Anthony came to visit me later that day. Till then, I was all alone. I waited for someone, anyone to visit me to distract me, but no one came until that evening when Anthony did.
I was more grateful for his presence than I could ever be. I had almost fallen asleep out of boredom. But the thoughts didn't let me sleep. There was just something about being lonely that kept me up.
But right before I went mad, Anthony stepped in.
And I wished it was a pleasant conversation.
It wasn't.
I ended up in tears, with my fears dancing in all their glory and I cursed my brother with all I had.
He couldn't keep my secret.
He had spilled all of it to Anthony.
And now, my boyfriend was feeling insecure cause I hadn't told him that I was dying. And worse, I hadn't told him i was a Wiccan.
Truth be told, I had often imagined what telling him the truth about myself would go as. Not the dying truth, no, the Wiccan truth.
Sometimes I had imagined it going perfect. Like he would take my hands in his and tell me that he loved me as I was.
The other times I had imagined him breaking up with me and calling me some mean things or a psycho.
It went worse.
He was in tears.
And so was I.
I, cause I was scared of what he would do.
He, for he was scared of what would happen to me.
Nothing was going as planned.
In my head, I was screaming that this wasn't going as it should've. This wasn't going as it could've. This wasn't going as it would've if I had told him myself.
But it was too late. It was already happening. After releasing a string of accusations at me, he sighed and let tears fall from his eyes. He left my room, shutting the door loudly behind him and I sunk back into my bed, and let sleep retake me.
Sorry guys, my cous's wedding, so I was stuck without my laptop and I don't have a phone so I couldn't update. Really sorry. I forgot to tell you guys. I promise to update regularly now.
Yours truly,
Janushi