"Akira... Kamitsuka...?"
My eyes widened as Yato grabbed my hand. A bright light appeared once again. And the next thing I knew was that we were not in front of the school building anymore. Instead, we were back, in front of the entrance of the shrine.
I pulled back my wrist and stared at Yato. "Why... Did you do that...?" He didn't answer. And somehow I got angry. "Why?!" My voice became louder. I didn't only feel anger but... Also something else. Maybe uncertainty...? I don't know...
"I... I can't tell you that..."
So that's how it was... I tried to calm down. Yet my thoughts were racing. "I see...", I blurted out, surprised by how much I actually managed to calm down at least my voice.
As Yato let go of my wrist and turned around, I parted my lips once again to say something, but quickly closed them. I couldn't say that now...
He was trying to hide something from me... Wasn't he...?
A few hours passed. We just continued, having requests my others. The time we spent alone wasn't that awkward as I expected it to be, after I yelled at him. It seemed that he was more kindhearted and forgiving than I thought, after all...
I sat beside him while we were eating some rice balls, an old lady gave us. Yato took out his phone for a while and stared at the display. It was past 3pm.
"So when will we meet them?" He stared at me. "Those people who wanted to meet you, I mean." "Ah..." He paused. "Do you really want to meet them?" I didn't know how to answer. "Why are you asking me...?" He stared at the ground. I gulped. "I just think it might be better if you wouldn't meet them." He took another bite. "What...?"
"You might be better off without meeting this people, for now..."
For a while it was quiet. "So after all... It is true..." I stood up, my back facing Yato. "You are hiding something from me..." "Aki--" I ran. I didn't even know why. The fact that he just won't tell me why he acted so weird made me feel angry. And yet I didn't even know why.
I don't know anything in fact. Not even about myself. I am here. Here without any reason. And yet, I keep on living. Why is that so? Oh right... I still don't know after all. There is only one thing I knew. And I wasn't even sure of that. But at least I wanted to believe that this was true.
I am Akira.
No more, no less.
I didn't even know where I ran. The people around me didn't even seem to care. As if I was invisible in their eyes. Well, maybe I was... How would I know?
I ran until I bumped into someone. The anger inside of me stirred up, as I bit my lip and stood up. "Can't you watch where you are go--" I paused. Without a reason. And then I bowed. "No... I... I am sorry for bumping into you..."
And as I looked up I felt something weird. As if I already experienced this before. Why did I actually apologize? This person would forget me and go away again anyways... Wasn't that so? But... This feeling was overwhelming... How do you call this again? Ah right... Déjà Vu...
Even though I expected the girl to walk away without saying anything, she just stared at me. I couldn't see her face. The sun which placed in the sky, right behind her head didn't allow me to. It was too bright. Only as a cloud let the bright sun disappear for a few seconds, I was able to look into her face.
Pink eyes. Brown, long hair. Quite pale skin.
Her voice... "Akira-chan...?" It hurts...
And as I heard another voice, I couldn't help but look to where it came from. "Hiyori... Let's just go home. That idio--"
A boy. Orange eyes and blonde hair.
I heard their voices echoing inside of my head.
"You're the same as me?"
"I am the assistant of that idiot."
"It's just... The last time we saw each other you..."
"Would you mind also helping me with learning stuff, later...?"
"Don't say things like that!"
"I am not really good with comforting people... But even though... We are here for you, Akira."
"Because... We are friends... Right?"
Tears escaped my eyes as I sank on my knees. "Friends..."
How much I wished, I could also say that...
And then there was someone else who ran after me. I looked back just to see the young man who said he was a god. Who said that I shall be his Yokai. Who gave me a new life. Who told me he might grant my wish.
Who left me, when I needed him the most...
I hurridly wiped away my tears and stood up once again. I put on a smile as I looked at the blonde and the brunette. "Sorry for disturbing."
I knew this people too well. Hiyori and Yukine... Not only these two, but also Yato. Of course I knew them. How could I forget them? But yet... Why was I pretending to still not know anything? Why was I pretending to never have seen this people before? Was I running away? Was I scared? But from what?
From getting hurt, again? From being broken again?
For a while, time seemed to stop. I looked to Yato eho was now standing beside me, also staring an Hiyori and Yukine.
Ah... That's right...
It looked as if Yato trued to say something. He moved his lips. But at the same time, I didn't hear a thing. It was as if I was isolated in my own little world.
That just would be impossible...
I just watched as Hiyori looked down on me again and suddendly hugged me. I heard a quiet "I am so sorry..." escaping her lips. I didn't know how to react at all. Maybe hug her back? Just stand there? Cry? Or maybe say something?
After all...
Even though I remembered everything, it was as if I still didn't know anything at all. And then again the only thing I knew was still inside my mind. I am Akira. And also another thing which I found in the deepest corner of my head...
I already am broken.