Welcome to your life
There's no turning back
Even while we sleep
We will find you
Acting on your best behaviour
Turn your back on mother nature
Everybody wants to rule the world- lorde
"Are you sure you want to do this?"
"No"
"Then let's leave this for another day Charlie...don't push yourself" I sighed looking at the dark brown door as I talked to myself. I felt like I was going crazy but well- not that my biggest problem right now
I bite my lip "I can't wait anymore, they can't wait anymore" I told myself not even letting my brain fizzle out by overthinking or even try to make me anxious about heading inside. I unlocked the door already heading inside the apartment, it's been almost 3 months that I haven't stepped inside here or even come near the apartment complex.
I was to afraid too.
It hasn't changed one bit, all the boring decore where in the same place letting the room seem lifeless without a soul living here as if there weren't a family here; which was true. Jason has been living with someone he doesn't want to tell me, Percy is back home and well I had left, my fingers touched the wooden tables filled with pictures of famous people grandmother has met.
Stopping when I saw our old family picture making me faintly smile, it was taken when I was 10 or older yet I was curious since I don't even remember taking this when though I seemed happy showing all my missing teeth to the camera. We seemed perfect on the outside.
A loud huff made me snap my head towards the sound seeing two dark shadows slowly coming towards the light, their yellow large eyes staring at me with focused eyes not reconizing me. I laughed taking my hood off as their ears perked up finally realising the stranger in the house was.
"My babies, come here bubba" I kneeled down ignoring the dangers of letting two large dogs tackle me to the floor, Koda was the first to butt his head on my head as he whined and cried while Angie just grumbled in the background wary of me, confused on my sudden departure then appearance in the house.
"Come here beautiful" I looked over to her extending my hand out as she slowly tapped her paws towards him, her eyes looking at me in a cautious way as she sniffed the air around me trying to confirm it's me "Lemme kiss that big head of yours dummy"I didn't let her take her time as he planted a kiss to her nose making her ears jump up in surprise, as I was shocked she didn't bite me in fear of my sudden movement but instead literally headbutt me full force before opening a large grin towards me.
Like I said before, they look scary but could never hurt a fly.
I let them get their excited butts calmed before I decided to explore the house to see if someone was home but not even the maids where here, Koda didn't leave my side as I followed my way to my room just ignoring the sinking feeling even though there was nothing wrong with anything in the house. Maybe it was what I came here for, the why I forced myself to come to this house.
I twisted the nob of the door "Hey-"
I was going to protest on Koda opening the door with his body as he entered the room with a growl but as the door slowly opened itself the sinking feeling came harder.
It was all to pieces.
My room, destroyed to the very bits everything I had decorated on the walls to even the mess on the floor- all of it teared or broken. Picture frames were shattered on the floor along with wripped pages of notes I took when I was younger, my jaw slacked open as I looked at my bed seeing the bedsheets and matress cut open as it's filling where all over the place. I just stood in the room trying to figure out who could have done this knowing my grandmother would have preserved my room hoping I would be back to stay in it.
I didn't even flinch when Angie growled seeingt the messy room while sniffing the whole room like Koda was doing the fur on the back of their neck standing up sensing something bad.
"Nobody is here bubba" I told him, the tone of my voice calm and unbothered, not that I didn't care for the destruction of my room- I was just to tired to care at the moment.
The room was a complete mess and hearing the dogs paws step on hangers and clothes in the closet I assumed it had been raided too even though it was mostly empty, it was entirely searched so meaning they never found what they needed. Which kinda make my stomach sink knowing if they didn't find it here...they would try to find it again.
"If you want something to be hidden, you leave it somewhere where everyone can see it" I laughed not believing the words that left my lips, I didn't hesitate to walk over the large lenght mirror in the corner of my room; my eyes staring at my own reflection not really seeing me.
I felt like I was staring at someone else and I didn't if that was a good thing.
"Some times, it's right infront of you" It was so simple.
My fingers pulled the edges of the glass lifting it up just enough to see the opening on the bottom showing that the lenght was uneven but not noticeable for anyone to be suspecious of, the cold metal touched my warm digits as I grasp the item I was looking for pulling it up to my eye level.
Dangling from my fingers was a cold chain, it looked old and unpolished not a glint of shimmer from it's original gold paint and right at the bottom of the chain was a heart shaped locket. Small engravings were molded on the gold locket giving it a little more personality then it's beaten up color and some dented areas.
I glared at it.
This was exactly what they were looking for, I knew that much, I didn't care for who they were but one thing I knew was that they looked in all the places that a small thing would be hidden; where you wouldn't exactly look for. I let it drop to the floor before grabbing a small packet from the wall of the wooden frame as I let the mirror slide down to it's original place.
"Why are you so important..." I grumbled at the objects on the floor, this was had to be what was so importent to find. My money, expensive clothes and jewlery but none of them were taken, yet they continued to look.
To be honest nothing much was of value in anything I hidden, just sentimental- well, I did hide because she told me too.
My fingers opened the locket just seeing a small paper crammed in it written in small writting in black pen 33 8749 151 2009. I had no idea what those numbers meant but she was very certain that I kept it hidden.
The small enveloped contained the pictures I found when I searched her house- safe house. The money and gun I left with Jack not wanting that anywhere near me even though I had no idea why she had them yet -I couldn't give him the list of names. I didn't know why, I had the oportunity to tell him to show him but I couldn't.
I had promised but at what coast, what good does it do anymore...
There was growl coming from my closet as I turned to see Angie pawing at the open door whinning over to Koda, I pushed myself off the ground heading towards the closet petting her large head to calm her down while I peered in seeing the black dog growl at the corner of the room. Every hanger was on the floor even the clothes I had left behind.
"What are you growling at?" I grabbed him by his colar trying to pull him back but his growls got louder making me forwn on what was spooking him. "Wha-"
I stopped letting of his colar in shock, my blood ran cold as I took a step back.
A bloody hand print was plastered on my white wall with writting beside it 'you can't keep a promise forever' as it still dripped on the floor, it wasn't days old, it was just printed. That sick feeling came in my stomach again but this time...it wasn't an anxious feeling it was...
run
I didn't even hesitate to listen to the voice in my head as I turned around bolting out of the closet grabbing my things on the floor before running down the hall hearing the dogs paws chase after me in the same panic state I was seeing them pass me with their tails between their legs. The feeling kept growing and growing as I tried to get out of this hallway feeling like I was being chased myself and I didn't dare look back.
I could hear the footsteps not knowing if it was the echo of mine or...the person was still inside the house.
My hands grabbed the front door handle pulling it open hearing the footsteps come closer and louder towards me, I slammed my shoulder on the framing of the door trying to get out after the dogs before shutting the door so hard I felt it crack with the pressure. I held the handle feeling my breathing go uneven before holding my breath completely, the only thing I could hear was a hand being placed on the door and heavy panting and I was sure neither were from my dogs who were barking loudly from beside me.
I could still hear the heavy breathing from the other side.
"Miss- Miss! Miss Charl- are you okay?" I was stopped by the doorman as I wobbled my way out the elevator, his eyes looking into mine trying to find what was wrong.
"Who did you let upstairs" I asked. His face contorted in confusion with a small awkward laugh.
"Only you- I was informed this aftertnoon you had returned in the morning, you were the only person in the house" No I wasn't and I was sure I wasn't alone in the room "Is everything alright?"
"Tell my grandmother to book a hotel for the next few weeks, someone broke in" I didn't wait for him to ask as I simply walked away clenching the items in my hand feeling the necklace burn in my hand.
-
"Charlie?" I looked up from the vinyl that was in my hands to see Mitch, I laughed seeing how diferent he looked rn. His beared was shorter along with his hair making him look younger than he actually is; not to mention making him seem aproachable.
I liked it to be honest, he looked very good with the new hair cut.
"I like your hair, it suits you" I smiled gently before letting my body do what it wanted, I felt my ass hit the floor as I laughed pushing my hair out of my face feeling the cold nose poke my arm before a lick "I'm sorry, I know the sign says no dogs but- welll"
He squatted in front of me "Are you high?" I shook my head as I bite my lip feeling scared again.
"Where's Jack?" I asked ignoring the hurtful question even though I may look disheveled but I was clearly cousious to see I was sober yet I didn't blame him for it.
I looked out of my mind.
"Out. Why do you need him, think I haven't noticed you two whispering behind close doors" I rolled my eyes knowing he was thinking something so stupid then what it actually was. I shook my head leaning my head back hitting it the wooden stand a bit to hard causing me to wince. "God why am I even trying here- I'm callin Harry"
"I wanted Jack...so he could teach me to shoot a gun"
Mitch paused his hand on his phone, just staring at the screen as if I had told him I blew up a subway station and he was trying to process it- to be honest this must not be the weirdest thing he has heard someone say. His brows pulled together as he tilted to the side opening and closing his mouth.
"Someone broke into my house today- I was still inside it while they were there. It's not like I don't know how to fight, first thing I learned was self defense after getting my ass handed to me by my own father" I laughed remembering the first time I had kicked back at the man, I was so proud of myself and I didn't care if my nose was bent seconds later. "I'm not dealing with a dumb fuck anymore, people tried to run me over, tried to fuckin kidnap me, punching hit man won't do shit"
"So you think a gun is gonna make everything better?" Mitch sat down in front of me raising an eyebrow at Angie who sniffed his shoe as he moved it as both tensed seeing each other move, it was funny to see two very 'dangerous' things be afraid of each other.
Ironic isn't it.
"Better safe then a bullet in my head" I smiled with a fake look "I'm protecting myself, for the first time I actually want to stay alive"
He looked at me for a few seconds "Who broke into your house, got a chance to look at them?"
"No, I think they knew I was going there somehow- they only touched my room nothing else. Not even the dogs knew they were there until I approached my room" I smoothed out Koda's shinny black fur since he was laying down on the floor with his head in my lap , the large dog looking at me with those soft eyes of his.
"I don't think they even wanted to touch me, I mean they did leave a very dramatic message for me but they had a chance to hurt me or even kill me" A shiver ran down my spine still being able to hear their panting from the other side, I knew they had a chance to grab me to do whatever they wanted but why; why did they let me go.
I gripped the locket and papers in my hand and the small pen drive of all the names that were on the hit list, the original CD had vanished a few days after it got home and I really didn't know where it was which made me feel even more worse about not saying anything. I looked at Mitch seeing him rub his hand over his jaw seeming in deep thought making me sigh grabbing the pen drive and throwing it at him, which didn't go as planned.
Instead of falling on his lap, it hit his forehead before falling on the floor with a 'click'
"Seriously?" He muttered as I smiled watching him grab it "What is it?"
"The deadpool"
Silence.
That's all the room had was silence between the both of us as his eyes focused on the screen of the laptop while he scrowlled through the names, each one with discription about the person. I could tell he knew some seeing how his body language chance as he skimmed to pass to the next name.
I didn't watch his expression when he got to my families name, I didn't need to see the judment as he read the truth about my family but I wouldn't be surprised if all of them knew about this- couldn't help but to find funny that Harry might know more about my own family than me, maybe I should read my own file.
I mean how would I even know this, I never actually cared to figure out what my parents did for a living and this wasn't what I pictured- well. I'm not surprised they were this awful, this disguting but my grandparents.
Evelyn Martin may be the devil but she was no where near cruel to do anything as bad as what was writting down in those pages. I wondered if she knew about this or maybe it was the poor excuse of parents that had this all wrapped around their fingers, dirty money that made our name big- what gave us the life we have today.
At least I'm not apart of it anymore.
Well jokes on my grandmother for cutting me off like I needed that money- that red tinted money to survive, like I was a spoiled brat that bitched about money 24/7. She really doesn't know me.
I haven't told Harry I'm tecnically broke at the moment seeing there was no need, I still had my pocket money along with the 20k I found in her aparment in case I ever needed it but it's not like I'll be traveling any time soon to waste so much money. Plus Harry was already over the top with everything that had me in it, I really didn't want to bother him with one more thing that wasn't even important.
Well...- now I'm fucked cause I have no idea how I'm going to explain the bloody handprint and the deadpool list on a pendrive with all of my things in it. I should win the dumb bitch award for how stupid I can be sometimes.
"I'm sorry" I frowned looking at Mitch who had a guilty look on his face and quiet frankly I had no idea why he would even feel that towards me "I miss judged you. I thought you were a spoiled brat that was dating my friend for the heck of it- you seemed like the type to do it for attention so people can like you or whatever. No offense"
I gave him a blank stare "I'm still wondering where is the apology in that speech"
"I knew what was on paper and I really didn't get the chance to get to know you. We don't get the good life, or the luxury of being normal. I didn't want neither of my brothers to get hurt after you got bored of this, I didn't realize that you-"
"That I love Harry" I cut him off looking him not even looking away even though I felt heat rush to my neck and cheeks, saying something like that out loud made it feel more real.
Much more real than it should be.
"I'm sorry- about my assumptions and about your father. I didn't know" Mitch looked down ashamed that he thought the worst of me but that only made me smile, I didn't care if he thought I was the monster under the bed that might eat them alive, I cared that he knew me.
That he cared enough to say he was sorry even though I didn't know about anything he thought of me.
"I don't really mind. I thought you were an asshole who had a stick up his ass when I met you" He laughed, for the first time since I've met Mitch for all these months this is the first time I've actually heard him laugh and smile at me like this- and not in a sarcastic way. "So..."
"I'm not teach you how to shoot a gun"
"Oh come one, we had a moment here. Shouldn't that count" I grunted feeling offended we didn't immediately become best buddies.
"You're American, that's a danger on it self" Mitch stood up with a smirk on his lips as he left on the floor with my mouth wide open from his hurtful, hurtful soo true yet very hurtful words.
I stood up following his lead "And what makes you? British?"
"I'm fuckin Canadian"
Really?
"I though you people were nice huh, I really prefered when you hated me at least you'd let me have a gun" I muttered annoyed before he stopped making me stop as well.
"I regret what I said now, you are so annoying" He sighed as I rolled my eyes. Dramatic Canadian dickhead. "I'll teach you- if, if you tell Harry about this and about the person in your house"
I opened and closed my mouth not expecting him to actually agree to it, I had a lot of witty comments to throw at him but they were all gone from my head as he mentioned I should tell Harry about what happened today- where do I even start?
God that man is going to put a bullet in the wall one day because of me- or someone's head.
"Yeah kinda want to know who the fuck broke in my girlfriend's apartment" I jumped from the harsh voice coming from the top of the stairs, Harry, and he really didn't look pleased. When they said this basement was sound proof they weren't kidding "I thought you had that place kept an eye on"
"I did- before she moved in with you. It had no purpose anymore, why waste men on that when they were needed in other places" Hold up- take a step back.
I rose my hand "You had people watch my house?" I rose my eyebrows, I understood Jack and Mitch but strange men watching; that's crossing the line "Are you insane?"
"yeah I'm not participating in this"
Harry was now in front of me as him and Mitch swaped positions now letting me and my boyfriend alone in the smelly room while I wasn't very happy to see him. And neither did he at the momemt.
"You let strangers watch over me. Do you know how fuckin creepy that is for me, don't you dare say you trust them because I don't, they aren't you or Jack who I trust with my life- you are the poeple I trust not them. What if they were the people that were after me huh? What if they got in their heads I seemed like a good person to-"
"I'd kill them before they had that thought. I told you before Charlie that I had people looking after you but I had stopped after I got pissed at the thought of that happening. But I didn't stop them from keeping an eye on the place you should feel safe in" Harry's voice was firm as he stared down at me not liking the idea that I put in his head but it makes two of us and I could feel my skin crawling at the disgusting scenarios I created in my head. "I told you I'd protect you and the people you care about"
"AND HOW DID THAT TURN OUT?" I screamed not being able to keep my emotions bottled up, my fear being more on show right now "Someone was in that house, God knows who's blood that was plastered on my fuckin wall and don't get me started that they were watching me the whole time before they chased me in my own house"
"Who was there when the only thing between me and who ever was there was a door. I had no one"
"You think I don't know- Why the fuck did you think I called you for the last 2 hours non stop thinking something bad had happened to you? I saw what they left on your wall and what they did to your room" I pinched my eyebrows togther as I grabbed my phone seeing 45 missed calls from Harry and Jack- only one from Mitch. I rubbed my eyes frustrated in myself for being so fuckin stupid.
"Pause"
"What?" He frowned when I held my pointer finger up.
"I haven't seen you all day and I'm not going to fight you over something so stupid" I whispered closing my eyes just wishing I hadn't even gone to that house or had the thought of it "I missed you"
In his stubborn and mad face a small smile cracked on it as he nodded grabbing my hand and tugging me to his body, his smell was already intoxicating my nose making me relax in his grasp letting my head fall on his hard chest. He smelled like gun powerder this time, not the oaky and lavender smell- I didn't even question it.
I never do anyways...not like I wanted to know why
"I'll tell you next time if it makes you comfortable or not, I just want you safe baby- I sometimes I forget to act when it comes to you"
I've noticed.
"I liked that you're taking care of my family...I'm sorry I yelled, I'm scared Harry" I looked up to him, his face was like an open book and he really didn't try to hide it. He was scared as much as I was seeing his green eyes turn diferent shades from the sea of emotions rushing through him.
At this moment I couldn't help but to feel a sinking feeling in my stomach as today replayed in my head, there was no way out out of this anymore, I don't even think there was a way before this all blew up. I could feel the breathing from the other side of the door, the way it made my skin crawll- I knew I couldn't keep this forever.
What if-
Unpause.
Update tomorrow. Hold on to your hats.