Ink & Tears

Duality

I am terrified to be alone
I never learned to live apart
It's not so much that I need your touch
Or a loneliness made from distrust
It's the accountability I require
The responsibility I desire
Without any of that
I enter into the same old trap
I seem to fall to self destructive ways
And I know my mother she prays
I don't understand my mentality
Why is there so much instability
Two weeks on my own and I will be raging
My slow death I am staging
Never thought I would be around this long
How am I so weak but still so strong
I fly wrecklessly at a wall
And yet I still get up from the fall
Why is there such a duality
Is it just my personality
Or is there something really wrong
I'm high I'm low
I'm defeated
Ill keep going blow by blow
No matter what it is
I do still fear to be alone
Will someone please bring warmth into my home.