I can recall a time
When I would walk through the downtown of this city
And I would marvel at it
The pavement
The lights
The overall structure
Was nothing like I was used to
The city was a magical place of possibility
Grass looked greener
The trees looked fuller
The air
Still filled with exhaust
But had bluer sky mixed with it
Every Thursday
The wonder of the city
Made my brain dance
Now that I'm older
I can see the cracked pavement under my feet
Crushed cigarette butts
Garbage
Green grass now a dull brown
Sky is gray
Trees dying
And the shadows getting thicker
I didn't notice the shadows before
Or
If I did notice them
I didn't think much of them
And the traffic
Hell's highway in one city
Endlessly zooming and honking and swearing
Destined to keep traveling nowhere
Except everywhere all at once
I can recall
What the city felt like to me
Those early days when it was all new and wonderful
I hold onto those days
Dearly
Because the adult in me knows
Those days are never coming back