Taehyung POV
'Fuck! If Jin finds out....' I hissed dropping into the couch. I was so fucked up, every inch of my face gave away the trouble I was in. No, not afraid of this leaking to the media, I knew that will be taken care of by the company. But if Kim Seokjin catches a whiff of this incident, my husband, my one and only love had the capacity of murdering me in cold blood.
'How bad can it be? You two are married after all!' Sejin patted my shoulder, tugging at the tablet in my hand where I played the clip on a loop, still in disbelief that it was captured. 'I am sure he will be fine, you must have mentioned it to him sometime-' he stopped talking when he saw the look in my eyes. It was one of fear, no not of my new husband's rage but fear of hurting him. My body was now drooping with immense guilt and regret, and the constant tapping of my foot gave away my anxiety.
'I wouldn't be here if he had any knowledge about this.' I chuckled, trying and failing to feel lightweight. 'Hyung, I know you are doing your best but can you hide the video from the other members, except maybe, Namjoon Hyung-'
'The thing is...' Sejin sank into the couch next to me, with a loud sigh. Something bad, I knew it.
'What is it?' I asked, eyeing their senior manager carefully.
'Jungkook-shi already saw it and stormed out of here.' He dropped the bomb, edging me to lose my shit. 'With a copy of the video.' he winced, knowing it didn't land well on the man that had jumped to his feet. Fuck, this was bad. Yes, Jungkook will screw the lights out of him, but he will also find it morally bound to enlighten his dear older brother on his new husband's dirty past.
'I am so screwed! Fuck!' I exclaimed, laughing nervously. My thoughts were spiraling now, so I decided to run and find Jungkook.
'I am sorry.' Sejin offered, scratching the back of his neck and Taehyung felt guilt pour in some more.
'It's not your fault, Hyung.' I nodded, accepting the responsibility for his actions. 'Pray that I am still married this time tomorrow.'I sighed, leaving the words in the editing room but feeling them sinking in my bones as well.
Jungkook was exploding to a very somber Jimin in the rehearsal room, while the rest of them avoided his rage. He sounded like he was upset that Jimin already knew of this and yet chose to hide from his own boyfriend. I was shoved against the wall the moment I walked into the room, pinned against it in a chokehold. In front of me were a seething face and furious eyes. Jimin, Namjoon, and Hobi pulled the face away to let me find the ground gasping for air. For a moment there, I was afraid, either I was going to heaven or Jungkook was heading to prison. And yet he hovered right there.
'I have already sent it to Jin Hyung, he should be aware of what his beloved husband does behind his back.' he spat at me, earning a glare from his other older brothers. 'I will not let you near Hyung if you do not explain yourself. There are already extra guards protecting him.' he warned, crouching at my level as I straightened up. I should be afraid of him, he looks like a mad bull. And the guards behind them were scarier. But I was more afraid of his words. So Jin knew and was waiting for him at home.
Home. The one he and Jin had created. Before we came back from Germany, his apartment was laid out for a newly wedded couple, with all my possessions laid out perfectly with Baek-shi's help. My clothes had a share of the large closet now and so did my toys. All of my books were placed alphabetically in the library and my own PC was accommodated in the game room. The biggest surprise was the photos, Jin's favorite photos that I clicked were neatly framed and lined up all along the lobby corridor. But what made the apartment our home, was Jin. And right now I was terrified of going there. I cleared my throat, meeting the eyes of every member, and started to tell my tale. And by the end of it, they all had the same look that Jimin had for me the first time he heard it. Jungkook patted me, still upset about the deeds but developing an understanding skin for my feelings. He also seemed slightly guilty for hastily sharing the video with Jin, now that he realized that his Hyung must be alone at home, emotionally traumatized. How does one face that, being the cause of it, when vows of eternity were exchanged just six months ago?
'Come on, go home now.' Hobi brought me to my feet and handed me the bag that was thrown away by Jungkook's force.
'I don't want to.' I mumbled running a hand through my hair, feeling very anxious.
'You have to explain it to him.' Jimin wound around my shoulders, repeating the line he had so many times before. But I could never muster up the courage.
'Do you want me to come along?' heads turned in surprise to the youngest bringing my scarf from another corner of the room. It was the same man that wanted to beat the shit out of me seconds ago. 'I will help you.' I considered, it could work but it could also backfire, but working sounded good, this way Jin had someone else to vouch for him and it was his favorite baby brother.
'No Jungkook-ah, you cannot help him this time. This is a very serious issue for their marriage.' Namjoon shook his head, offering his two pieces and bursting the bubble.
'Namjoon's right. It is a matter for a couple to solve amongst themselves. Hyung will actually throw you out of the house.' Hobi vouched for Namjoon's words nodding. 'Taehyung-ah, you have to face him, only you can explain it to him the right way.' a heavy hand and an ever-optimistic voice felt like a mountain of responsibility.
'But Hyung..' I sighed lost in complex thoughts.
'No, Taehyung-ah. This has to happen.' Namjoon's warning was pert, he meant every word in absolute honesty. 'For the sake of your marriage, unless-'
'No!' I exclaimed, not loving how the sentence ended. Yes, for them, for his love, I knew Jin the best. That sentence will never end in those words, ever again. I made a promise and swallowed the anxious thoughts before marching down to his car.
But they resurfaced as the car pulled up to our apartment building.
'Jin-ah, baby, I'm home.' I said with extra love. But there was no reply. I kept hoping for some divine hope that let Jin not see his phone. But looking at the state of his house now, it seemed less likely. Usually, at this hour their home would be a flurry of TV blaring and the aroma of food drawling in the air unless Jin was gaming. Hence the eerie silence now was deafening. I repeated the mantra Jimin had taught me a few minutes ago - nothing to fear, it is just Jin, your husband, whom you love, he will understand. Tension swirled in the living room, it was so dark, I could barely see the floor. But there was a shadow sitting on the chair, with stiff shoulders, clenching fists, and his eyes shining in the city lights. I switched on the lights and regretted it the very next second. Fuck Fuck Fuck, he looks super mad, I am so screwed! Unblinking dark eyes focused on me and followed me, dark shadows under the. He had cried alone. His jaw clenched and his nose flared as he gulped hard. He grits his teeth waiting for me.
'Jin, listen-'
'Do you know him?' He asked, irises swirling with something. I have seen it before, but it was never aimed at me.
'No! Absolutely Not!' I defended, speaking the truth. But he seemed unconvinced. He bang his hands on the armrests and tried to stand up 'He was just someone at the club-' I shuffled forward, instinctively to help him when he wobbled but was stopped by his hand.
'Did you sleep with him?' he asked, voice crisp as a paper tear. His eyes gave away how hurt he was, staring straight at me. Drowning me in guilt. I was ashamed to look at them anymore. I would have told Jin. Maybe a few years later. When I would have been prepared to handle how hurt he would be.
'You did!?' he exclaimed, disbelief laced his voice. Did he expect me to deny it? Shit! I should have said no. But how would that help? He would be angrier to know I am lying as well. Then again, the video only showed me kissing him while we entered the apartment and then played me escaping the next day, in the same clothes. The speck of dust on the carpet was much more appealing than Jin's blazing eyes. I desperately tried to recollect the words practiced with Namjoon Hyung but kept drawing a blank with my husband's hurt gaze on me. Staying silent wasn't helping, either, I could hear his heartbeat.
'Jin, I was really sad that time. They took me to a bar-no a club- and it was my birthday. I had a few drinks -I was really angry, depressed-' words simply tumbled out of my mouth aimlessly.
'So? You chose to cheat on me?' he spat 'You are the one who dumped me!'
'That's it, I can't do this.' he announced, a chill ran rose from my neck heading down my feet. I raised my head to see him heading toward me. 'You can go frolicking around, I will not be part of this anymore.' he said, decidedly walking past me, my heart was thudding against my ribs as I froze. He is leaving. The moment I realized it, I scrambled pleading my legs to work.
'Jin! No!' I exclaimed, grabbing at his shirt, afraid of my own actions, but wanting to stop him somehow. 'Listen to me please!' I begged, but he unhanded himself from my grip and continued stomping toward the main door. I ran to jump between him and the door, wincing at the door handle that had been shoved in my back. 'Please, listen to me.' I begged, recovering to see wide-eyed concerned for me momentarily before he pulled on the poker face. I had his attention, so I took the chance to explain. 'It meant nothing! It was just a one-night stand. My heart was broken and all I could think of was how to get back at you, how to get my revenge-'
A nerve flinched in his temple as rage filled his eyes again. 'Revenge?' Shit! My mouth! What the fuck is wrong with you Taehyung! Pure red in his eyes when his jaw tightened. He stepped closer and my back shoved again into the knob, unbothered about me wincing this time. 'So you had sex with a stranger to hurt me?' he hissed between teeth, I could see muscles twitch in his neck. But it was the flaring of his nostrils that scared me the most. I did not even feel like wincing anymore. Any words out of my mouth were only enraging him. Apology! That should work.
'I am so sorry, baby. I really didn't mean to. I cannot apologize enough.' I begged, trying to touch him, given that he was so close to me. But his eyes were bloody red instead of the usual love in them.
'Let's say you were being irrational.' he reasoned and stepped back before my hand reached his skin. I sighed, just realizing that I was holding my breath. 'Then why didn't you tell me since?' he asked, turning his back to me. My teeth were itchy to bite into his broad shoulders, delicious. But he stiffened since his question lingered in the thin air around us.
'Uh-uhm' Brain thinks now! heart shut up!
'Answer me!' I flinched when he barked at my delay.
'I couldn't. Not after what I saw.' I blurted, feeling worse with every word. They were true, but it was his weakest point. A pit in our relationship.
'Don't! Don't give me that bullshit, Kim Taehyung!' he spat, voice shaking with the burden. 'We have been married for over six months! Do you know how many days, and minutes there are in six fucking months? You could have mentioned it to me any time!' he growled, clearly reading my guilt for playing his weakling. But I have to do something for our marriage! His shoulders slumped when the room grew heavy in silence, I had just made him relive the moments. I wrapped my arms around his shoulders, to turn him.
'I should have, baby. I am so sorry, but I really didn't know how to.' I appealed, cupping his cheeks, he didn't resist. It hurt to see him give up, eyes downcast as his breathing grew heavier, I was a little scared and pained to see him like this. 'Baby, I didn't want to upset you. I knew you would react like this-' he shoved my arms away, pushing at my chest, rage returning tenfold in his eyes.
'So you planned to never tell me! If it wasn't for the leak, I would have been living in the dark! God Knows for how long!' he growled again, the last bits of his words sparked something inside me. Here I was trying to salvage our relationship, and he was just being a stubborn thickhead!
'Jin, now we are going in circles.' I let out an exasperated. 'I already told you, I didn't want to hurt you any more than you were!' I sighed, annoyance known in my tone. He didn't react, but something swirled in his eyes. 'Why are you getting mad? It happened when we broke up! Technically it is not even cheating!' I finished a little higher than my usual voice and focussed on him. He drew a sharp inhale, staring at me for a full minute, I should have been scared of the way his frown melted. But then he started to inch towards me. Finally!
'Oh, so is that it?' his tone was low, very low. He leaned in so close and I leaned in to kiss him. 'Then what about yesterday?' he asked, and I froze. My mind blanked out. I wanted to slip out of this trap, but he made me realize the tight grip on my shoulder. 'That's right, I saw you flirt with the new staff.' he chuckled, ominously. Fuck, I am so screwed! His voice was so tight, that I shut my eyes, scared to answer. I squirmed, trying to free myself.
'That was not flirting, Jin. Why would I flirt with him?'I laughed nervously, already free from his grip and putting distance between us. I ran towards our room and heard him following closely as he tried to get a grip on me. I was literally scared for my life right, he looked murderous. And maybe I should have run the other way, out of the house instead, for what happened next was frightening. Something hard hit me on the shoulder just as I turned the corner to the room. 'Ow! Wha-'
'DID YOU FORGET -THAT - YOU -ARE - MARRIED?!' his voice boomed behind me. I turned to see a vase flying toward me. In a panic, I duck and it shattered against the bedroom door with a clang. FUCK! What the hell is this? I had seen Jin angry many times, but this was new, very new for our ten years of relationship. Did I just break him? What do I do now? Fuck! Duck, Kim Taehyung! A photo frame crashed by my feet.
'Jin, what the fuck are you doing?!' I screamed as another photo frame crashed near my feet making me jump. 'Have you lost it?! You will hurt yourself!' I yelled back. 'And ME!'
'YES! Yes, I have lost it! ' a pot lid clanked the hitting wall right by my ear. Ah, that was close! 'WHERE IS YOUR RING, huh?! Where the fuck is it?! Why do you never wear it on the set!?' he shook his head screaming now, grabbing and throwing whatever found his hands. 'SEE! You are not even wearing it right now!' he paused, staring at my hand that was protecting me from his onslaught. I got a good look at him and wished hadn't, all of a sudden his eyes were bloodshot, he was heaving. His cheeks trembled absent of any color and then he threw his head back and laughed. Very dark laughter. 'OH I KNOW WHY!' his eyes danced about the room, and he snickered. 'SO THAT YOU CAN FLIRT WITH ANYONE!' he barked, stabbing me with his words. Baby, please, No! not the cats! The ceramic cat figurines we bought together from Laos, on our third anniversary, shattered into a hundred pieces on a wall next to me. My daze broke the moment he picked out a knife from the kitchen counter, correction, two knives.
'JIN! NO! THAT WILL KILL ME!' I duck behind the bedroom door, fearing for my life. At the moment, no, I didn't trust him, for this was all new to me. He gripped it harder and then dodged his troubled gaze between me and the knives, before finally setting them down on the counter. His shoulders slumped further as he gripped the wood harder, knuckles growing hard. He lowered his head, heaving in pain and frustration. 'ANSWER ME!' he yelled again.
'The stylist asks me to remove it! You know that! Army's cannot know we are married!' I screamed, equally frustrated now. He was just about to haul knives at me, and for what! Why did he sit on this for so long? We should have talked about this yesterday itself. He always does this, digging up shit from ages ago.
'Does that allow you to flirt?!' a sadistic titter broke the scowl on his face, as he turned to face me. He looked like a crazed human being, not my Jin. 'Of course, it does!' he chuckled and turned a corner to the kitchen. I stepped forward since he went out of my sight, afraid something had happened to him and then I heard the crash. My feet ran tugged by my heart, even if my mind reasoned that he could crash it on me. There was glass everywhere on the kitchen floor, and a crystal bowl shattered. I looked up to see him frantically opening more drawers and shattering them on the floor now. 'Of course, you can Flirt!' he said it, disgusted by the thought. 'Because you are the great KIM TAEHYUNG!' he screamed, still smiling. He was crunching the glass under his foot, making my heart rate double down so that one of them will pierce through. But his face gave me a do not mess with me look, smiling at the crashing glassware, his hair messy now covering the sadness in his eyes. 'I saw you, giggling and smiling at his touches. Not just me, THE WHOLE FUCKING TEAM SAW YOU!' he pointed to the door, his voice coarse now from all the screaming. My heart crumbled. I never realized how hurt he was. He mumbled to himself, grabbing a few wine glasses 'the humiliation! they all pitied me!' he dropped the glass so close to his leg, that I jumped 'I CAN FLIRT TOO! But I don't- NO! I can't!- because I actually respect my vows! No! I am stuck in this marriage!' he shook his head to himself, staring at the next victim in his hands. His hands tightened over the stem, making my skin crawl with the way his nails dug into his palm. Did he regret marrying me? But I won't let him go so easily. He is not even allowed to flirt with anyone. I will kill that man first and then die.
'Then why did you marry me?' I managed to ask, trying to get him out of his insane daze. I wanted to spite him more, for even considering our relationship to be a sham.
'YOU! You BEGGED me too!' he looked up, throwing the glasses one by one, screaming 'You' and then he stopped and laughed. 'Seokjin-ah, I will always keep you happy, be mine!' he mocked my tone waving hands in the air. I never did that. 'FUCK HAPPY! I should have known better!' his fists pulled at his own hair, wincing at how it hurt. The throbbing veins in his neck had not missed my eyes. Now he was hurting himself even more. Voluntarily.
'Do you regret marrying me?' I wanted him to focus and answer, instead of spiraling.
'Right now, YES!' he barked, letting go of his hair.
'Well, you can't do anything about it!' I teased. The ring in my pocket found its way back onto my finger, showing it off to him. 'You are stuck with me forever!' I said and stuck my tongue out to him. But he was not in that headspace yet, just as I turned to head into the living room, the water bottle hit me square on the back of my head.'OW! that hurt!' I mewled, rubbing my head, and turned to see him if he was still pissed at me. And no, there was battle playing in his dark eyes. Nah! Definitely his heart! It will never encourage hurting its owner!
A/N: a thousand apologies for the delay in releasing the next chapter. I had a tragedy at home wherein I lost someone and was not in a state to write anything. Besides the support of my family, this platform is now helping me come back to my normal self. Thank you for your support, dear reader.