Beyoncé Giselle Knowles
Brown University
"What the fuck are you staring at?"
I asked mugging the girl that was next to me. I was pissed off—not only because I had to take this class but also because I had to take an art class.
I wasn't in a good mood entirely and usually when girls stared at me Id wink or something—but I was beyond pissed off.
I tried keeping eye contact with the girl who obviously had a staring problem—she was looking me right in my eyes but hers were shifting. Like she didn't know what part of my face to focus on.
She looked down after a few seconds. She wasn't talking or anything and I scoffed. "Fucking weirdo."I mumbled under my breath.
I didn't take a another look at her as I crossed my arms and slouched in my seat. I watched the teacher walk in—I actually payed attention for this one so I can see how much bullshit Robyn is putting me through.
My anger rose when he informed us we were going to be doing presentations often in this class to get better at public speaking and social skills or whatever the hell.
My social skills are fine—I'm great at public speaking. I just don't like it—and I don't like people—and I hate socializing unless I get something out of it.
Okay—maybe my social skills aren't all that.
But that doesn't mean I want to be graded on them—who the hell want to be graded on something they're terrible at?
"And following that point—not only is this a public speaking class but a social class. I want you guys to be comfortable talking to strangers because in the future that's really what presenting is going to be about. So there will be presentations where you'll have a partner or group. Wether you like the person or not." I think that was my last straw.
I was ready to leave.
This wasn't highschool. I could leave and get up without getting detention or something—I eyed the door.
He went on and blabbed about the rest of the year, I can't say I payed that much attention besides when he passed out this long ass syllabus.
I stayed in my seat and sighed. I peeked over to the girl that was eyeing me earlier to see that she was—gone. My eyes snapped to the stairs and she was walking down them quickly and left.
Just then his blabbing was over and I saw Abel walk in and look around for who could only be me. Students got ready to go and I picked up my own backpack.
"So! How was the introduction?" He asked and I shrugged. "Ass. It doesn't seem like complete hell—I just know I'm gonna hate it. And I also know it's gonna be a hassle to switch out if I try to." I said as him and I walked.
"Damn. Well maybe—" He was cut off when J heard someone call my name—well—nick name.
"Yo! B.K!" I turned around and groaned when I saw Safaree.
"Nigga what do you want?" I asked and exasperated. Safaree and I weren't really friends—him and his friends Meek and Chris pissed me off.
"Yo chill, I just wanted to see if you knew that hot girl you were sitting next to. Nerdy girls are my type. I don't know if she's a nerd but she was wearing glasses so.." He trailed off as if I gave a fuck.
"I don't know her—I don't know if she's a nerd—and honestly I would prefer if you would leave me the fuck alone." I stated looking him right in his eyes.
"So she's not off limits? Thanks!" He said as he walked away. I scoffed watching his goofy walk. I heard Abel speak up next to me.
"Who's this girl? Is she good looking?"He asked as we continued walking, making our way out the building. I shrugged. "She had a staring problem. Kept looking at me when I sat down next to her. Weird ass. I didn't really look at her." I stated and he let out a mini gasp.
"You can't be serious—come on Bey—don't tell me you got an attitude with her." He said and I rolled my eyes. "Why shouldn't I?" I asked and he was looking at me like I was crazy.
"Man, maybe Robyn was doing you a favor. " I heard him say and I quirked an eyebrow. "What do you mean?" I asked as we stopped walking and he turned around like it was obvious.
"Your social skills are ass! Who's rude to someone like that? Maybe she knew you? I mean you have slept with like half the campus."He said.
I stopped to think for a second—maybe I did sleep with her and I just don't remember? I don't have sex sober after all. Maybe she does know me.
"I didn't sleep with her. I don't think I did—I mean—I don't even remember her name—it she ever told me—because I didn't sleep with her!" I concluded proudly and I watched Abel blank face.
"No offense—but you change girls like Michelle changes her bath and body works perfume."He said.
"Full offense and you act like i'm a walking STD center like Safaree. Atleast I get tested man! And in my defense I don't remember half of those nights." I said and he shook his head.
"That's actually kinda worse. You aren't making your case any better Bey." He said and I rolled my eyes. Who was he to ridicule me?
"What lesson are you trying to teach me? Get on with it junkie." I said and he gasped in fake hurt. "I am not a junkie! I just take part in self care." He stated.
"What I was trying to get at is; My cousin took a public speaking class and said he made some of his bestfriends in there. College can be fun if you make it Beyonce." He said and I rolled my eyes.
Here he goes again with his half assed motivational speeches.
"College is expensive, what am I paying for? To wake up early for classes I don't care about? This isn't the breakfeast club or some fanfiction Im not gonna meet my new bestfriend or fall in love in a public speaking college course." I finished staring at him.
He looked at me for a second and shook his head. "You're like the scrooge." He said and I squinted at him. "The what?" I asked and he laughed a little.
"Scrooge—you're like Ebenezer Scrooge from "A Christmas Carol"." I stared at him before walkibg away.
"Love you Giraffe!" I head him yell behind me as I made my way to the campus parking lot.
"Fuck you princess Bella!" I shouted back revisiting the middle school nickname I bullied him with.
"Giselle you have got to stop arguing in public." I turned around to see Kelly with Michelle and Robyn followed.
"Can you guys hop off my ass today? I'm hungry and tired." I said. " I barely got any sleep last night, I didn't get breakfeast this morning, found out I'm taking 2 classes that I have no interest in—Thanks for that Robyn." I shaded and she nodded as if she was proud.
"..and had to listen to Abel's half assed motivation speech." I finished.
"Stop being a baby for once. We can go out and get some food." Robyn said and Michelle spoke up.
"Oh hell yeah! I'm choosing the place though because y'all suck choosing good eating places." Michelle said as we walked to our cars.
"I'm great at choosing good eating places!" Abel exclaimed and Michelle blank faced him. "This summer you took me too McDonalds and called it a birthday dinner." She said.
"Okay and? You still ate that damn Mc.Flurry." He blurted and I couldn't hold in my laugh.
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Onika Tanya Maraj
"I-I don't wanna go again." Onika said into the phone. She heard her aunt sigh. Her aunt expected to get a call like this from Onika but not this soon. She was gonna atleast give her a month but it's the first day—and not even the first offical day.
"Onika you can't give up after one bad experience." Onika still shook her head. She knew her aunt couldn't see her but it was her way of communication.
Onika sniffiled a few more times. She didn't mean to come off as creepy or annoying. That wasn't the first time someone was harshly rude to Onika.
Onika just thought she was really pretty.
"Onika—where are you right now?" Her aunt asked. "Im—I'm in the bathroom.." Onika said quietly. She was still in the college building.
"Onika please get out of the dirty bathroom and deal with this like an adult. Maybe she was just in a bad mood but she shouldn't have taken it out on you. Please don't try and drop out of a literal Ivy Leauge school because someone was mean to you." She begged.
She wasn't good with handling situations like this—and it didn't help that the teacher said that his class was the only one with assigned seats—Onika had to sit next to her.
"Sh-She probably thinks I'm weird Auntie. It's like highschool all over again and I really wanna leave." Onika said. She wiped the dry tears from her face.
"Who cares what a stranger things? Gosh Onika you need to grow a backbone. You know I love you but this is how life is. People are going to be assholes. I know you already know that..." Her aunt trailed off. She didn't want to remind Onika on how people treated her in the past but she needed her to know that just because she moved out of a small town—doesn't mean rude people disappear.
"Onika. It's Friday. You are going to go home, get ready for your interview tomorrow, have a nice actual first day of college on Monday, and you're gonna do great." Her aunt said it like it was a fact.
Onika did have an interview tomorrow, she applied for a few jobs to sustain her life and she got a call back from an Arts and Crafts store.
"If things get worse, remember the breathing techniques I taught you—the most important thing is that you calm down. Don't overthink." Her aunt said softly and Onika sniffiled.
"Talk to me Nika." She said softly over the phone and Onika let out a shaky breath. She opened her mouth but no sound came out. Her Aunt knew what that meant.
"It's okay if you can't talk right now. I love you—I really have to go but you've got this." Her aunt reassured her and Onika nodded even though she knew she couldn't see her.
Her aunt hung up and Onika did the breathing technique's she's had to do since she was 9 since her first panic attack.
Onika has anxiety.
Severe anxiety.
She got up and picked up her backpack. She looked through the fasted root to the campus parking lot so she could get home. She was calmed down enough to drive, so she briskly walked through the halls.
She was happy when she found the exit and she saw a few signs from there to get her to the parking lot.
She found her car and looked at the key on her lanyard around her neck and pushed the button.
She got in and was proud of herself for calming down that quickly. She started her car up and was careful as she backed up. She made her way to her apartment.
She was able to calm down. When she got her apartment she decided to do something that was always able to distract her.
She quickly dropped her backpack and looked in some of her unpacked boxes and found what she was looking for.
She set up her stool, easel, and paints. Onika was a painter—she thought it was a calming practice so she chose art as her Major and when she found out she could take a separate art class to fill her schedule she took the opportunity.
She painted that afternoon. She let her worries melt and painted to her hearts desire. When she was done; sure she was messy with pant on her hands and some on her shirt but she didn't mind.
When she was done and she stepped back to look—she smiled.
She was always able to center herself again when she painted.