned back on her own bed. "It's normal to have...feelings about it, Pyrrha. Don't sugarcoat it."
"I do tend to do that," Pyrrha admitted. "I never liked to admit if I had my feelings hurt by anyone. It was always hard for me to make friends. And no one ever thought I was afraid or vulnerable... Jaune used to worry about me. Until then, no one else ever thought I might have feelings."
"Perhaps we are often shallow about our idols," Shine said. "And foolish. I'm sorry. But there are rare exceptions to that. I'm glad you found one."
"But Jaune also taught me that other people can be like that, if someone just shows them that first," Pyrrha said. "Maybe I just had no idea how to act. Turns out I didn't get that pedestal treatment...but with anyone outside my group of friends, I still don't know what to expect. I'm...thankful that Emerald--uh, you, I mean (I shouldn't talk like you're not here)--have given some thought to what I might feel now."
Emerald thought that was a weird thing to be thankful for.
"But you're sorry now, right?" Pyrrha said.
"I mean...I'm not proud of it," was all Emerald could muster.
"And I'm not proud of many things I've done," Pyrrha said. "But no one has blamed me for them...except one person maybe, which maybe I deserve... I don't know why you did what you did, but I'm willing to consider that it's not always that clear cut. So, don't feel that you have to...feel ashamed around me. Is that what I needed to say?" She seemed confused.
Shine choked back a laugh at how awkward this was. She thought it might make it worse.
"You know, ladies, I'm not the most socially skilled person myself," she said, "but I can read people pretty well. If you don't mind the unconventional approach, maybe I can put this to rest."
"Please," Emerald said. "I hate dancing around stuff."
"Oh, anything to make this easier." Pyrrha put a hand to her forehead.
"I'm not sure my therapists would approve of my saying it," Shine said, "but screw that--it never worked that well anyway for me... I think it would be easier if you both just acknowledged that what Emerald did was abominable...but we all do things like that. Emerald, I'll be frank with you, you've not been a good person, but I'm under no illusion that I have been, or anyone else here has been. You might suck, but all of us do. The others are making you feel inferior to them, but like I told you, that's their problem. You have as much right to do the right thing as any other person in the world does. Do not ever let anyone tell you otherwise. And none of us know what's right when we start off, not even those of us who are taught right, because the Truth will always overturn our small, safe ideas of morality. Both of you can just leave your assumptions at the door. The worst thing you did was make Pyrrha do something that she'd never do. You did it for Cinder, blindly. The way all of them followed Ozpin blindly. I think, Pyrrha, you understand that, right?"
"I do," Pyrrha agreed readily. "I've thought so before."
"Then Pyrrha is honest enough to admit that we're all hypocrites," Shine said. "The fact is, neither Ozpin nor Salem are models of conduct here. Don't follow them. Both of you know that now, so thus far, to me, you're equal. You can try to make it different if you like, but it's your choice. There is no law in the universe that would actually compel you to be different."
"Can I ask," Pyrrha asked, "why me?" She looked grave. "Was it because of my Semblance... Was it planned from the start?"
"I... Once Cinder found it out, I think so," Emerald said. She looked at the floor. "I told myself it didn't matter. She was just a robot, right? And it was for Cinder, all of it. Like the rat we killed in the bookshop. It's not like... You know, people don't get knifed all the time in the streets. I guess I knew it was wrong to heroes or whatever, but it's not like we ever thought about that. Heck, Mercury is an assassin's son. You should hear what his dad--" She broke off. "Well, the point is, I thought you all were sentimental idiots. I still kind of think that about some of you frickers...but on the other hand, knowing who I was working for, I don't think I had the...right to do those things. Not if I'd known."
She paused. "Cinder always wanted to humiliate you because you were famous for being invincible... one thing about Cinder, she hates anyone who's famous for being strong. Atlas, Vale, the huntsmen academies, and your reputation put a target on your back from the start. It wasn't personal, like, you weren't a person to me or anyone else at the time. I didn't think about what it would do emotionally, it was a part of the plan, that's all. I mean, we wanted to scare the entire kingdom, so... But when I saw how bad it got later, I thought it was..."
"Sad," Shine filled in.
"Yeah." Emerald rubbed her arm. "Sad. I guess I just didn't have anything against those people personally. Why was I ruining their lives to prove a point? But you know Cinder... Bet that sounds pathetic, considering." She pulled her knees up suddenly and hugged them. She looked very small.
Pyrrha honestly didn't have anger after that. If she had, it passed as soon as she saw how bothered Emerald was.
Shine tilted her head. "Emerald, you don't know how to process those things," she said gently. "That's why you're angry... That's okay, though. We have to be taught how to feel things the right way. A lot of people don't know that, but it's true. You're confused and hurt, no doubt, that Cinder betrayed you. That's okay. You're allowed to feel that way even though you caused it. That's a sure sign that you're smarter than those poor, miserable fools who are still in this because they like it. I think you're blessed, in a way."
"What?" Emerald looked up.
"Jesus said, 'Blessed are the poor in spirit,'" Shine said, "'for theirs is the kingdom of heaven,' and, 'Blessed are the meek, for they shall see God.' You've never had much, good or bad, in your life, right? Most people think that makes you cursed, lower. But not in God's kingdom. To Him, that's a blessing, because if your cup is already empty, it can be filled. A full cup of ideas and pride and ideology that sounds right but leads to nothing, that's harder. You have to empty it out first. You bring very little to the table in terms of essentials, and that's good. No one is too poor for God."
"That's beautiful," Pyrrha said. "Really, it is. I never understood people who look down on others for their background or status... I think you just summed up why I liked Jaune's...effort. He started at the bottom also, but he tried so hard, and he learned faster, I think, because he had so little to start with."
"Huh?" Emerald said.
"Jaune faked his way into Beacon," Shine said. "Just like you did, come to think of it."
Pyrrha suddenly laughed. "I didn't think of it that way."
"S---, we're not the only posers." Emerald said that untactfully. "Get out."
"I wouldn't call him a poser..." Pyrrha said.
"Not now, but the first few weeks," Shine said, "I'd have to agree. But he's smart enough to snap out of it. That's my point. The rest doesn't matter. We're all fakers, liars, thieves, it doesn't matter who we are, but those of us who know we are, we can leave it faster. Now that we've heard your side of it, Emerald, there's nothing to worry about."
"I agree with her," Pyrrha said. "You were wrong, but that doesn't make it less right to change your mind. We can't start saying that things outweigh each other--we'll never stop. I see that now."
"The only thing that kills me," Emerald said in a low tone, "is that I believed Cinder. I was so stupid. I'm surprised Mercury isn't gloating more about it. He hasn't said a thing... But how is it everyone but me saw it?"
"But how did you ever come to work for her?" Pyrrha couldn't imagine Cinder winning anyone over.
Emerald closed her eyes. "I was a street rat," she said. "Cinder caught me stealing jewelry, using my Semblance. She was interested. I thought she was going to turn me in, but she didn't. She wanted to know how I did it. Then she said if I came with her, I'd never be hungry again... Before that I wasn't that good at deceptions--I just stole little things before I would lose focus--but she taught me how to work on it, how to read, you know, that type of stuff. I thought that's what people did, if they liked you. I guess I thought she was the closest thing I had to family. I just can't believe that was all fake."
"That's horrible," Pyrrha said. "I mean...that she'd go that far and then just...like it was nothing... What is wrong with that woman?"
"The hard truth is," Shine mused, "love is complicated, when it's not holy. Cinder Fall is easily one of the most selfish people I've met, but my own father isn't entirely different. Not that bad, but he took care of us. I mean he fed us, taught us about God--and yet over time, distance just kept growing. Someone taking care of you isn't enough without love behind it. And yes, you can come to care for people you take care of. You learn to love them--but if you know you are using them the whole time, many people only come to hate them, because they remind them of what trash they are. I can't tell you, Emerald, if Cinder ever loved you. But she is the kind of woman who love makes more of a terror than pure indifference does. Learn to recognize people like that now, and not to trust them. She never does a thing if it doesn't get her something in return. That love is profane, and you will hate who you love and still not call it hatred, because you desire them, in a way, to care for you, but you devour that love and give nothing back to them. And when that love is gone, because no one can fill a sieve like that forever, they hate you all the more and they toss you aside."
She looked sad there, but not wholly sad, just grave. "Being in great need often means you have a lot of love that you've never been able to give out. Some of us need to give love as much as we need to receive it. If you meet someone like Cinder, who never does, they're broken inside, and it can be hard to fix them. Only God can do it. But you, don't let it break you. She doesn't deserve your love, but love is not about desert. You shouldn't give up on caring about people, but don't try to fill someone who won't be filled, who will never say 'enough'. That's all."
Emerald had never heard anything like good advice in her life, and this struck her as kind of important.
"So are you saying that Cinder did love me, but she stopped because she's selfish?" she asked.
"Maybe, or maybe she never did," Shine said. "It's interesting that Mercury pointed it out, though. I can't imagine that boy knows what love is like, based on what you've said about his childhood."
"No, no, he said his father hated him," Emerald said. "I mean, I'd guess that he just doesn't think anyone loves anybody who's like us."
"That a very astute observation," Shine said. "I'm not surprised he thinks that. And he will prove himself right on purpose as long as he does."
"Why would he want to do that?" Pyrrha asked.
"We tend to adapt to what we are raised in," Shine said. "That's why. Pyrrha, you just admitted that you act like you're not bothered by things because people treat you that way. That's no different than this. But we can learn different, like you did. I think it's always going to be a choice. I've been working on recovery for years, and I still have to choose not to think the worst of interactions with people."
"You seem so confident," Pyrrha said.
"So do you," Shine said. "But no one is that confident, Pyrrha. We're just good at hiding it."
Pyrrha pursed her lips.
"And hey, you have to be sometimes," Shine said. "The world will eat you up and spit you out if you act on every emotion, but there are people you need to be able to be honest with. Or you'll shrivel up inside. That's the truth. I have people like that. You do too. Emerald, you have the beginnings of it at least, I think. Just keep trying. I would hate if what you took away from Cinder is that love is foolish. She is the fool, not you."
"A fool for buying it," Emerald said.
"Em, none of us are smart enough to spot it the first time," Shine said. "I've been duped by people many, many times, till I learned. You think you're embarrassed? Imagine, I'm much older than you, and I've only recently started setting boundaries. Wally could tell you I've been quite the handful...but then, he wouldn't because he's super sweet. Too good for me."
"I don't think he thinks so," Pyrrha said. "You really are so sweet. I've never seen you fight."
"We don't do it in front of you," Shine said. "But we fight. Not badly, usually, but we have our misunderstandings, but the reason we have overcome it is because both of us can admit we're wrong and need to learn. If only one person ever says that, something is wrong. In any relationship, not just romantic ones."
"I think you two are sickeningly sweet," Emerald said.
"Oh, don't be envious," Shine said. "You think you can't be like that, but you can. One day. You'd have to work at it. Do you think I was like this at your age? Oh gosh, no... You'd hardly recognize me from then. A lot can change in 5 years. That's the good news."
"I hope that's true," Pyrrha said.
"You, I don't worry about," Shine said. "I doubt anything could deter you, Pyrrha. You're not invincible, but indomitable, certainly."
"I like that better anyway." Pyrrha tossed her hair.
"Weirdos," Emerald muttered.
Suddenly, they all started laughing for some reason. Maybe they were just nervous.
"I take it hanging out with us hasn't sucked as much as you thought," Shine said. "Is it disappointing to find out we're not happy all the time?"
"I'm just surprised you're this messed up," Emerald said. "Starting to rethink my idea that heroes are really stable."
"Whoever told you that?" Shine said.
"I don't think that's true," Pyrrha said. "I think we just aspire to help people, that's all. Don't you want to do that also? Just not the crazy, evil, witch-people now."
They snickered again.
"Why is this funny?" Emerald said.
"We're all realizing the situation is ridiculous," Shine said. "I mean, I find it hilarious, you know...how hard evil people try to be important, but they're all nothing. Dust in the wind, that's all. You know the books say that God laughs at their evil plans. One might as well say their nefarious ones. I think of that when I get stressed about evil. But we should really go to sleep. I've had a long day of playing mind games with Watts, and no doubt tomorrow I'll be trying to maneuver him into position, so I need a clear head."
"I still have no idea how you pulled that off." Emerald laid down on her stomach and pulled the sheets up--not that it was really that cold. "Watts is really tricky. How did he not catch on?"
"I just made sure that if he caught on, he'd only think I was trying to be clever," Shine said. "I assure you, he has no idea what I really want him to do."
"Lead us all to that...person?" Pyrrha asked.
"I mean, he probably could guess that part," Shine said. "But that's not that important. Still, best not to discuss this here. The walls have ears. Good night, ladies, and if you have any nightmares, let me know and I'll kick them in the teeth. No problem."
"What a visual," Pyrrha said.
But this might have been the first night since coming to Vacuo that none of them had nightmares, at least in that room.
[Maybe they didn't want to get kicked in the teeth...haha.]
* * *
Victoria Kanap got a call from Theodore the same night.
"This had better be important," she said. "I've got a test going on here. I think I may be close to getting this thing to shoot out electric shocks."
"I don't want to hear about your morbid obsession," Theodore said. "Just a heads up, I think you should lie low. They're questioning Watts now. I'm pretty sure he's going to spill about you. He can't tell anything else useful till he knows where the Maiden is."
"He'd want them to find her and he'd follow them." Victoria knew Watts too well. "That SOB. Why did you let them?"
"Qrow was pushing about it, and it's not like I could tell him I was using the guy already. I had no choice but to give in," Theo said. "I'm trying to play both sides here, and Vara is getting restless. I even tried taking her out to help her feel a little less trapped, but I think it made it worse."
"That always makes it worse, Dory." Victoria held up a vial and examined its temperature. "Not hot enough..."
"What?"
"Not you, the vial... I was saying that it always makes it worse when you take them out of the cage and let them see. Then they never want to go back in."
"I'm not caging her. It's for her safety," Theo said.
"That's what we all say," Victoria said. "But you're scared. And she knows it. Vara is not like my son, smart and quiet. She's a lightning bolt. I sort of admire it in a way, but she's stupid too."
"She's not stupid."
"Come on, lover boy, you think so, deep down," Victoria said. "Why else did you come to me?... Does Qrow know what happened to that last Maiden yet?"
"No," Theo said.
"And you're not going to tell him?" Victoria said.
"Have you told Kip the truth about what you do yet?" Theo asked.
"If he needed to know, I would tell him," Victoria said. "The boy is innocent. Why spoil it? It's not the same thing. Vara is not your kid, Dory, she's your... Are you two still going steady or did she call it off?"
"Things are complicated," Theo said. "And it's none of your business."
"Touchy about it, aren't we?" Victoria said. "That difference of moral code can really drive a wedge in your relationship, you know. I think your mistake was ever telling her all of our ideas."
"Not all of them," Theo said. "She's still against human testing... Still, I don't know what else to do. One more thing--Raven Branwen is lurking around town somewhere."
Victoria stopped short. "Raven Branwen...Ozpin's other eye."
"Yeah," Theo said.
Victoria drew in a fast breath. "Raven has magic inside her, Theodore...a very little of it, but that might be for the best. I doubt it would kill her to...extract it."
"She's a traitor anyway. I think if she was a little de-powered, it wouldn't hurt us any," Theo said. "We can try to deliver her to you, but you'd have to act fast. They expect us to hand her over. Can you do it?"
Victoria looked at some of her notes. "If I can discard the danger factor, it's possible some things I have tried might work. Also, her bird form can be separated from the rest of her. I've not had a singular state to target... If anything might work, this might. But she's no pushover. She'd fight her way out of here tooth and claw. I can nullify her, but I'd have to get close."
"We need a little leverage," Theo said. "The trouble is that I can't let the others suspect I have anything to do with this till we get results. I'll have to set it up...but I'm going to need Kip's help."
"What? No!" Victoria said. "Are you off your cracker, Dory?"
"First, quit calling me that," Theodore said. "Second, he won't get hurt any. Give him one of your stupid weapons. I just need it to be him--to get her to your lab. I need leverage so she won't try to escape. He can handle that much. The boy is itching to be out of the house..."
"I don't like this," Victoria said.
"Think, Victoria, you're so close," Theodore said, more coaxingly. "You just need to take the last step. Stop doting on your little baby bird and let him do something of importance. We can make it safer for him. I thought you said he was combat ready."
"Do not use those infuriating phrases on me!" Victoria snapped. "He's not like the Penny Project. He's my own flesh and blood. You couldn't understand that, Theodore. Like an extension of myself."
"Then he can take care of himself," Theodore said. "If you don't do this, you can kiss all your hard work goodbye. Salem will level this whole place and Kip too. You think he'll escape? Get real."
"You are despicable!" Victoria kicked something hard, and it rattled like a shutter.
After a long pause, she said, "All right, all right, he can do it if you swear that he won't have to fight."
"Make sure he's armed, and it shouldn't be a problem," Theodore said, "if we play our cards right. Be ready."
"I have some things to pick up tomorrow," Victoria said. "If you can hold off till then."
"Might take that long to get ready, but no later than that," Theodore said.
"Yeah, screw you." Victoria hung up and fumed for a moment, then she yelled, "Kip!"
Kip appeared so fast she thought she'd scared him.
"What is it, Mother?" he said nervously.
"Easy there, my little bird, I'm not angry," Victoria said. "I've been thinking--you've been wanting to go outside more, right?"
"Yes..." Kip said warily.
"Well, mother needs a little help with something," Victoria said. "Something I need you to bring me. I think they might be scared, so I'm going to show you how to calm them down, all right? I have some special tools...but you can't overuse them."
"Why would you bring anyone here?" Kip asked. "I mean, with me... I thought that was dangerous."
"Well, you're getting older," Victoria said. "I could use some help around here. Ever since your father died, I've had to work alone, you know. Slows you down a lot."
"Does this have something to do with Dr. Polendina?" Kip asked.
"Doctor? Since when is he a doctor?" Victoria scoffed. "And no...not yet. Soon enough for that. But it might take us one step closer to it. Are you afraid to help me, Kip?"
"No, Mother," Kip said, though it was not quite true. "I'm always interested in what you do, just nervous to...fail."
"Oh, it won't be too difficult for you. You're smart," Victoria said. "Now let me show you."
[Hmm...this does not bode well.]
[Who's figured it out already? Who's still stumped?... I feel like the people who binge read will have a much easier time with this arc. Even writing it over several days, it was hard to keep all the elements of it straight.]