The end of a very long day for the hero teams should have been peaceful.
But there was too much to think about and talk about, even after the teens headed to bed.
Shine wanted to sleep, but couldn't.
She got up and found Wally in the kitchen eating snacks.
"Couldn't sleep either?" he said
"Yeah it's been quite a day," Shine said. "Seeing the Bandit camp...I mean, I've seen people die...once or twice...but I've never been so close to something that big...It was awful."
Wally nodded and put a hand on her shoulder.
Shine leaned on him silently for a moment.
"It's hard," Wally said. "I mean..every time...but the first time is really bad because it's kind of still shocking. I'm sorry you had to see it."
"I suppose it was bound to happen on this job sooner or later," Shine muttered. "I feel worse for Raven...I didn't know those people, so it was sad for me, but if it were personal, I don't know what I'd feel."
Wally didn't either. He hadn't had the feeling either...though close, sometimes.
"But on top of that, I feel guilty for some of the stuff I said the last day or so," Shine went on. "I think I've been losing my temper too much. I could put it down to stress, but that's not a good excuse."
"I think I have too," Wally said. "But you have a reason to be stressed...I mean this has been super hard. And you've been doing a lot, since Winter has been down, Qrow has been MIA,and Raven, let's be real, doesn't really help us that much. Hazel's not really a leader, so that le mostly you to be the organized one. I'm sucky at that. I should probably be helping you more though."
"But you had your hands full with the resources stuff," Shine said. "And to be real, they'd have lost a lot more people if you weren't here. Between you and Penny, you're a small army...at least the food collection went well."
"Yeah...that was fun.." Wally said.
* * *
Wally's whole plan had just been to ask people to help out in person with the refugees...
Vaccou didn't have a lot of things you could call "neighborhoods" so much as assortments of houses and shops that people migrated around. Bigger structures were for the wealthy.
Team JNPR going with him, had run into some heat with some of the people who recognized them, but Pyrrha's fame also did her some favors--sort of. A couple people wanted to fight her.
She might have obliged if the others hadn't told her to focus on the assignment and not draw undue attention. They were still worried about Tyrian.
At first, of course, any request had been met with scorn and people mocking Atlas and Mantle for being wimps.
JNPR had almost lost it at that, Nora wanted to break their legs, and Ren felt like quitting, while Arkos was...discouraged and confused.
But Wally kept his head.
He calmly told the people about how bad it was in the refugee camp, and he knew Vaccou had it rough too, but they still had a chance here to be the good guys. He also said that in all fairness, he should just ask them to help and not get anything in gratitude, so he'd lend them a hand if they needed something.
At first people were dubious about that, but when Wally speed cleaned a shop free of dust and re-sorted the wares into the correct spots, they warmed up to it a little.
Within the hour he had a fair amount donations from vendors who said they'd do it in exchange for getting help cleaning.
JNPR, catching on, offered to guard some stalls from thieves while the owners needed a lunch break or to run errands.
At first if it was slow to catch on, but bit by bit more people began to like the idea of getting free help in exchange for some food.
It couldn't be said it was all the best quality but it was edible.
Then someone asked Wally if he'd set up wanted posters for them all over the city and he did that.
Pyrrha thought it was great idea to do people favors and she was able to help move a broken wagon's axle.
Jaune helped out with some minor medical injuries also.
Nora and Ren had less skills of this sort, but Nora was game to try moving stuff.
At first it wasn't going to be enough, but it added up of the course of the afternoon.
And some people, impressed by their good attitude, came up and gave them stuff for nothing in exchange.
Others said they were idiots, which annoyed Ren, but the others brushed it off.
One lady said she felt sorry for all the children in the refugees who were missing their homes, and it wasn't their fault if their parents were snobs. She gave them 100 lien.
Wally had to borrow a cart from someone who agreed to let him use it if he'd finish their deliveries for them, and then he put the stuff they got in it and they all took it back to the camp.
Somewhere, though it shouldn't have, it went around the whole camp and it seemed like everything got at least some food.
Water had to be brought from the Oasis, but with less grimm around, the huntsmen were finally able to do this without being attacked and that problem was solved for the time being...though they really needed a better system.
"You see," Wally told team JNPR. "A lot of people really aren't as mean as they seem at first, they're just busy and tied up in their own lives. But if you really treat them right, they might bring out their best, and maybe they'll even think of someone else. It's just about making them feel safe, not like you're just out to get something from them. I once had a Christmas visit with a supervillain just because both of us thought that kids are worth it, and we should encourage them to give some good back to the world...you won't see this on the news much, but kindness sticks with people, it really does."
"I feel like we shouldn't have to beg people for help," Ren said. "It's just the right thing to do."
Wally wasn't in the mood to really argue, but after a pause he said. "Yeah it is, but people can forget that. Wasn't that Emerald chick a street thief once? I guess no one helped her out, so it happens...maybe there's just too many people in need for us to get them all, but I just think people don't all try either. So we can encourage them to just help each other out. Heck, sometimes even people who don't like each other will help a brother out just because they feel bad for their situation. It's amazing what people will do."
"I think he's right about that," Jaune said brightly. "Kindness matters."
"It always matters," Pyrrha said. "Even just little kindnesses. I'm just glad they helped at all."
"Yeah," Nora said. "But all this food is making me hungry."
* * *
"So yeah it was nice," Wally finished. "I mean, at least we did something other than fight monsters for a while."
"I'm sure they all needed a reminder of what really matters," Shine mused. "We all can get on our high horses about the fate of the world, but I can't help but remember that Jesus and the Apostles said that the highest form of goodness was helping people who are less fortunate than us and in less high standing. I forget that too easily."
"Ah, no you don't," Wally said. "You're generous and helpful. I've seen it."
"Not as much as you," Shine said. "I try...hey it's all right, you do have a power that makes it really easy to help a lot of people, that's great. sometimes I envy it. That's your thing, I think the team must have realized that."
"Well, it's not about me," Wally said. "Turns out Vacuo isn't all bad. There's nice people here, same as everywhere...sure some did try to steal out of our cart, but we taught them and they backed off...so no big deal. It made me feel a little better about this though, I was starting to feel like Remnant is just the world where everyone is a jerk all the time because of the grimm and the wars and stuff...but there's people here who are willing to help each other."
"Yeah," Shine said. "Rare, but there's a few... remember that our religion is the primary reason for charity in my world and yours too, it's no surprise it's less here, but there are people like Pyrrha who just seem to know on instinct that we're supposed to help others. I'm glad to hear it...wish I could have seen it, but even hearing it helps."
"Well we'll have to do it again," Wally said. "Unless people come to us on purpose to help...the weird thing is, I think some of them maybe wanted to already, but it was like they were afraid to...either it was because of the grimm being so close or they thought Atlas wouldn't like it if they did. Maybe we scare them."
"A bunch of touchy military people running a tight ship would probably scare a kingdom of thieves and scoundrels," Shine said. "That is one thing I hadn't thought of...maybe it's just the image...it always goes both ways right? But hopefully that will wear off now that we've been here several days. The dust ought to help too. I should feel good...but I'm too tired, and like I said, I feel guilty. I should apologize to them."
"If you think you need to," Wally said. "I'm not sure if I really feel like I said anything wrong or not, but it's up to you. I mean I can go with you..."
"No, I think I had better do this alone," Shine said. "We shouldn't want to seem like we're badgering each other--or ganging up on them, I suppose."
"I think some of the adults are still up," Wally said. "I'm sure Ice Queen never went to her room. Hey, she's thawing out though, she seemed almost nice today."
"I doubt she had the energy to be frigid," Shine said. "I mean I like her either way, but I admit it's nice if it feels like she doesn't see us as worms."
"She's cool," Wally said. "I think Qrow might be warming up to us a little, I didn't hear him say anything insulting today."
"Well...on the plane he tried, but it was admittedly less than before," Shine said. "Whatever Winter said to them all the day before, it must have worked, I hardly had any lip from them today...what's her secret?"
"I dunno," Wally shrugged. "But I guess don't kick a gift horse, right? 'Bout time someone stood up for us..."
"Yeah well...it is hard to get used to something so new," Shine said. "Maybe I'd feel the same as them."
"I really doubt that's true, but I guess you have a point...it's weird," Wally said. "But they just don't have to be a jerk about it. I mean, you said Qrow really laid into you the day the others came back...I just don't like it. I don't think it's okay to threaten people like that who are helping you, even if they get on your nerves."
"Yeah...but consider the pressure they've been under, and the fact that it's bringing out the less nice aspects of our characters also," Shine said. "I think I'd rather just have the water under the bridge. I'm sick of being angry. Who does it help anyway?"
"I guess I'd be okay if they just didn't upset you," Wally said. "I'm pretty used to being brushed off..."
"I'm used to being insulted," Shine said.
"Yeah, but you shouldn't have to be," Wally said.
"You shouldn't have to be either, but it is how it is, people treat people unfair," Shine said. "Either you let it make you down, or you get over it...Not that it's not discouraging..." she sighed. "But we can't quit. We have to be there for Oscar and for the others too. If he thinks we're taking this too hard, he's going to feel guilty."
"I don't mind helping him at all," Wally said. "And I'd help the others, even if they were jerks, I just don't like getting judged for it. Like why would I listen to them, if they've only been jerks to us."
"True..." Shine didn't know what to tell him there, she thought the same thing.
[With all their awkward moments, Shine and Wally really don't do anything to warrant that response. The sad thing is people do take out their fear and anxiety over new things on the people they blame for them, instead of just accepting that it's making them uncomfortable because it's foreign. It's not pretty but it's reality. Sometimes people can be a bit hard on the OG characters in fan fiction, but I think most of us would have a hard time adjusting to it if we were in their shoes. It is what it is.]
* * *
Qrow had been out on the parapets for while, but getting bored of that he went to the school library.
All this talk of stories had made him curious about the book that started all this. "The Girl Who Fell Through The World."
If he'd known it was a true story, he would have read it when Dr. Oobleck had recommended it.
He wasn't the only one with that idea, by now Raven had thought of it also, and so had Winter.
And both of them had already grabbed the only two copies in the library, same ones Emerald and Oscar had looked at earlier.
Raven, of course, wasn't anywhere near Winter, she was sitting in the window of one wall, and she wasn't reading it much, her mind was too full of the sorrow and humiliation of the day.
She sighed and gazed out at Vacuo...to think this is what had become of her efforts to escape.
Winter, fighting the headache that kept coming back when she strained herself too long, still was trying to make sense of the book's style.
Somehow it didn't strike her as the same as Shine and Wally's attitude at all.
She saw Qrow look at the spot where the book was and realizing it wasn't there.
She raised an eyebrow.
"There's really only one copy," Qrow said, since no one else was there.
"I believe your sister got the other," Winter said coolly. "It's not a long story...And it's not helpful."
She sipped her water.
"To think it was true the whole time and he never said a thing..." Qrow muttered.
Join the club, Winter wanted to say but didn't.
"So it doesn't tell any more about that strange woman," Qrow didn't feel right saying her by her name. When he'd never met Alicia...it felt like talking about a ghost almost.
Even if apparently she was still alive.
"No," Winter mused. "It seems more metaphorical than anything else...But what's annoying about it is, I can't shake the impression that the author is writing it with almost...this sense of remorse. The girl in the world is not that dismal herself, but she's lonely...it's almost like the author feels worse for her than she does for herself."
"Wouldn't that just make sense," Qrow said flatly. "At least he feels guilty...yay.." the sarcasm was obvious.
Winter had her own thoughts about Ozpin's actions as told by Oscar and the DJs. But she wondered why Shine hadn't made them out to be more villainous than just foolish. She didn't seem to think this made Ozpin their enemy...even after all that.
She shut the book. "I don't think this is going to be of much use. But if you want to see for yourself, be my guest."
She held it up dismissively.
Qrow was still curious enough to want to see for himself, so he took it--brushing her hand by accident.
Winter thought little of that but she moved her arm the wrong way as she let go and suddenly a stab of pain went up it. The heat and exhaustion of the last couple days had slowed down her arms' recovery from that fight with Cinder so much that they were still pretty sore..she probably should have left the braces on one more day... she was getting tired of them but this wasn't the first time she'd regretted it.
The book was knocked to the table and she grabbed her arm with her free hand.
"Easy there, no one was going to bite you," Qrow said.
"I'm not fully recovered," Winter said through gritted teeth. The throbbing stopped slowly. She opened her fingers...they were still shaking. "I'm puzzled how one crazed lunatic did so much damage."
She pursed her lips. When she found Cinder--but then she stopped that thought...Shine's words of earlier hadn't left her...maybe this was petty...and a distraction.
Qrow shrugged and picked up the book and opened it. "This is pretty depressing..." he muttered. "Geez Oz... a eulogy would have been shorter."
That was almost funny...
Shine came into the library right then, startling them all.
Raven ignored her however, after the first quick look.
Winter almost felt caught for some reason, since Shine took in the whole scene and smiled oddly.
"What do you want?" Qrow said, rather gruffly.
"I'd guess a book," Winter thought that was a stupid question.
"Actually no," Shine said. "Though I wouldn't mind browsing here later...but I actually just wanted a moment of your time."
She was looking at Qrow.
"For?" Qrow said defensively.
Shine raised an eyebrow. "I'm not going to set you on fire...but then again, I suppose I sort of deserve that response...I just wanted to say, I feel bad about the other day. I shouldn't have lost my temper like that and the...well the violent reaction was uncalled for. I hope you can believe I'm sorry."
"Unless you tried to kill him, I wouldn't think such a thorough apology would be necessary," Winter said.
"Maybe not to you," Shine said. "But I don't like to be that way."
"Well, don't beat yourself up," Qrow thought this was stupid. "It's not like anyone around here is so against violence. It didn't even hurt that much, you're kind of a wimp."
Shine raised an eyebrow again. "If you say so."
"Besides, you really think that's the first time a woman has done that," Qrow added.
"Tried to stab you?" Winter guessed.
"No, it was just a slap," Qrow said. "I didn't even really care at the time, not sure why you're upset about it now."
"Well, maybe you don't care, but I do," Shine said. "And I said some stuff I shouldn't have said also, I think...well I haven't tried very hard to see it from your POV and that's a bit hypocritical of me. I want to be consistent."
"If that's all it takes to break your moral code, I don't think you'd do too well at the academy," Qrow said. "Getting a little worked up isn't that weird...Like I said, not really sure why you're apologizing."
"I'm sure he deserved worse than that," Winter said helpfully.
"Winter, I know you're kidding," Shine said, though Winter wasn't kidding...at least she didn't think she was. "But that's not making me feel better. I'm sure Qrow has been having the worst week without me adding to it."
Winter looked at her in disbelief. "Do you live in your own world, Likstar?" She said incredulously.
"Yeah," Shine said, like "duh."
Qrow finally laughed--that was just so ridiculous because it was true...apparently.
"What a day..." he muttered. "Look kid, forget about it. To be honest, I had that coming and a lot worse. I'm sure you're not asking me to apologize."
"I never have heard you apologize," Shine said oddly. "I'm not sure you know how to."
Winter tilted her head...apologize...that wasn't something anyone did that often in the huntsmen line of work.
"I guess it's not a habit," Qrow said. "But this is probably as close as it gets."
Pause.
"I'll take it," Shine said, after a moment. "I mean... in your way you're saying you were wrong...which is true. That's all that's really accomplished by an apology. I don't really care about more than that. The rest is just petty."
"There's not a lot of room for hurt feelings in this kind of situation," Qrow said. "I wouldn't expect to get much acknowledgement from the others if you think they've been unfair. Maybe you have a right to complain about all of us, but people aren't going to just play it nice when they're worried about their lives."
"I'm well aware of that," Shine said. "I didn't expect that...but you see, my religion says that I need to be like that no matter what. So I can expect myself to be better than that."
She tugged her hair nervously. "It is still not easy to say I was wrong..."
"The treatment you've received would try the patience of any one," Winter said flatly. "Vacuo's reception of us has been pretty much the same and I wanted to skin them alive. I'm not sure why you feel you're in the wrong at all. You can be a bit abrasive, but in the military, we don't look for nice, we look for competent. That's all that matters."
"I've been told my whole life that I'm not nice enough," Shine shrugged, looking sober. "The trouble is, when I clash with people, I double down. That's how I've always been, for better or worse, and stopping is hard. I could have really made all this easier on myself and Wally if I was more flexible, but I don't like to give up any ground. I've been called arrogant, harsh, and that ever popular 'you always think you're right' line so many times I can predict it. However, I've had time to think today and I thought that even if you have implied as much, you all have an insane amount of pressure on you that most people don't. Taking all this personally is probably a mistake. So I should have kept that in mind before. I suppose I'm making excuses for myself now, but it can help to understand why someone is defensive at times, and know it has nothing to do with you."
She paused. "One other thing--I didn't anticipate how much worse it would be to have a partner who was also thrown under the bus. There are times I act out more because of someone else. And that was why I got angry at you in the tent also. I overreacted, but I saw that Neo and Roman were afraid, and I felt responsible for them, since they came to me. I didn't want to show weakness or fear and give them a reason to think they wouldn't be safe. The truth is, I can get caught up in defending people who I think are weaker and forget that other people still have feelings and deserve some consideration... I need to work on that. Wally is way better at that than I am, I admit. But no one likes to be treated like the bad guy. I should know that... That is why I feel bad also."
Winter thought Shine was a saint if this was really her reasoning. Most people would just say it was about their wounded dignity and think that was enough.
Actually this was kind of embarrassing to listen to. How many times did she get angry over personal slights?
[Though to be fair to Winter, she is far more defensive of people she esteems than she is of herself, so she and Shine might actually be alike here...and Qrow also, really. All of them are like that.]
Qrow wondered if Shine was trying to make him feel guilty on purpose.
"Are you saying you really see those two scoundrels as anyone you need to protect?" he said.
Shine's penitent air vanished as fast as if he'd pressed a button.
"Why does it matter?" she said, firmly. "I mean, they came to me. And, once you were a Bandit yourself. I would think out of all people here, you'd be the most sympathetic to them. Who has had to make the biggest turn around out of this group? I mean, at this point that's debatable, but before we took on criminals, it would have been you."
"All right, easy there, tiger." Qrow had way overshot apparently. "I just wanted an explanation."
"Maybe don't phrase it that way then." Shine calmed down. "You see what I mean? I get really defensive."
"Yeah, I noticed." Qrow rubbed his face. "I might admire that if it was directed at people I thought were worth it. And it's not just about them being thieves. There's a substance to people, even if they're in the wrong walk of life. I don't think either of those two really care about anything other than themselves--maybe each other, if you buy that. If you expect them to be loyal to you or this group or to care about the mission, I think you're going to end up disappointed."
"Who said I expect that?" Shine said. "What does that have to do with helping them? Forget the mission for a moment...some people just need help."
A pause.
Maybe at one time Qrow would have said the same thing... He had to wonder when he'd stopped thinking that.
"Well..." he said slowly, "if you feel that way, I guess none of us should stand in your way. I just don't quite get you though. You and that partner of yours just showed up, started doing crazy stuff, and now we know you're not the first. You have bigger fish to fry--why would you bother getting involved with cheap criminals who most people even around here would write off? Isn't it just a distraction?"
Shine fingered the back of one of the chairs at the table. "Funny, Wally and I were just talking about that a few minutes ago... Our founder and leader once told a very chilling parable about who would be accepted at the last day when He gives everyone their just reward. He uses this measuring method: Whoever gave Him clothes, whoever visited Him in prison, whoever tended to him while He was sick, who ever fed Him. And everyone will ask Him when they ever saw Him that way. And He will tell them, as much as they did that to the least of these (that is, humanity), they did it to Him."
She glanced up, with a quiet look for her. "See, our Lord isn't like your leaders. You all go by strength, talent, and ability. Those things are fine. We should use them as we can. But they don't determine value. We give people more importance who are stronger or richer or smarter. But He does not do that. He loves people who are weak, who are broken, and who are the screw ups, the vagabonds, the sinners. I didn't always understand why that was, but once I began doing this World Walking thing, I've come to see it. It's because those people know they need help, and they aren't prideful about it. They accept what help they get. The successful people think they've got it figured out, and if you don't do it their way, they don't like you."
"Some people might think that means that you go for people who are vulnerable," Qrow said.
Winter glanced at him.
Shine didn't lose her temper for some reason.
"Qrow, I hope you understand how hurtful to me what you just said was," she said steadily. "As it would have been to you, no doubt. I'm not a monster. This isn't about taking advantage of people. If you knew you could help someone, wouldn't it just kill you if they wouldn't let you? Would it be wonderful to find someone who would and who didn't fight it? When you have that gift inside you, you want to share it. And not having an outlet can be quite painful. So when you find anyone who is open, you seize that opportunity. I suppose it would be diabolical if I was doing it for my own benefit...but I'm not. I won't get rich or famous over it--at least I better not." She made a face. "Still, it bothers me that after weeks of knowing us, you still think so little of us. If that is my fault for acting poorly, I hope to fix it. But I really don't know if it is."
"I'm sure you're not giving that impression," Winter said pointedly, glaring at Qrow again. "Your motives escape me, but if you were out to use these people, why not do it in secret? All of us know, so you would never get away with it. I've seen you plan things enough to think you're crafty enough to know better. If it benefits you or not, I have no idea myself, but it couldn't be by preying on people who are weak. They don't strike me as that obliging."
Shine laughed. "No, they aren't, really. Stubborn little punks, aren't they? I kind of like it though. I like people with a bit of spice and backbone. They take more initiative than meek people do."
"I didn't mean to offend you," Qrow said, a bit less tightly. "It just doesn't add up."
"Once I thought you and Ruby thought the same as we do," Shine said. "Aren't you a teacher, Qrow? You do know the joy of having a willing student? Even if they aren't all geniuses, isn't the cooperative student better?"
"Really, they allowed him to teach?" Winter had heard this before, but it had still baffled her even then.
"Oh, Qrow is quite good at it," Shine said before he could answer. "I watched those videos he made for Remnant history. I thought they were great, very helpful."
"I still want to know how you saw those," Qrow said. "They were for the school."
"You expect me to answer that?" Shine said.
"No," Qrow said.
"Good, well goodnight." Shine waved cheerfully. "Another long day tomorrow, no doubt."