⚠️Hello everyone. This is an awareness chapter. More people think this on a daily basis then you know. Be kind to those who have been adopted. Most of their minds are full of unanswered questions and painful blame.
⚠️To those of my loves that may be adopted, welcome to the family. So am I. I love you and I'm here for you, your never alone
Background: your a new avenger and your writing a letter to your birth mom trying to get the pain to go away. You don't know why your thinking it will work, you've written hundreds of letters to her. You just want to be loved, to be understood, to be cared for. You've been alone all your life, that is until Natasha came along.
Your POV:
I sat down at my desk. I'm the avengers new recruit, and I've got a pretty messed up past. My birth mom gave me up at two and I was never adopted, I just stayed in the system, passed from family to family like I was some cash kid. My caseworker swore that I'd get adopted but I remember turning 18 vividly. I left with my backpack around my shoulder and my caseworker didn't even bare me farewell. I just wish I knew why. The worst part is that there were seven of us in total. I've got six other siblings. And before you ask I wasn't their first child, she didn't have me young, she kept four of us and got rid of the other three. I was one of those three. I picked up the pen and started writing.
-small time skip-
It had been two hours, my hand was starting to cramp. I got up and decided I'd get something to eat, I headed to the kitchen.
Natasha's POV:
Y/N left her clothes in the laundry. I put them in my basket and headed to her room. I knocked on the door "Y/N?" No answer "I have clothes I'm coming in" I entered the room and she wasn't there. The only thing was her notebook open. Y/N was a very neat person. I put her clothes down and went to close the book when the title caught my eye. I know it wasn't my business but Fury ordered me to watch her. This was a way to see if she was doing something she shouldn't be. I began to read
August 17
Birth mom,
I'm doing so well without you, I have a job and a place to stay. I just turned 24. In case you were wondering, no, I never got adopted. You put me in that damn system and I never had a family then. I grew up was sent out and was handed a slip with homeless shelters. You know the worst part? The streets were better then the foster homes. At least I wasn't being told that I was useless and unwanted. I wasn't being told that I'd never amount to anything. I'm where I am right now because I had to learn how to fight, how to protect myself, because no one would do it themselves. I was 13 when I learned how to handle a gun, I stole it from a foster family, and I'm pretty damn good at it. I learned how to do everything on my own! You left me! You fucking abandoned me!. I have so many trust issues, mommy issues, love issues, and mental issues because of you. By the way I'm gay, not that you would care but it's whatever. I like someone at my work to, she's amazing.By the way if I ever do have kids I'm adopting and I will already be a better mother then you will ever be because I will love them unlike you loved me.
I need to ask you a few things. To get it off my chest. It's still eating me. For one why me? Why wasn't I the one you wanted? You know kids are not something you buy at a store then return when you don't want it right? I'm sorry I didn't come with a receipt. Two, do you ever think of me? Do you get flashbacks from them taking me into the car and watching them drive away? Do you ever remember my screams? Me begging you to take me back and promising you I'd be good. Because I do. I don't call them nightmares anymore, it's become so regular and I've become so numb that there just dreams now, it doesn't mean that I don't wake up in a panic but I mean there not nearly as bad as when I remember foster home 4, 7, 9, and 12. Honestly I wish I didn't give a fuck anymore but I do, I wish you could see the person I have become, I can't wait to see the sorry look on your face.
I hope I don't look like you. I hope I look nothing like you. My eyes are y/e/c my hair is y/h/c. I'm y/h feet tall. I don't remember much but I remember your hands, they were always cold. For those two years you never once told me you loved me. I remember the feeling of being hungry, I remember the smell of cigarettes and the liquor. I don't wanna remember it anymore. I guess what I want to say is that I hate you and I wish I could stop thinking about you.
Goodbye.
I stepped back and stood there, taking in everything I just read. I knew I had to tell Fury but deep down I knew I should talk to Y/N. I left her clothes and went to find her.
She was sitting in the kitchen and I walked up to her "hey Y/N you ok?" She shook her head "y-yeah why?" I gently rested my hand on her shoulder "I need to talk to you about something" her eyes went wide "am I in trouble? I'm sorry I'm so sorry" I squeezed her hand "no no nothing like that, I just saw something. Come with me"
She followed me into my room and I sat on the bed and she sat with me, I looked at her "I was bringing your clothes into your room, and I saw your journal. Fury ordered me to look after you. I'm sorry I was just following orders" she looked down "y-you won't tell anyone will you?" I put my arm around her "I have to tell Fury but that's it" she looked down "you didn't read anything else....did you?" I shook my head no, she looked at me again "and you aren't gonna yell at me because I'm gay?"
My heart sunk and I caressed her cheek "well if I did that would make me a hypocrite wouldn't it?" Her eyes went wide "wait? Your?" I shook my head and she started to cry, I opened my arms and she fell into them, I rubbed her back "your safe here. We're your family. Don't cry hun" she clung to me, like I had just become her lifeline. I rubbed her back "hun can I ask you something?" She shook her head "who do you like?" She looked down "it's stupid, I'd never get them anyway" I lifted her chin "it's not stupid Y/N. Tell me. I'll help" she shook her head "you can't help me" I smiled "sure I can" she looked up "you can't because it's you" I smiled and kissed her gently, she blushed and I made her look at me "feelings mutual darling. I will take care of you. You will be mine and I will never. Ever. Leave you like she did" she smiled and held onto me "thank you Natasha" I cuddled her closer "I'm here now"
I really don't know what to say about this. I hope it at least helped someone. I know how important Natasha is to some of you and to have a comfort character like her is amazing. There are billions of different scenarios out there that people are facing. I just hope this brought comfort to someone.
Requests are always welcome!
As always: I love you all 3000 and thank you