The moment Aveline stepped back into Potter mansion she could tell something was off. Not necessarily bad off, but definitely different.
James loudly declaring they should go upstairs and nap before dinner then practically dragging Aveline up the stairs before she could protest.
In the whole six year she had known James she literally had known him to be anti-nap. He was also so high strung with energy she didn't even think he could nap if he tried.
"What? Why?" she asked him as he was pushing him by the shoulders into her room.
James had always been a horrible liar. She could tell but the way his face was turning red and he was looking anywhere but her eyes.
"You look exhausted," he blurted out.
"I look exhausted?" she asked, crossing her arms clearly offended.
James was panicking, running his hands through his hair. It only intensified as Aveline sent him a warning glare. Testing him if he really wanted to call her exhausted looking on her birthday one more time.
"Okay fine!" James broke. "We're trying to throw you a tiny surprise party but we need you to lock yourself in a room so it can be a surprise!" James blurted out, throwing his hand over his mouth.
"Don't tell anyone I told you!"
Her face broke out into a grin and she sent James a wink before shutting her door. The second she heard him walking away she started giggling to herself over how idiotic James could be sometimes.
She flopped down on her bed, picking up a book on her bed side table to flip through. It was one Remus had given her a few years book. A collection of the brothers Grimm's fairy tales. Her favourite was always the twisted version of cinderella, letting her eyes skim over it as she waited.
Eventually she decided she might as well touch up her makeup for the evenings events.Making her way to the small chair and table sat in the corner of the room. She always liked doing her makeup the muggle way. There was something so soothing about the process.
A knock on her door sounded and she hauled herself
up, opening it to reveal Remus standing there. A small wrapped box in his hand.
"C-can I come in?" he asked, sounding a bit nervous. He was usually as confident as ever, and it was slightly adorable to see the red flush on his cheeks.
"Yeah of course," she said lightly, smiling up at him and stepping aside.
The door shut behind behind as Aveline wandered back over to table, sitting back down on her chair to apply a layer of lipgloss. For a moment Remus just watched her. Her lips pouted as she leaned forward in the mirror, the look of the gloss swiping over her lips.
"What's up?" she asked, turning around to grin at him.
Remus was a flustered mess. The sight of her all done up in her short summer dress, the blush on her cheeks and the sparkle highlighting her face from the makeup she had just applied.
An angel, was perhaps the best thing he could describe her. A glowing radiant being of such beauty he couldn't even comprehend it.
"This is for you," he said rather quickly, passing her the wrapped box in his hand. "It's really not much but.."
She cut him off, reaching out and squeezing his hand.
Delicately she unwrapped the paper, as if she was scared of ripping it. He watched, her the box fumbling in her fingers.
It was a necklace. One made of gold with a charm of a sun on the end. Glowing little stones in the center of it. The moment she saw it she let out a little gasp.
It was dainty, a contrast to the god awful jewelry her parents usually made her war. Her face lit up, as she picked it up her hands to look at it closer.
"Oh Remus its perfect," she hushed, giving her tooth grin.
Before he could react she jumped up, pulling him into a tight hug. He was frozen for a moment before hugging her back, resting his chin on top of her head.
"You think?" he asked.
She nodded her head, titling her chin to look up at him.
"Would you?" she asked, handing it to him.
She turned around, holding her hair up with one hand so he could easily put the necklace on. He fumbled the tiny clasp between his fingers, his heart racing as he clipped it around her neck. The girl dropping her hair like a soft waterfall down her back.
"it's lovely," she awed, staring at the eyes the charm fell right below her collarbones. "Thank you, thank you, thank you!"
She hugged him again and he was practically frozen. Trying to memorize the way her warm body felt against his.
He almost forgot that he had been sent up there to bring her downstairs. The sight of her smile sending his brain into stardust— Halos in his eyes and stars in his mind.
"Oh!" He said suddenly. "They sent me to come get you,—"
"James told me about the surprise party," she blurted out, throwing her hand over her mouth.
Remus chuckled, shaking his head not at all surprised by what he was revealing. He reached out towards her, offering a hand.
"Well I hope your a good actor then. Euphemia will have a piss if she finds out James spoiled the surprise."
__________
It was almost alarming, how well Aveline put on a shocked expression when she walked into the surprise party. By the look on her face and in her eyes when everyone jumped out yelling surprise, anyone would've thought she had zero clue. Though on the inside she was biting back laughter, watching James relieved expression when she played along.
"Happy birthday Aveline!"
It was Lily Evans, and the rest of the Gryffindor girls. The party was small— as to not overwhelm her. Just the group of Gryffindor, Dorcas, the Potter parents and— surprisingly— Remus's parents as well. They always adored the girl, and got no resist the invitation to join for dinner when the Potter's asked.
"Thanks Lils!" she greeted back, pulling the girl into a tight hug.
It was odd for her, having everyone here to just celebrate her. Though luckily for the most part everyone was happy to entertain themselves through chatting and busying themselves with the many drinks and snacks set out.
The only thing cutting the edge from her nerves was the muggle alcoholic drink Fleamont had poured for in a fancy class. She had zero clue what it was, though it tasted like lime.
It wasn't that she didn't appreciate their efforts— in fact it warmed her heart, made her more happy then she knew how describe. It was that despite this is made her a tiny bit emotional, pulling on the strings buried deep in her chest.
"Cake time!" Euphemia declared her voice cutting over the party. "Aveline dear, come sit."
She was motioning to the chair at the head of the dining room table. Aveline stood up from where she was sitting on the couch next to Lily and Marlene, handing Lily her drink as she did. Everyone gathered around the table, the lits dim as everyone began to sing.
It was the same song she had heard many times, though never sung to her. Her name almost sounded strange tucked into the lyrics. Like it almost shocked her that she was here— having a normal birthday.
"....happy birthday to you!"
A beautiful three tiered cake was see infront of her. Billowing candles in the dark room, the center of attention.
It was a happy moment. A moment of pure perfection.
Perhaps something was wrong with Aveline, perhaps something in her brain had been permanently fucked up, she thought to herself.
For in every happy moment— the perfect, the wonderful, the exceptional— she always felt something heavy on her chest. Nostalgia for the fact it couldn't last forever, or perhaps grief for all the joy that had been taken from her. She didn't know, though she did know her breath felt shaky, her smile a little too fake.
It was perfect. It was happy, it was everything that should've made her feel genuine joy, though it didn't. Like her mind was constantly pushing away the happiness.
It was odd, perhaps even a bit of enigma. For Aveline Rosier was the type of person who could bring sun to the darkest of days. The person who made other people smile effortless, yet her own felt like her face was partly frozen.
All she could think about was her family. She thought about Evan, as she stared into the flickering candles. Wondering what he was doing today— if he would ever forget to experience love and support like she did. She thought about her mother buried ten feet in the ground, body cold and lifeless. Her father sitting in a cell in azkaban rotting away to nothing.
Evan was probaly sitting alone in the mansion right now. Probably yelling at a house elf to hurry up on dinner, and staring at his own reflection in the long, dreadful vases sitting on the dining room table.
Guilt hit her chest as she went to blow out the candles, her smile still ever fake.
She could try to let it all go.
She could throw a party full of everyone she knew, and not invite her family because they never showed her love.
Yet she still felt sorry for leaving and growing up
"Make a wish!"
Someone called as she pursed her lips.
And she hated herself for the fact the first thought that graced her mind was—
I wish I was never born.