"All right boys listen up. We have trained for weeks now, we have come through the first rounds of the championships and now we have finally reached the quarter-finals. Show what you can! Show what you know!" Mr. Williams boosted his soccer team. He nodded to himself as he heard the cheers of the boys echoing through the locker room.
"Captain, your final words please." Jasper made his way to the front, standing where his coach stood just seconds ago. He put his hands on his sides and puffed his chest out. He looked everybody in the eye, building up the tension in the room.
"Give them hell!" He roared, screaming like a madman. Soon the other boys joined them, repeating their captain's words.
Niel just kissed the cross of his necklace and said a silent prayer. His mother had taught him that. It was a stupid superstition but it had calmed him down all those previous games before so he wouldn't change his routine now. He liked the paradoxical gesture, it helped keep his anxiety at bay, so his head was in the game.
When he exited the locker room Niel felt a tap on his shoulder. He tried to withhold a wince and turned around. He was surprised when Daisy, a junior, came into his sight. "Oh, hey Daisy."
The blond girl shyly waved. "Hey."
Niel had no idea what to say next, he had no relationship whatsoever with the girl. The only reason he knew her name was because he had dropped his sweater one time and Daisy picked it up for Niel while introducing herself. It was odd to him but never thought about it again.
"Soo, uhm, I-I just wanted to wish you good luck with-with your game." Daisy's eyes were cast downward and she was fumbling with a bottle with some kind of energy drink containing it. "Here, this is for you." She handed the bottle without making eye contact.
Niel hesitantly took the small gift from her and thanked for the gesture. No idea what he had to say any further. "Well, I better get going." Daisy nodded her head and hurried away.
That was odd, Niel thought. He shrugged it off and jogged towards the field.
Everything went well until the second half of the game. Niel had to play offense but for some reason, he couldn't pass the other team's defense. Every time he had the ball it was taken from him in seconds. Constantly he had a feeling to look over his shoulder, but there was nothing there than the soccer field and the watching audience. Niel tried to brush the feeling off him but it didn't work. There was a continuous force that made him look to the top right corner of the benchers, but there was nothing there.
When the game was tied and no extra time was left to play the team came together to discuss how they would play out shooting the penalty shots. Only the first five minutes of the meeting were occupied by his coach roasting Niel in front of all his teammates.
"What happened there, boy?! You were doing so well and then, then... I know things have been tough after, after, well you know..." Niel stiffened, looking down at his feet. Why did everybody keep reminding him of last year? He asked himself. It was almost part of his identity, what he actually tried to avoid. He wanted to forgive and forget. Well, there was nothing to forgive, but forgetting he could. He tried. So hard.
"But you can't bring that shit with you here on the field, do you understand?!" His coach's words snapped him right out of it. He lowered his eyes, looking at the ground, and mumbled a small 'yes coach'.
"You are done for today, you can sit on the bench." Niel cursed inside his head. He was benched, benched! Never, ever was he benched. Especially during penalty shooting, he was the best.
They had barely won the quarter-finals that evening and you could notice it in the locker room. There was an absence of roars of joy or cheers of happiness. Confidence was what the team lacked at the moment and it was hard to find because everything was at stake. Lakewood High's soccer team was frustrated at a boy who was their former captain named Othniel.
It was Jasper who finally broke the silence as he made his way to the most frustrated boy of them all. "Niel, I think your time in this team is over." Niel shot his head up, but not being able to make eye contact. "You can't do that."
A humorless laugh escaped from Jasper's lips. "Oh, but I can. The team agrees and I think when I bring it up to the coach he would agree as well."
"Not everybody agrees," Lucas interjected. Everybody turned to him. "Niel just had a bad game, as we all have had, that is not a justifiable reason to kick him off the team."
The two teammates stood close in front of one another. Holding a silent staring contest. Jasper slowly came forward and steered deep down into Lucas' eyes, showing his dominance. "I disagree, Niel was the former captain, he knows better. He can do better. And today he showed he is either not capable or not willing to play better."
Niel gulped. He didn't like confrontations, he didn't want to step up. He just wanted to play but it was indeed not his day, or so he thought. What Niel didn't know was that a form of destiny was messing with his soccer skills during the game.
Right then, Mr. Williams entered the locker room, taking sight of what was happening. "What's going on here?" Coach asked Jasper.
The captain cleared his voice and straightened his back. "I – no we – believe that Niel isn't capable anymore to be on this team. He dragged us all down coach." The bulky man took off his cap and made his way to Niel. He sighed.
"Niel... I know you had a rough year. But I have to get these boys to the finals and- and you are not really helping us getting there. You are already a senior so I don't want to kick you off the team, but you will be benched for the next two games, meaning you will be there just for show... You don't have to show up for practice anymore." And with that, Mr. Williams walked away with a heavy heart.
The coach had hoped he could help that kid get a scholarship but it seemed that was no longer possible. Mr. Williams knew for sure his father, Peter Johnson, would come to visit him, trying to convince him otherwise. But the man truly believed that Niel was still affected by everything that happened to the teenage boy and Mr. Williams wasn't a man with patience for trauma or any other mental stuff.
Niel didn't know how to react. He was angry, frustrated, and maybe even sad, but he mostly felt numb. For years had Niel been a part of the soccer team. He first started during middle school and continued during high school.
To stunned to speak Niel just took his stuff with him and left the locker room without a word.
When he came home his father was waiting for him. Niel didn't want to deal with him too. After Jasper and his coach, he had enough lectures for the day. So while his father ranted about how bad he had played, Niel just tried to zone out. Not wanting to hear any of it. Dissociating himself from the situation.
But the worst had yet to come.
"So, what did ye coach say about all of this, huh?"
Niel took a long breath in and out before he had to break the bad news. "I am benched for the rest of the season." His words were just above a whisper.
"Ye are what?!" Peter growled out.
A silence fell, the only sound that was heard was Niel's dad heavy breathing. "Ye are useless, ya know that?! Just like him, just a waste of space. Why can nobody in this house be fucking useful?" With those final words, Peter stormed off.
Niel was too tired. A long heavy sigh left him. This was officially one of the worst days of his life. He sat down on the couch and let his head fall into his hands. This was supposed to be a fun time. Niel's birthday was coming up, his team was close to finals and graduation came up. It felt almost like last year.
Camilla saw her boy struggling and had a strong desire to comfort her son. Just as she came up to him Niel stood up. "Oh-uh goodnight mom." He gave her a small kiss on the cheek and left to go up to his room.
The next day an uncomfortable tension could be felt in the Anderson family home. Everybody was quiet at the breakfast table and they all left in silence when going to church. It was hard to be there for Niel. Most of the parents of his teammates went to the same church as his family did. Whispers were heard around him making Niel anxious. Slowly he started to scratch his arms.
Arabella did want to make a remark about their rude behavior if it wasn't for her difficult relationship with her older brother. Certain events made her angry at him, at a level that would last for eternity. So, she let him suffer.
When the church was over Niel needed a break from everything and announced once again he would go on a run. "Of course, run away from ye problems as usual," Peter muttered. "Ye know, if I were ya I would have begged my coach until he would let me play again. Even if that meant kneelin' outside all night."
"Peter please-" Camilla tried but was silenced by one stare from her husband.
"Go, I don't want to see ye anyway." And with that Niel went on another run. Making his way to his little getaway. Once there he didn't want to turn back yet. He ran further around the lake, going only deeper and deeper into the forest, putting more distance between him and his hometown.
The cool breeze coming from the lake, the warmth of the sun, and the earthy smell of the forest brought Niel into a relaxing state he hadn't experienced for a while. A small smile appeared on his face. All his problems disappeared and peace came to his mind.
That was until his foot got stuck behind a rock and Niel fell full speed with his face down. Slowly he saw how his surroundings became blurry and before he knew it everything went black.
A/N: if you want to read any further you can on my Patreon (until chapter 5 is uploaded there).
Thanks for reading and have a nice day or night!