JOHN B HAD GONE TO SHOUPE EARLIER. Initially, when he told me, I celebrated as well but now that I sit next to Sarah, I feel bad. A sad look on her face makes me move over to her. "I wish they could find Weston. My mom told Shoupe what happened. How he was on the island. Ward and him are both murderers," I pick at the couch cushion. "Probably because Ward is more powerful," Bailey says as she walks out with a glass full of some sort of alcohol.
That's probably why. Sadly. "Do you regret it?" Kie asks Sarah. "No. He deserves all of it. And I know that." I rub at her back hoping it comforts her. "He's your dad, I get it. I'm sure it sucks to be in the middle," Kie quietly says. I hear Sarah's phone ringing. "Who is it?" I lean over her shoulder and when I see it's Topper, I audibly gag. "Sorry," She whispers to us and gets up to take the call. Kie and Bailey look to me. I mouth, Topper and they both roll their eyes.
I watch as Sarah's body language changes. She shutters a bit and puts her head down. The boys shout in victory as Bailey walks back into the room. Sarah hangs up, "W—We need to go," She panics. I jump up from the couch, "Sarah? What's happening?" Kie shouts for the others as Sarah makes a b-line for the van. "Sarah! Yo!" I catch up to her and grab her shoulder.
"They're arresting my dad. We have to go!" She roughly swings the van door open. The others runs out of the house and John B quickly starts the van. My heart pounds against my chest as I get in next to JJ. The tension has eased slightly between us since our civil interaction yesterday. John B speeds through the streets and suddenly there's cop cars right in front of us with their sirens blaring. "Shit..." Kie whispers.
"Oh my God. Can you please hurry? I need to be there for Wheezie," Sarah panics. "Yeah, please, John B," I nod. I push myself towards JJ in hopes he'll get the hint I want him to give me some sort of comfort right now. "You think I wanna miss this?" I glare at John B's insensitivity towards Sarah. We stop right in front of the house and I immediately swing the van door open. We all get against the stone wall in front of the house. There's cops—everywhere. "Holy shit," Sarah curses.
JJ and Pope argue next to me about how neither one of them can see and I roll my eyes. "If one of you pushes me, I'm killing you," Bailey glares at them.
"Screw it. I'm going over," John B hops over the cold stone wall. "Right behind you," JJ crouches down and helps us over the wall then hops over right after us. "Where's Wheezie?" Sarah and I look at each other with panic. "There! Girls, right there!" JJ points towards her and Sarah and I run over. "Wheezie! Wheezie!" Sarah runs and hugs her first. I can hear the heartbreaking questions Wheezie spits out at her big sister.
I can feel the lump in my throat when I see the sadness on Wheezie's face. JJ laces his fingers with mine and I squeeze back. The argument can be ignored. None of us have any idea to what is going on.
The youngest Cameron runs back into the house. I can hear Shoupe yelling in the distance. "He's on The Druthers! Sarah!" I grab her arm and point. "Let's go! We have to go!" We run to the dock. I let go of JJ and moved my hand down to Sarah's so now we're hand in hand. The closer we get, the more cops there are. "Dad!" Sarah cries out as we jog down the dock. We put our hands up as we walk through the line of cops.
"That's Sarah Cameron! Let her through!" Shoupe yells. When I finally get through the line, I see Ward on the highest deck of the My Druthers.
"What are you doing here, Sarah?" Ward yells down to his daughter. "Dad! What are you doing?" Sarah is crying already, I can tell by the strain in her voice.
"Vic! You gotta get her out of here! She can't be here right now!" That doesn't mean anything fucking good.
"Just come on in, and you can talk to her!" Shoupe tries to reason. "Sarah, I'm so sorry, baby. I can't!"
I have no idea how to react right now. There's so much chaos around us. Everyone shouts as he pulls the anchor up. "What are you doing? Dad, no, no!" Sarah desperately cries out.
"JJ, JJ," I smack his chest, "The hell is happening?" I ask as if he'd know. "I don't know—I don't, baby," He wraps his arms around me and I just take it in. "Ward, this ain't gonna end the way you want it to!" Shoupe yells.
He's gonna kill himself to get out of the punishment of being a murderer. What a pussy.
Cop boats sound their alarms. "You don't need her seeing this!" Shoupe is trying everything to get Ward down. The lump in my throat gets tighter as Sarah cries out for her dad even more.
"I love you!" Ward shouts as he climbs down the latter. Goosebumps spread all over my body. Sarah and Shoupe continue to yell at Ward Cameron. Grasping for straws to get him to back out of this.
"JJ, he's gonna kill himself," I whisper, trying not to let the tightness in my throat break. "I know," He pulls me tighter. As much as I don't want to admit it, everything Ward has done has hurt. I grew up with the Cameron's. Watching them become monsters was something I never expected when I was 10 and first met the girl in front of me. When I first met the man on the boat in front of me.
I'm hurting more for Sarah though and whatever she is about to witness.
Ward goes into the boat as Sarah continues to cry out.
BOOM
In a matter of seconds, there's a loud boom that erupts on the lowest level of the boat. Fire flying out of every exit of the boat as it explodes even more. JJ holds my body closer as the boat explodes where Ward is. The flames are so big you can feel them on the dock. They reflect off the water and cause an orange hue on my friends faces when I look towards them.
The top of the boat completely explodes and I shield my face from heat that grows warmer. Debris flies everywhere and lands all over the water. I crouch in hopes I don't get hit by a piece.
The dock shakes beneath me as black smoke fills the air. Flames right below it. I push myself away from JJ when I hear Sarah gasping for breath. "No, no!" Her voice breaks, "Dad! Dad!" The boat is basically completely gone. The bottom level is the only thing left.
Sarah keeps gasping for air as she starts to fall to the ground. I immediately catch her before she can hit the dock alone. She cries out which makes me start to cry with her, for her. I pull her head into my chest, trying to shield her from the burnt boat. I can see Topper running down the dock and I expect to see John B holding her as well or at least comforting her but he does nothing. I hold her closer and then Topper comes and rubs her back gently.
Sarah reaches her hand out for something, anything and I choke out a sob again. "Sarah, honey, I'm so sorry," I whisper to her. Topper and I both hold her, not John B. But her fucking ex which makes me glare at John B. Her sobs rack her whole body and all I can do is pull her closer and run my fingers through her hair. Watching as my best friend falls apart in my arms. I feel useless.
The chaos of the cops die out and I can only hear her cries and my own. I feel a set of hands on me and for a quick second, I think it's John B coming to comfort his girlfriend but as soon as I feel the coldness of rings, I know it's JJ.
After a few minutes of Sarah crying, she is seeming to get tired as her body becomes weaker in my arms. "Topper, I got her, it's fine," I shoo him off. "Sam—"
"Not the time to argue Topper. Walk away," JJ says to him. He hesitates again. "Topper, I got her," There's no harshness in my tone because it really isn't the time to argue. I will argue with John B later though. Topper nods and walks away and down the dock.
I can still hear the quiet sobs out of Sarah. I let go of her a bit and moved the hair from her tear stained face.
"Hey, Sarah, I'm sorry," I hold her face in my hands. More tears stream down her face as she falls into my body. I look up at my friends around me. All sympathetic looks towards our blonde friend. "Can you get up, honey?" The affectionate name coming out of nowhere. I almost surprise myself with it. "I—I—" She stutters out but I shush her, rubbing at her back again. I see John B crouch down on the other side of Sarah but she glares at him.
"Sarah, I'm so sorry," It's almost like he forced himself to say it. All she does is swallow and nod at him. "I'm going to help you up, Sarah," I slowly move my body out from under her. Bailey grabs her hands and gently pulls her up and into a hug which Sarah gladly falls into.
JJ wraps an arm around my waist from behind and pulls me into his chest so that my back is against it. "You okay?" He whispers. "Don't worry about me, please," I move his arm and go back to Sarah when Bailey lets her go. "Do you want me to go with you?" I ask her as I pull her into my side and help her down the dock. "Yeah, please, please, Sam," She goes to turn around and I don't know whether it was to look at the boat or John B but either way I move her head forward. I don't want her to see the boat again.
The walk down the dock feels like everyone's eyes are on us. Well, maybe because they are. Every cop with a sympathetic look is such bullshit. This could've been avoided if they arrested him sooner.
I shield her face with my hand as we all reach the grass and then to her back door. I let her go, "You want me to go in with you?" She shakes her head no and wipes away more tears, "I gotta explain to Wheezie—what just happened—"
"You don't have to do it alone," Kie says. "No—I do." I can see her swallow back a sob. Her legs wobble a bit and I get ready to catch her but she catches herself. "Do you want me in there?" John B steps forward. "No—I want to be alone," John B steps back, almost offended as Sarah enters the house without him.
"All she wanted was her husband and all you did was stand there, John B!" I yell at him in the backyard. A day after the incident, it's all the island can talk about. I don't blame them. It's all we can talk about. I've been arguing with John B since we got back yesterday.
"He killed my dad! Am I not supposed to be happy? If it was your dad, you'd be celebrating with me. Speaking of, where is he? He needs to be next!" John B stomps around with a beer in hand. "Sarah didn't grow up with the dad I did, JB! She loved her dad! I understand you get to be happy that he's dead, okay? I'm happy he's dead but I still comforted Sarah!" He starts to walk away from me but I follow him.
"I didn't know how to react, Sam!" He throws his hands in the air as we reach the dock. In the distance I can see Bailey with her head on Kie's shoulder. It's like they're not even hiding it anymore.
"None of us did! But she's your wife, apparently! So you comfort her!" Is it really that hard to understand?
"I tried! She wouldn't let me!"
"Because you did it after the fact! After I had sat there holding her, with Topper might I add!" The others sigh at the arguing. It's been going on for a whole 24 hours.
John B doesn't say anything as he slumps into the HMS Pogue. "John B—"
"Sam, come on," JJ steps in front of me. "Come on what, JJ?" I throw my hands on my hips. "Don't tell me you're still mad at me!" He quickly realizes and I push past him. "Yea! I am!"
"Why? I'm sorry, okay?" He pleads. My eyes shift over to Bailey and Kie who seem unbothered by the argument.
While I'm scared I'm losing JJ, Bailey and Kie were blindly falling in love. Whether either one of them realizes the looks they give each other or that touches that are needed but unneeded, they were falling in love and Pope noticed it too.
I turn towards him and follow his eyes that stay on the two girls. A look of sorrow all over his face.
Maybe I'm losing JJ because I expect too much from him but we've been together for almost a year and have been best friends for 4 of those years. He should know I want a proper apology. "I'm worried about Sarah right now, JJ. We can discuss this later," I walk away from him. Even if I miss being in his presence. Him holding me yesterday made the butterflies that I missed come back. Or maybe it was my stomach turning at the event. I can't tell these days.
I walk up next to Pope. JJ starts fishing to pass the quiet time. "Never seen anyone blow themselves up like that," Pope says. "Cross that one off the bucket list!"
"JJ!" Kie and I both scold him. I know he's trying to joke to make light of the situation but it's not working. Kie walks past Pope and I and down the dock to John B who is slumped like a sad puppy in the boat. "Sucks for Sarah," JJ says. "Have you called her, Sam?" Bailey asks with her back turned towards me. She somehow finds JJ fishing interesting. "Yeah, no reply. I'm just worried sick," I hug myself and rub my arms up and down. Chills run all over my body as Sarah's screams replay in my head. The heat of the boat. The drop of my heart when it exploded.
The feeling of JJ hugging me.
I hold myself tighter and look down at the dock below me. "Hey, you okay? I know you hate Ward but, you still grew up with him around," Pope's question brings an odd smile to my face.
The sun makes me squint a bit as I look at Pope, "I think I'm fine?" It comes out more like a question rather than an actual answer. He just nods in response. It's quiet. No one really knows what to say. It's almost like everything is wrong to say in this situation.
I push myself off the railing, "Hey, I think I'm gonna go home. I have to check on my mom. She's the one that really grew up with Ward."
Everyone looks at me but JJ's eyes stay on me longer than the others. "Want me to go with you?" He looks like he regrets the question as soon as he says it. "No—She's my mom. I'll be back tonight," I shake my head and leave the backyard and go to my skateboard.
I haven't skated in a long time. It's been so long I actually left my skateboard here and found it last night in John B's garage. I flip it over and cringe at the shitty design on it. I got this thing when I was 15 and JJ insisted on teaching me. I was too scared to even lift my foot up but eventually, with the help of JJ's encouragement. I did it.
I place the skateboard in the street and kick off, like I've actually been using it the past 6 months.
"JJ, what if I die!" He effortlessly skates back to me. "Sam, you're not gonna die," Pope tries to calm me down. "Look," JJ gets off his board, "Even Pope thinks you'll be okay!"
"You can both go fuck yourselves!" My nerves are getting the best of me. "Jesus, Sam. Just kick off!" John B rips the board out of JJ's hands and does it as effortlessly as JJ did. It looks fine until neither one of my feet are on the ground. "Hey, I'll catch you. I'm not gonna let you bust your ass!" JJ rubs at my shoulders from behind. "I don't believe you," I shrug him off.
"Woah!" My body hits the ground, "Shit!" I can hear my skateboard roll away from me. I give up. I'm so tired. How do I keep falling off my fucking uses of transportation? I roll onto my back in the middle of the street. Maybe I should get up. The last time I didn't, Weston decided to attack me.
I open my limbs so I'm on the street in a starfish position. Rocks dig into my skin but at this point, do I really give a shit? Everything is going to shit. I'm losing JJ because I keep pushing him away. He's trying and I know that but I cannot afford to lose JJ so when he says it doesn't matter—it fucks me up.
My hair is probably getting so dirty.
I push myself up on my elbows. Where's my skateboard? I squint and see it in the distance on someone's lawn. I squint even harder. Fuck, it's Ava's house. Hopefully she's out with the bitch squad. "Ugh!" I groan as I get to my feet. No major injuries that I can feel. My wound didn't reopen. My mom still doesn't know about that run in the bullet. Let's hope I have no reason to wear a bikini for a while.
"I'm such a dumbass. How many times am I gonna bust my ass?" My sneakers hit Ava's grass. This is reminding me of the movie The Monster House except it's The Traitors House. I grab my board. I'll just walk the rest of the way.
ZIP
My head snaps up towards Ava's living room window. There she stands, the curtains around her like I can't see her. I expect to be cursed at or something but she does nothing except close the curtains. I freeze, surprised for a second. I don't have the time to ponder what her intentions are. My feet hit the street again as I start the long walk home.
"Mom?" I shout through the house as I push the front door open. "Anyone?"
Marcus emerges from around the corner. "Hey, Marcus!" My heart gets ten times bigger at the sight of my little brother. I go up to him and hug him even though I know he hates it. "Is mom okay?" Marcus sends me a confused look, "She's fine. You thought Ward's death affected her? She's going around the house saying he's not dead! She's fine! They're just drinking wine in the backyard," Marcus points at Brandon, Justin and our mom. They are just giggling on the tanning chairs. "The hell?" I stomp past my brother and open the back doors.
"Sam? Oh my, God!" My mom places her wine glass down and runs up to me and engulfs me in an unexpected hug. I accept it but stare at Brandon and Justin who just shrug. "So, you're okay?" I ask her. "I feel worse knowing he's not actually dead," She pulls back and smiles. "Rachel, let it go. The girl has enough on her plate. You okay?" Brandon asks.
"Yeah. I'm fine. Sarah and Wheezie aren't," I walk towards the boys and steal Justin's wine glass for a sip. All he does is gasp though. "Well, I imagine so," Brandon sips from his glass. "Why aren't you with the crew?" Justin takes his glass back. "So much shit. JJ and I are fighting and now John B and I are. It's a mess and too much for me to explain," I throw my hands up. I really don't want to explain it all, I might start sobbing.
"Sam, I want you to know that Shoupe said he's searching the whole island for Weston. And, I know how you feel about him and I have my—opinions—as well but, don't give him shit for it. He's trying!" My mom pleads with me not to start trouble. I spin the rings around my fingers. Weston's fist impacting my face comes back very clearly.
"Yeah, okay. I'm going inside now," I drag my feet inside. Marcus is no longer there.
Y'know, I'm starting to miss that damn gun being here. I could truly kill Weston the next time I see him. That night I shot a bullet in the floor, I hoped it would somehow hit him or for him to just give me more of a reason to shoot him. When I reach the top of the steps, I don't go to my room. I quietly walk past the guest room that Vanessa is currently in and into Brandon and Justin's room.
These two have to have a weapon. Not just a stupid pocket knife—a true fucking weapon. Brandon is more likely to have a weapon so I rummage through his closet. Opening boxes rapidly and finding shit I definitely shouldn't. There's nothing of weapon like form I can fucking take. Not even a screwdriver.
"Wow, this is bullshit!" I scoff and go to leave the closet. "Ah!" I look down as my foot smacks into a box. I don't think I opened this one. I lean down and grab the box. It's just a normal shoebox. Just some probably ugly tennis shoes. I shake the box a bit.
That does not sound like shoes. There's like, one thing in here.
I take the top off the box. My mouth lets out a loud gasp. My hands grip around it and I try to push down the smirk as I pick it up. It's like the universe heard me and gave me a chance!
I move the pistol around in my hand. It's just a normal black gun. Nothing special. I have no idea how to use this thing. I can't even check if it's loaded because I'm scared to do something.
I carefully place it back in the box and just opt to take the whole box with me. Their door is slightly cracked open so I use my foot to open it even more. I speed walk to my room and slam my door behind me.
My hands very carefully slip out from under the box as I place it on my bed. On the flattest section of it. "Holy shit!" I wanna hold it again.
I carefully grab the gun from the box again. See, I'm actually scared of guns. Unlike JJ, I don't pose with it when I don't even know if it's in safety.
I move it in my hand again. It's heavier than JJ's was.
"Yo, Sam—" My door hits the wall as Blake and Vanessa barge in. Both their jaws drop and so does mine when I realize the gun is still in my hand. Blake drops his phone from his hands, "Sam? What the hell?! I was gonna ask if you wanted to get weed and you have a gun?" Blake shuffles in and closes the door. I quickly place the gun back in the box. "Who's is it? Oh—this is why I'm up your ass about things!" Vanessa tries to grab the box from behind me but I push her away.
"You didn't see shit!"