"Ew!" Evi exclaims as a bird poops on her French toast. "Come on!" She groans.
"Oh! Crap!" Evi hears from a little ways away. "Sheesh!"
Evi pouts and throws her French toast in the trash. "Now what am I gonna eat?" She asks Fletcher.
"We'll get you something else. Come on." He says taking her hand.
Fletcher and Evi walk away from where they were standing. Almost instantly a loud thump can be heard. They turn around and a man is on the ground.
•.•
Bailey and some other doctors along with George and a Evi are with the guy named Stu who fell, lying on a hospital bed.
"Window washer. Fell from fifth floor scaffolding. Obvious open tib/fib fracture but otherwise okay." Bailey says.
"Equal breast sounds. After a 5 storey fall he's got equal breast sounds!" George gushes. Cristina walks into the room up to Bailey. "This is unbelievable! Do you wanna hear?" George continues.
"Some how I believe you. Yang, get in there and palpate his abdomen." Bailey says.
"Does this hurt anywhere?" Cristina asks.
"No." The patient says.
"You fell from the sky. 5 stories. And you only injured your leg." George says.
"George." Evi scolds.
"No. Don't George me. A few seconds there ago he would've landed on me." George says.
"Ok rolling on three please. 1, 2, 3." Cristina says rolling her eyes. A bunch of doctors lift Stu onto his side. There are splattered feathers on his back as well as dried blood.
"Oh." Bailey says.
"Are these feathers?" Cristina says.
"My life was saved by that pigeon." George says.
"Let's get some x-rays. And after that you might want to get in there and look for the rest of Tweety." Bailey says.
George picks up a feather, looks at and whispers. "Thank you."
•.•
Stu was lying on his stomach. Evi and George were removing bits of the splattered pigeon from Stu's back.
"Beak?" He asks
"Claw." They both say.
"We need to widen this incision to take a better look." Evi says.
"Alright." George says. He bends down close to Stu and speaks softly. "Does your leg hurt a lot?"
"I'm fine man. Just ... do your thing."
George goes back briefly to removing feathers but then leans back down.
"Is there anyone you'd like me to call?"
"What for?"
"You fell 5 stories and lived to tell about it. I'd kinda wanna shout it from the roof tops." Evi gives him a look. "So to speak. It's a miracle! You may not understand the medicine of it but a 5 story fall, your lungs should be collapsed, your back should be broken, your aorta should be totally severed-"
"George, enough!" Evi whisper-yells at George.
"I'm just saying there's a reason for this. You lived! We both did. Carpe diem man! Seize the day."
"Any chance you could make him leave?" Stu asks Evi.
"I really, really wish I could."
Bailey enters with some x-rays of Stu's legs. "Mr. Vargas, your lower left leg bones are shattered. We need to get you into surgery." She says.
"Oh great just my luck."
Evi holds up the beak. "Beak." She says.
"Could I? Would you mind? Could I keep that?" George asks Stu. Stu gives him a look.
•.•
George, Evi and Meredith are at a nurse's desk. Cristina comes to the desk as well.
"Shouldn't he be more excited? Maybe he's in shock, I dunno. But I mean he survived! It's huge! He's gotta realize that things happen for a reason." George says.
"George you have really got to get over this bird thing." Evi says.
"Oh yeah my ex-boyfriend moved his wife to Seattle. Reason: To torture me." Meredith says.
"I'm serious." George says.
"So am I." Meredith says.
"So am I." Evi says to George.
"What's with the 'Hello Kitty' on your forehead?" Cristina asks Meredith.
"I don't want to talk about it."
"George can I sign out to you early?"
"You don't want in on Stu's surgery?"
"Can't. I have a test date." She lowers her voice. "Burke is testing me." She returns to a normal level. "Plus I've already spent an hour picking bird parts out of the guy. I'm over it."
"Carpe diem."
"Giant zit on my forehead and I'm beginning to look how I feel. Carpe that."
"This is the luckiest day in the world!"
"Tell that to the bird George. Do you think the bird is having a good day right now?!" Evi says shaking his shoulders.
•.•
"Wow you look hot." Evi says entering the locker room with Meredith.
"Yeah. Burke and I are gonna talk about how hot I am over dinner. This date is such a mistake." Cristina says as she starts taking off the red dress.
"But it's easy to get nervous on dates. It's especially hard if you're out of practice so you just got be mellow..." George says.
"Yeah I know how to date George. I'm not you."
Alex has enters the room. George goes into the men's bathroom.
"I have a scheduled for the mastectomy. And I get to stay while plastics does a TRAM flap reconstruction." Alex brags.
"I couldn't do it." Izzie says.
"Do what? Make yourself all hot and sexy for your boyfriend like Yang?" Alex asks.
Cristina is now putting a purple dress. "Go wrestle something." She says.
"I couldn't cut off my ovaries and breasts just because I might have cancer." Izzie says.
Cristina yanks up the dress fully and walks up to Meredith to zip her up.
"Think of it like a hand. If someone told you you'd die if you didn't chop off your hand you'd do it." Cristina says.
"Except when you chop off a hand you don't kill your s*x drive, have silicone breasts, get hot flushes and lose your ability to bear children." Cristina pulls of her scrub pants.
"If it were me I wouldn't even have the test. I mean what's the point? We're all gonna die anyway right?" Meredith said.
They all stare at her. "It's the 'Hello Kitty' band-aid on my forehead. It's freaking me out." She justifies.
"I say slice 'em and dice 'em. Whatever. They're body parts." Alex says as Cristina moves back to the mirror and starts putting on some black heels.
"So you'd cut of your penis?"
"If it kept me from dying. Besides, I've got
plenty of spare." He says making Evi gag. Izzie makes a face and Alex leaves.
"I can do hot in my sleep. I look hot in scrubs. I'm a hot person. He's seen my naked a thousand times." Cristina says. George walks out of the bathroom at this very sentence and closes his eyes painfully.
"Bad, bad images in my head." George mumbles.
"But he's never seen you outside the hospital." Evi points out.
"Thank you." Cristina says sarcastically.
•.•
Evi was in the OR where Stu is lying down. George was in there as well.
"Dr. Bailey's scrubbing in so we're gonna get started." The anesthesiologist says.
"Okay. Hey George. Listen, did you find her?" Stu asked.
"I'm very sorry Stu. They said she's on vacation."
"Oh, yeah? Maybe her parents. I bet you she went up to New Hampshire. That's where she's from."
"I'm gonna push the joy juice."
"Oh up, up and away." Stu says making the anesthesiologist chuckle.
"Maybe you can see her after your surgery. You know when you recover. Maybe then." Evi says.
"It's all good man. Thanks for trying." He starts trailing off. "It really meant a ... lot ... to ... me." Stu's heart monitor starts beeping rapidly.
"Hold on guys. We have a problem." The anesthesiologist says.
"He's crashing?" George says confused.
"Dr. Bailey?" Evi asks.
"O'Malley start CPR." She says. She turns to another doctor. "Push Epi."
•.•
Evi, George and Bailey are walking out of the OR. "You'll need to notify the family." Bailey says.
"What happened?" Evi asks.
"There'll be an autopsy. Sometimes people get on the table and they just die. There's no way of knowing beforehand and no way of controlling it."
"But he fell 5 stories and lived. It doesn't make any sense. He survived so I could go and find Daisy. And then she didn't even want to see him so what's the point?" George asks.
"We're all part of the cosmic joke O'Malley. Now leave me alone."
She wanders to the OR board.
•.•
Evi was sitting on a low concrete wall. George was pacing up and down along the wall.
"I thought he cheated fate." George says.
"Maybe he did cheat fate." Evi says.
"He died."
"I think you can't wait for someone to fly underneath you and save your life. I think you have to save yourself."
"You mean the pigeons aren't going to come?" Evi shakes her head.
"The pigeons aren't going to come."
•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•