Arianna
"Where was dad at that time?", I asked.
Theo stiffened and didn't say anything for a while.
"Dad was busy with work.", he said in an emotionless voice and his face turned blank.
"What work?", I asked with a frown.
"He was busy with business, Aria.", he said calmly but his face has gone extremely blank and I'm unable to read his emotions.
"Business? But he should have been with you guys after mom's death. Instead Vince was there but dad wasn't?", I asked, my frown deepening.
What kind of reason is that?
How can dad be busy with his work when mom just died?
I mean I understand his work is important but is it that important to leave his kids when they needed him the most?
"Yeah.", Theo said.
"I don't want to offend your feelings and neither am I blaming anyone, but is it not unfair to leave the responsibility of five kids to a 12 year old boy?", I asked hesitantly.
I don't want to anger Theo by giving an impression that I'm blaming dad. I don't know the situation so I shouldn't judge. But it is totally unfair for a 12 year kid to take up such a huge responsibility.
"You can express your views without any hesitance, princess.", Theo said and his voice once again went gentle.
"You didn't answer my question, Theo.", I said and it took so much courage.
Theo chuckled.
"I like it when you are bold. And about your question, yes it is unfair to leave such huge responsibility on a kid, but dad felt it justified by appointing a nanny for us.", he said and at the end his voice went a little bitter.
"So, did the nanny not fulfill her job properly that Vince had to step in?", I asked.
"It's not about whether nanny did her job or not.", he chuckled.
"Even before mom died, Vince was very protective about us. And after she was gone, he involved more into the things related to us and tried to make us feel home. No. He did make us feel home.", he said with a small smile.
I didn't say anything and stared straight at nothing in particular.
I can't really justify dad's actions. He was supposed to be there with them the way Vince was. He was supposed to do all that Vince has done.
Why did he thought leaving the kids who just lost their mom with a nanny is justified?
"Vince has sacrificed a lot in the process of raising us, Aria. But never once did he make us feel like a burden. Because for Vince, we are not just a responsibility. We are his family and so are you. We are always there to listen when you need to share something. So never hesitate to share anything with us.", he said softly, looking at me.
I gave him a small smile and nodded.
I know Theo is talking about my past, but I'm not ready to share everything yet. I still need time.
We then talked about lighter topics after that and the day ended normally.
A few weeks later.
A few weeks have passed since I started living with my siblings and everything is going pretty normal.
In the past few weeks, my brothers have tried to talk to me more and we spent good time together.
Ash and I share a weird bond but it is always exciting to rile him up. He gets grumpy when he is angry and that encourages me to rile him up a little more.
Once, Ash and I started arguing about a topic that doesn't even matter and Dylan, Ace and Angel were just watching us and enjoying our argument. They didn't even try to stop. Finally, Theo had to step in and end the argument.
It's always been like that these past weeks with Ash and me arguing about anything and everything. But it's fun to argue with him as he gets annoyed over the smallest of the things.
Ace and I have grown more closer. We talk very freely with each other. I don't hold back when I'm talking to him. I don't have to think twice before saying something to him. Also, he buys me a lot of ice cream.
Well, my relationship with Dylan has changed too. We used to be strangers before but after Vince asked us to spend a whole day together, we kind of started speaking to each other and I realized that he is the most annoying of all the brothers.
Dylan is ignorant to everyone. He doesn't really be soft like Ace nor grumpy like Ash. He is just always ignorant. No wonder Angel always try to irritate him and it's quite funny to see him getting riled up.
I am closest to Theo among all my brothers. He is just too sweet. But he doesn't like me calling him sweet. He says his male ego would be bruised.
Men and their ego!
Now, coming to Vince, I understood Vince doesn't show much emotion to anyone and keeps stoic with everyone. Though, Dylan and Ash also have blank expressions all the time, Vince is on a whole other level.
No one tries to rile up Vince though! That is the last thing anyone wants to do.
Just like Theo said, Vince really gets to know everything even without anyone telling him. I was surprised when he managed to understand my emotions without me verbalizing it.
Few days after I told Vince and Theo about my past, Vince wanted me to meet a psychiatrist to help me with my trauma and anxiety issues. At first, I didn't like the idea. I didn't want to share my feeling and emotions with an unknown person but Theo somehow convinced me.
The psychiatrist is a woman in her early thirties, Kaylee Stevens. She always has a gentle smile on her face and exudes a very warm aura.
The first time I went to meet her, I greeted her politely but didn't speak anything further. She tried to make small talk with me but I just stared at her and didn't answer.
The first few times, I didn't speak anything but then she convinced me to talk saying she is a stranger who doesn't have any relationship with me and that it doesn't matter if she knows how I feel. Also she convinced me saying I should start fighting my past and start to embrace the present openly and completely.
Somehow, her constant persuasion and immense patience has helped me to open up slowly. I didn't exactly tell her about what happened in the past but she talks to me about my current state of mind and my feelings towards my family.
She once asked me about my past, but I didn't speak anything about it. So, as of now, things are going slowly.
Vince seems pleased with my progress. He too helped me in letting go of my reluctance to open up and speak to a therapist.
But, he is not happy about Angelina's progress. It seems like there is no progress at all. She is attending the same psychiatrist as mine. But, she seems to be more uptight about her feelings and Vince doesn't seem happy about it.
I don't know what exactly happened in her past but I think it is about the incident with her friend or rather her friend's parents. I also feel there is more to it than just that.
But, in the period of these past weeks, Angelina and I have become more closer. I can now call her my sister. The first time when I talked to her, I hoped we could at least come to be good friends but now we are not just best friends but sisters too.
We always stick to each other and do all the stuff together. There are a few things we don't share with each other but apart from that we bonded really well. Though we have different interests and tastes, we got really close.
I'm sitting with Angelina in some of the classes we share. The first time, I went to sit with her, she said she is okay and that I should go and sit with my friends. But, I didn't listen to her and sat with her.
We got some weird stares but I just ignored them. Since then, I started sitting with her in some classes. But at lunch, Angel asked me to sit with my friends and refused to come sit with me and my friends.
I understood her reluctance and didn't force her further. She is still very much reluctant to make friends. I hope Kaylee helps her with it.
Right now, I'm on my bed reading a book and Angelina is sketching something, lying on my bed on her stomach.
"Angel", I called her and she hummed.
"Leah invited me for a sleepover.", I said and and she stiffened.
She looked at me with a frown.
"I wanted to ask if you would like to join us.", I said and she sighed.
"Thanks for asking but I can't and even you shouldn't go.", she said seriously and I frowned.
"Why?", I asked.
She sat up and looked at me seriously.
"It is not safe, Anna.", she said and my frown deepened.
"We aren't going to go out. We will just spend our time in Leah's house.", I said.
"It is not safe. You can't trust them so easily.", she said looking away.
"They are my friends, Angel.", I said seriously.
I am happy she is concerned about me but I trust my friends and also I do understand that whatever happened to her has left a deep rooted doubt in her.
"I know, Anna.", she said and sighed.
"But you have to understand that sometimes situations force people to act in a certain way. And it is really not safe to stay in someone else's house.", she said looking at me.
"But we can't stop living because of the doubt. We will always end up being miserable.", I said looking at her and she looked away.
"We will. But isn't it better to endure some loneliness rather than bearing the consequences of a wrong judgement.", she said looking straight at nothing in particular.
"We will never be truly happy if we let doubt always cloud our mind. You should let go of it, Angel.", I said and sighed.
"I don't want you to go, Anna. You can think of me as a coward or a selfish person, but I don't want you to go.", she said seriously looking at me and I frowned.
"I already told them, I will ask Vince and try to convince him. And moreover, they are my first set of friends and I want to experience all those things that I have just heard and never done.", I said seriously.
She looked at me and opened her mouth to say something, but then didn't say anything and started to continue her sketch.
I sighed at her frowning face and constant biting of her lips. She wasn't drawing anything. In fact, she was spoiling what she has already drawn.
"I will be fine, Angel.", I said after sometime but she didn't reply.
"You better be.", she said firmly after a few minutes.
I smiled and hugged her but she just turned her face away nonchalantly. I laughed at her.
Sulking Angelina is so cute!
Soon, it was dinner time and we went and started our dinner. Halfway through the dinner, I decided it is the best time to ask Vince for permission.
"Vince", I called him and he looked at me.
Okay. You can do it Arianna!
"My friend Leah invited me for a sleepover.", I said and he just stared at me with a blank face.
It is really hard to read Vince's reaction.
"You are not going.", Dylan said before Vince could say anything.
I frowned and looked at him.
"Why not?", I asked.
"Because your friends are strangers.", he said and my frown deepened.
"They are my friends. They are not strangers.", I said firmly.
He just can't disrespect my friends that way.
"Whatever. You are not going.", he said nonchalantly and I felt like punching him.
"It's better to not go, princess.", Theo said and I looked at him surprised.
Theo, generally, accepts to anything Angelina and I say or ask. Then why is he supporting Dylan now!
"Why, Theo?", I asked looking at him.
"Because it is not safe, Aria.", he said firmly and it is the first time Theo used that tone on me.
"Theo is right, Aria. You shouldn't go.", Ace added and I'm getting angry each passing second.
Why is everyone against this idea?
Ash didn't say anything, but his expression makes it clear that he is not happy about me going for a sleepover either. And Angelina is already displeased.
But, I am not able to read Vince's thoughts. Why does this man have to have such control on his expressions!
"Vince", I probed looking at him, ignoring the others.
"I refuse to permit you for a sleepover at others' house.", Vince stated calmly and the others relaxed.
"But why?", I asked and anyone can clearly sense a hint of anger in my voice.
"It is not safe.", he said calmly.
"Why is everyone saying the same thing? They are my friends and not some random strangers. I want to go, Vince.", I said exasperatedly and Vince just stared at me calmly.
For a while no one spoke anything and I'm starting to get anxious.
Did I upset Vince?
Is he angry?
"You can call them over to our house.", Vince said after a while.
"But they already planned everything.", I said and it almost sounded like I was whining.
"I will give you two choices, Arianna. Either you call them over to our house or there will be a bodyguard standing outside the room you stay in at you friend's house.", Vince stated calmly but firmly.
I frowned.
"But-", I started but Theo cut me off.
"Choose one of the options, Aria.", Theo said firmly.
I bit my lip and continued eating without saying anything.
I can't ruin my friends' sleepover. They have already planned out everything. Also I don't want to make them uncomfortable with a bodyguard always standing at the door of the room.
I felt sad, angry and disappointed right now. I don't know on whom to show my anger and I just kept eating faster so that I can just go to my room.
After eating dinner, I stood up and walked away. I went to my room and I couldn't control it any longer and tears started flowing from my eyes.
The inability to show my anger and disappointment is converted to tears. I slept on my bed and controlled myself.
After a while, Theo walked into my room but I pretended to be asleep.
He sat beside me on the bed and gently stroked my hair.
"It is not safe to stay in someone else's house, princess. I hope you understand.", he said gently stroking my hair.
He did that for some more minutes and sighed. He kissed my forehead, wished me a good night and walked away.
I opened my eyes and kept staring at the ceiling.
Why can't I do the most basic things the other teenagers do?
It was just a sleepover. Why can't they allow it?
Why can't they understand that I want to experience all those things I always wanted to do but never had a chance to?
Do I not deserve a normal teenage?
*************************************************************************
Here's the next chapter!
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Yours lovingly,
Author.