{su¡cide mentioned}
"Please don't kill yourself, y/n. I need you. Your sister needs you. We'll do anything for you to be happy again. I don't want to lose a daughter. Please, y/n." I could hear my mom begging from afar. "I took the step, mom. I can't get back." – "Yes you can, my dear. Just come down from that height." I could hear her steps. Tears were falling again. "I'm sorry mom." One step forward or one step back? This could choose my fate. Death or life. What should I choose?
I don't know.
"Do you really want to give her all the power? By giving up? No darling you can do this. I know. Take a step back. Please, y/n." – "Mom! Stop for a second. Please." Where did my voice go? Why am I crying when I think this is the decision I need to make? Will I be happy when I die? What if I won't? What's the point then? I want to be happy again. I don't want to get hurt anymore. Be scared to live. Hide myself. I'm sick. But is it worth it?
"I'm sorry mom," I said again and ran into her arms.
- - -
"No!" I opened my eyes seeing nothing else rather than my room. "I never tried to kill myself. Why did I dream this?" Single tears fell out of my eyes. "What?" What did I just dream? What happened? I don't understand a thing though I'm trying.
Minutes passed and I was still thinking about it. What time is it?
As my desk clock said, it was 5 am. In the middle of the night.
"Fuck, I'm hot." Quickly I opened my window seeing the garden with tons of fairy lights that we hung up yesterday. I smiled again thinking about yesterday.
[Yesterday]
"Hurry, give me the lights." – "Stop blinding me with the lights!" – "Ouhhhhh I'm blinded by the lights!" – "Shut up Jake." – "Leave my Jakey alone." – "Excuse me? I knew him earlier than you" – "But I know him better" – "Exactly!" – "But I am his roommate" – "I know him the best. Now go back to work, it's getting dark." Sunghoon stopped up from discussing and gave me the lights.
"Should we play karaoke? It's such a nice weather and the lights look perfect." We were all sitting in the garden on the blanket and just vibing in the middle of the night. "I'm in! Sunoo let's be a team!" I went to him. "And what about me?" Jake dramatically said. "Oh no! Sunoo I'm sorry I'm going to him." I went back to Jake. "Hyung don't worry I'm on your team." Ni-ki went to Sunoo and the others played too.
We were singing karaoke for two hours of something when our neighbor came and complained. He complained two times and we didn't care but when he started to blackmail us with the police we went in and played there.
"Okay, I'm done with karaoke," Heeseung said as he drank his water. "Me too." I joined him and just fell on the sofa.
It was very quiet when suddenly Jungwon yawned and everyone looked at him. "What? I'm tired." – "Same." – "Same, I'm gonna go." Sunghoon said and stretched. "Good night, boys" I smiled and waved bye to them.
The other boys and I were still chilling in the living room talking about things when I got very sleepy and fell asleep.
[End of flashback]
It got very cold in front of the window so I just closed it and took my phone.
"Oh?" I looked at my Instagram feed "Jake posted a picture? From us? He didn't even tell me." I mumbled when I liked it and texted him.
Yun <8
Jakeyyyy
You didn't tell me that you would post that picture
But it's cute
Thanks
Sleep tight <3
°°°
I started reading the news because it was very interesting what people have written about us.
There was quite a few news but I cared more about what the reaction of other people was.
Most of them were nice but some of them threw hate which was very sad. But not everyone is happy with themselves so they easily get jealous. That's what my mom always told me.
Right! Mom!
Mama <3
Hey mom!
It's been a long time we talked :/
I miss you :'(
Hey love!!
You didn't even tell me you and Jake were a thing?!
Liv told me that there might be something going on between you both after she came back
I totally forgot
Sorry
It's okay, my dear.
What are you up to?
Nothing much. I have the weekend free and I can't sleep
And I thought of you
Awww <3
I hope we can see each other soon~
Same :(
I'm sorry but I have to go to work now. I'll talk to you later
Stay safe my dearest daughter
You too mom ❤️
°°°
Yun <3
Princess?
Why are you awake?
I had a nightmare :/
Why are you awake?
I'm watching a movie with Jay. You wanna join?
Hmm I'll see.
Btw did you see the news?
We're topic nr.1
Ohhhh ik ik
Come if you want
Jay is about to fall asleep so he won't bother.
I'm coming~
°°°
Quickly I turned off my phone and slowly went to the room of Jay and Jake. As I opened the door, Jake quickly showed me a psh sign so I sneaked into his bed. "What are you watching?" I whispered "I don't know? Jay chose it." I made an okay sign and cuddled into his blanket too.
I'm happy I made this decision.
please forgive me for this chapter
I rly don't know what I wrote and it's 3 in the morning 😃
Everything literally feels like a dream and I feel like I'm not even writing HAHHAHHA
Anyways a long chapter because D-D2 till 2022 AND WE HIT 80K😭😭 THANKS <33