PEYTON
Thankfully, the guy Trinity brought home wasn't much more than a two pump chump, and he left as soon as the deed was done. Trinity grunted something unsatisfactory in her drunken state, but rolled over and went to sleep. Just like that.
I, on the other hand, couldn't even fathom what had just happened. I stared into the darkness with a pounding heart and an open mouth. All the while, Trinity snored away in the bed across from me like nothing had happened.
There was no way I could live this way.
As soon as the first morning light seeped in between the shades, I got out of bed and made my way to the bathroom, where I got dressed. There was nobody else awake, but that was fine by me. I needed some time to sort out my thoughts. So much had happened since I arrived back on campus less than 24 hours earlier.
The campus was almost as deserted as the bathroom had been. I walked around for almost an hour before I decided to call Max. I considered texting Beau or Amanda, but he was on West Coast time and most likely asleep. Amanda would only get wound up, and there was really nothing she could do about it. Max, however, was usually up early with all the morning lifts and stuff he had to do. Plus, he was involved with the residence department.
He answered after only two rings. "What's up QB?"
"Hey."
"What's going on? You're up early."
"Yeah." That was for sure, and not really by choice. "Do you have anything going on this morning, or do you want to go get a cup of coffee?"
He hesitated. "Um, just coffee?"
That made me giggle. "We can get food too if you're hungry." Which he usually was.
He chuckled. "Yeah. Food sounds good. Want me to come get you?"
"No, I'm already out. I'll just walk to you."
There was some rustling in the background and Max said. "Alright, give me ten."
The walk to Max's house didn't take ten minutes, so I took my time, but despite walking slowly, I got there in half the time. The house was dark, and not wanting to wake anyone up, I sat down on the front steps and waited for Max.
He appeared a couple of minutes later. Freshly showered, with a big grin on his handsome face.
"Hey," he smiled and pulled me into a hug. He was big and solid and smelled amazing. I let myself relax against him for a few seconds, drawing strength from his embrace. But as nice as it was, it was a friendly hug, and nothing like being in Beau's arms.
I withdrew from him just to find Lance coming up the walkway towards us. He was dressed in workout clothes and, from the look of it, he'd been out for a run. There was a scowl on his face as he stared from me to Max.
"Good morning," I said, but all I got in return was some kind of grunt. Max didn't even react. He just took my hand in his and led me towards his car that was parked on the street.
"Where do you want to go?" he asked, like Lance hadn't just acted like a douche.
"How about that little pancake place we went to one time?" I suggested. The food had been amazing, and it was far enough away from campus that I didn't think any students would be there. At least not this early.
Max agreed and, after letting go of my hand, opened the door to his car for me.
"So tell me about the new roommate," he said after he got the car started. "How's that going?"
I groaned out loud.
"What?" he chuckled.
"Let's just say there's a reason why I'm up this early."
He glanced over at me. The amused expression was gone and had been replaced by a worried one.
"She's a nightmare," I stated.
"Why? What did she do?"
I took a deep breath and exhaled slowly, and then I dove into the story and told him exactly what had occurred the day before. Max's reaction was just what I needed. He finished parallel parking and looked up at me with a solemn expression.
"When we get back to campus, we're going to report her."
I grimaced. "You don't think that's going to make it worse?"
"QB," he chuckled. "How can it get worse?"
"I guess you have a point."
His smile spread across his face. "Let's get you some pancakes. That'll make this day better."
I truly hoped so.
Max opened the door for me. I stepped into the small breakfast place where the smells of bacon and sugary sweet dough hung in the air. There were only a few other guests, and they were all older than us.
"Mornin," a gray-haired waitress called out to us. "Y'all seat yourselves. I'll be right over."
We chose the corner booth by the windows. The seats had high backs in a maroonish color that provided privacy.
Max placed his phone on the table and slid in across from me.
A young waitress appeared immediately and placed two menus on the table. "Good morning. Can I get you coffee or tea?"
"Coffee, please," Max and I said at the same time.
"Sure thing."
She returned a minute later with two steaming cups.
"Thanks," Max said with a genuine smile as he took the cup from her. She blushed into a bright pink color, and even though it amused me, I got it. Max was attractive with his blond hair, his sparkling blue eyes, and muscular build. And she wasn't the only person to ever be dazzled by him. If I'd cared for him as more than a friend, it would have bothered me. Like it did when Beau's fans were all over him, but in this case, I just sat back and smiled.
"Are you ready to order?" the waitress asked, her focus solely on Max, which was fine by me.
"Yeah. Pancakes please."
"For two?"
"Yes, please," I responded, just as my phone signaled with a new message. I picked it up and felt my heart rate increase when I saw it was from Beau. There was a picture of him sitting on the edge of an unmade bed with messy hair and no shirt. "Got busy writing. Finally going to bed," the text said.
Damn, he was hot.
I bit down on my lip and responded with a "good night."
Max chuckled. I looked up and met his curious eyes. "That can't be from Becca."
I shook my head and put the phone down on the table just for it to buzz again with another message.
Max laughed as I picked it up again. "Miss you," Beau texted.
And damn it. My heart was off for the races again.
"QB?" Max said with a big grin. "Who is he?"
"Ah..." I could have lied to Max, like I did to the rest of the world, but it didn't feel right. The friendship we shared was too important for that. So instead I turned the phone over and showed him Beau's picture.
Max's face dropped. "Damn, girlfriend."
I just nodded. There was really no way to explain how I felt, but damn, came pretty close.
"So there was a story there, after all. The media had it right."
"Somewhat," I agreed.
Max laughed. "QB, he says he misses you."
I knew I was blushing, so I bent my head down.
"That means something, doesn't it?"
"Yeah, I guess. I'm just not sure in what way. If we're just friends..."
Max handed me back the phone. "You want to be more," he stated, and it wasn't a question.
I swallowed hard. I did want that, even though it scared the living daylights out of me.
"Maybe you should ask him," Max suggested.
"Maybe." I just wasn't sure I wanted to hear the answer.
Max took a drink from his coffee, but kept his eyes on me. I looked up and met his curious gaze.
"Don't say anything about it, Max. Okay? Nobody knows."
His eyebrows narrowed like I offended him. "I won't. Of course, I won't. Believe me, I'm very good at keeping secrets."
I did believe him.
Our pancakes appeared, and we dug in. They were just as good as I remembered. We spent the next few minutes in quiet, just eating.
"What's Lance's issue?" I asked when I was so full I couldn't fit another bite.
Max groaned. "That's a long story."
I shrugged my shoulders. "I have time."
He studied me like he was making a decision in his head.
"Max, you don't have to tell me if you don't want to," I assured him.
He sighed and closed his eyes for a second. "Nobody knows, okay?"
I nodded, recognizing whatever he was going to tell me was a secret, and a big one.
"You can't tell." His cheeks colored a light pink, but he kept the eye contact like he willed me to understand how important that was.
I reached across the table and took his large hand in mine. "I won't," I promised. "Max, I'm also good at keeping secrets."
He nodded and after a deep inhale, he closed his eyes and started to talk. "Lance and I hooked up once our sophomore year." He let that sentence hang out there as he opened his bright blue eyes. There was a fear in them I'd never seen before.
I nodded encouragingly, not wanting to interrupt the story he just started to tell me but also wanting to urge him to continue. I realized he was coming out to me and that it was a huge deal, but I wasn't surprised about what he was telling me. I already suspected that Max was gay, and that something had occurred between him and Lance. What bothered me was that he seemed scared to tell me about it.
Max looked at me for another second before he averted his eyes.
"We'd just won an important football game where we'd both got to play," he continued after clearing his voice. "It was a big deal for both of us, being sophomores and all. We were high from the adrenaline and then there was this big party. A few of the seniors had a house on the outskirts of town. Large property, a bit secluded. We were drunk. Everyone was drunk, but Lance might have been even more drunk than I thought."
Max got quiet for a couple of minutes, probably remembering exactly what had taken place two years earlier. I didn't push him, but waited patiently for him to continue while I drank my coffee.
Eventually, he took a sip from his coffee and looked back at me. "He made the first move that night. I don't want you to think I took advantage of him because I didn't."
"Oh, god. I'd never think that, Max."
He nodded. "I've known for a long time that I was gay. During puberty when my friends started to talk about boobs and what they wanted to do to them, I imagined toned hairy bodies with hard muscular chests..."
I reached out and took his hand in mine again. It was clear that this was difficult for him to talk about, but I'd never force him to do it. He clearly wanted to tell me.
Max gave my hand a gentle squeeze, and there was a slight smile on his lips.
"Are you sure you want to hear this?"
"Yeah..."
"Okay. Anyway, we were handed beers as soon as we got there, followed by shots in the backyard. The music was loud, people were dancing and making out all over the patio. We fooled around with our teammates for a while, just talking about the game and stuff. I thought he was coming on to me, but I wasn't sure since he was drinking until later that night when we were in the back of the property. There was a shed back there, and he pulled me into it. And then he kissed me like he couldn't get enough of me and I was excited. Both about having found someone like me at the school and someone interested in football."
Max let go of my hand and leaned back in his seat.
"Then what happened?" I asked, no longer able to stay quiet.
He shrugged his shoulders. "That was it. He didn't even acknowledge me after that night. I tried to talk to him or text him, but he told me to stay the fuck away from him and that he wasn't like me."
"Oh, Max." My heart hurt for him. It was obvious by the expression on his face that it had been agonizing for him.
"He started to bring girls around all the time after that. There was a constant parade of them, like he was trying to prove to me that he wasn't gay."
"Or maybe to himself," I suggested.
Max nodded. "Or that. Probably that."
"So you think he's bi?"
Max shrugged his shoulders again. "I don't know. Maybe, or maybe he's straight." He picked up the small salt shaker and turned it over and over in his hands. "Maybe he was just curious to try it. And after being with me, he decided he wasn't into guys, which is kind of funny because he sure as hell was into it when he was on his knees in front of me."
I choked on my coffee.
Max blinked a couple of times, and his face turned pink. "Sorry."
"Don't be." It wasn't Max's fault that I was inexperienced and had been raised as a bit of a prude.
I cleared my throat and looked back at Max. He'd become one of my closest friends and I couldn't imagine what it was like to keep this secret to himself. Had it always been a secret?
"Does anyone else know?" I asked.
He shook his head. "Not here. A couple of my friends back home know, and a guy I used to hook up with a town away from here, but other than that, nobody."
That had me straightening up in my seat.
"Not even your family?"
"No."
Wow. This was a huge thing to keep from your family. But then again, if his was anything like mine... Or I shouldn't say that. My mom was supportive, but she was under my dad's thumb, and there were a lot of things I didn't want him to know about.