My heartbeat roared in my ears. Shinobi is dead. Shinobi is dead. My fault… my fault Shinobi is dead. I couldn’t get my gaze to leave those sightless green eyes. Dead. Dead. Dead. Was the world going to end? I had never truly experienced the death of someone. Torture was a no brainer, but death? An escape, I told myself. Death is an escape.
Aisu let out a tortured moan of pain as he lay on me, his voice heavy and rough, his body twitching ever so slightly. It tore me out of my daze and right into Protective Pack Overlord Mode. “Aisu?” I whispered, coursing my fingers through his hair. “What’s wrong? Where are you hurt?”
Aisu whined lowly as I slipped out from under him and gasped. His entire left arm and patches of his back had been burned with a blistering sort of heat, and his right arm was twisted into an impossible position. “Stay still!” I commanded, grabbing my, thankfully, indestructible bag that Nerr had given me. I searched through it frantically until I grabbed a hold of a coarse, heavy scroll. I gestured to Hail as I pulled out the scroll and spread it wide.
“Will this work, Hail?” I asked, gazing into his hazel eyes. “I can use the scroll. I don’t want to tire you out.” Hail nodded hesitantly.
“Let me do it.” He said, his voice sounding strained. I shook my head abruptly.
“No. My mistake, my correction.” I snapped. I bit hard on my thumb until blood welled up and smeared it across the flowing script. I murmured quietly, forcing my energy into the dazed words and directing them strictly toward Aisu and his injuries. My heart wavered when Aisu nearly shrieked with pain. “Sh.” I murmured, stroking his hair. “Almost over.”
Relief surged over me as Aisu stood and tested his arm out gently. “It’s good.” Aisu said softly at my anxious expression. “It’s healed completely.” I relaxed at gazed sadly at Shinobi’s lifeless corpse.
“We’ll have to leave him, won’t we?” I asked softly. Aisu nodded.
“Yes, but we have to go. Now.” I nodded and looked to Aisu.
“Right. Of course.” I replied. Aisu looked to my pack mates and Archer hesitantly.
“You guys head out first. We’ll meet you by that empty alleyway we passed by.” The boys left quickly, the pitter-patter of their steps echoing into silence. I looked to Aisu, unsure of why he’d dismissed them while we stood here, at the sight of death and destruction.
“Why di-“ My question was abruptly cut off as Aisu pressed us closer and kissed me desperately. I froze at first and Aisu pulled away.
“Relax.” Aisu whispered. “I’m helping you.” I didn’t say anything, but when Aisu pressed his body close to mine, I submitted. It was completely unlike me to allow others to lead, but I did it. My body was alight with need as Aisu continued. Lust sparked greed, and soon my fingers were lost in the wild tangle of his hair. My body was pressed so tightly to his that there was no space between us.
“This place isn’t safe.” I said as we sucked in air to begin again. “We’ll be caught.”
“You’re too wound up. We’ll be safe. If you’ll relax a bit, you’ll be able to think more clearly.” It was too bad that Aisu’s good intentions were making my thoughts hazy and heavy with my craving for him. My thoughts swirled downward and settled into my actions. Where was my self-control, now? My pleasure in denying myself what I wanted most?
“Aisu…” I started, pulling away from him and resting my head against his shoulder. “…we need to go. We aren’t safe here.” Aisu growled lowly, his disappointment mixing with my own. We raced to the door, and I sent a last farewell to Shinobi before we jumped into the hallway and raced away, our footsteps deathly silent. They seemed far too loud to me, although I knew no one else could hear us.
Everything came to a halt as Aisu and I came to the entrance of the Armory to find two Warriors lying in wait for us. I set to work instantly, brandishing my sword and taking the more nimble of the two. I would’ve done anything, anything at all to protect Aisu, to protect Archer, to protect my Wolves. I shouted senselessly as we fought, the clangs of metal on metal infuriating me, reminding me of my all-too-recent Sacrifices.
The Warrior fell to the floor lifelessly as I spun on my heel to help Aisu. My sword collided with the Warrior’s gloves with the sound of screaming metal. Aisu ducked and nipped the Warrior’s heels until we cornered him into a crevice. Aisu leaped forward, his jaws snapping shut on the throat of the very tired Warrior. I pulled my sword away and heard a sickening crunch. I thought, at first, it was the Warrior’s throat. I then heard a whimper and realized that maybe, maybe I was wrong. Aisu’s flank was open, and dripping crimson onto the black and white tiles. With a furious yell, I finished the Warrior.
“We need to go.” I said urgently, helping Aisu up as he turned into a human again. “Give me directions. I’ll get us there.” Aisu moaned directions to me as I hurried us down the steps of the Armory. He winced as he moved and groaned as he struggled. It was too much for me to bear.
I Shifted and forced Aisu onto my back, where he ground out directions to me from behind his gritted teeth. I moved as swiftly and as gently as I could, given our circumstances, and made it to the alleyway in under five minutes. My pack mates stared at us in horror. Hail and Frost pulled Aisu off my back so I could Shift back into my human form. I couldn’t look at Aisu, not after I’d failed to protect him.
“Someone tell me what I’ve missed.” I said coolly, trying to apply the focus that had been drilled into me. Blizzard’s gold eyes instantly met mine and he began to speak.
“We’ve found Nerr and Kallen on the opposite side of the City from Archer’s Familiar. Rebel Forces have begun to pour in, and the Marked teams are coming to meet them.” Blizzard rumbled, his eyes flashing with concern. “Your cuff makes you a liability.” Anger sparked in my chest, and I tore my gaze away to study Hail’s bent over form that focussed on healing Aisu.
“It will come off. Don’t worry about it. I can handle myself.” I replied in a frosty voice. Blizzard met my new, cooler gaze with a rather heated one that brought waves of concern flooding over me. It’s my job to worry about you. Blizzard murmured.
It’s my job to make sure that our mistakes in this era are not repeated in the next one. I replied. Blizzard shook his head slightly.
You’re risking everything. Your life, your future... your friends and family. Blizzard said. I suppressed a smile.
I believe it has been said that we must be the change we see in the world. I countered. Violence isn’t what I want, but it’s what I’ve been taught. This is the only way we can change what’s happening, here and now. I don’t have time to wait for peace. I have to help create it.
Blizzard’s lips pressed themselves into a thin line. And if you die?
Then I have died for a cause I believe in. I winked at Blizzard. I’d hoped that you’d have more faith in me. Blizzard’s eyes widened slightly before he smiled.
I’m just covering all the possibilities. This time I smiled.
I’m far too stubborn to die. I replied, turning my gaze to watch Aisu twitch in pain. I’d rather die to protect the ones I love than to live knowing I could’ve made things better for them.
Blizzard didn’t say anything. I watched carefully as Aisu stood, supported by Hail and Frost. “There’s not time to heal it completely, we have to go.” Hail said urgently. My throat closed.
“Where will we go?” Sleet asked, turning to Blizzard. Blizzard turned to Archer, who turned to me. I sat down and scowled.
“Let me think. I haven’t been here in a while.” I said. I ran through all my memories of the Capital as quickly as I could, chanting silently the two numbers that confused me most: Fifty-nine, sixty one.
“I have it!” I said suddenly. “It’s a bit far for Aisu, but we’ll be safe until tomorrow. Warriors don’t go near it.” Aisu gave me a strained smile. I’m sorry, I whispered, I should’ve paid more attention. Aisu shook his head slightly and gave me a weak smile. My mind pictured the building as we hurried toward it.
It was a tall building, sometimes called a sky-rise, with glass windows that reflected the outside world and a steel frame that refused to yield to any sort of wind. Inside was a different matter. The building had been completely long ago, too long, it seemed, but it was strong and often left alone, waiting for someone to claim it as their own.
We went inside carefully as I lead us through the safe passageways. The white walls were bare on the bottom floor, and the floor itself was concrete, cold and hard. The windows on the inside were clear, and I ushered us up the stairs as quickly as we could go. We struggled to the highest floor- the thirteenth. This was my building, the one I had run to every chance I could when I was sent here.
My blood coated the walls and stained the floor in puddles and had sprayed across the windows on this floor. It was my floor, my territory. The scent of my blood was strong, but had faded with the breeze that drifted in through the single window I had shattered all too long ago.
“What’s this red stuff?” Archer asked softly. “It’s everywhere.” I paused in my steps for a few moments, surveying all the red-coated things in this room.
“Blood.” I replied, kicking at a reddish-brown puddle that had yet to lose most of its vibrant color.
“Whose?” He asked. I pressed my lips into a thin line.
“It doesn’t matter.” I said, using my staff to shatter another window so we could have more air in the stuffy floor. Archer materialized behind me.
“Whose is it?” I shook my head.
I sat down in the broken windowpane and allowed my legs to dangle outside the building. “I’ll show you.” I murmured, pressing Archer’s hands to my temples. “I’ll show you whose it is.”
A scream echoed, shattering the silence of the thirteenth floor- my floor. I knew the Warriors would come for me, I knew what they would do. There was blood everywhere here from the last few times I had escaped. It was smeared on the windows and puddled on the floor, sprayed across the walls and splattered in the halls. The window was broken here. I’d hit it with my fist and now my hand was dripping blood onto the floor. I didn’t care.
Now that the window was gone, it had opened a gateway in the building. A gateway to a great fall that would never leave me broken. It would also pass me along to a safer journey. The Warriors would kill me if I jumped... oh wait, they couldn’t.
I took a deep breath and watched as I stood on the very edge of the building, just a breath away from escape. A hand yanked me back from the edge and my stone face materialized into existence.
“What were you doing?” Breathed a breathless Warrior. I remained on the floor, my hand dripping crimson.
“Living.” I replied. I snapped my gaze to the Warrior’s tired eyes. “I was living.” The others who came afterward were not so kind. My red handprints marred the floor as I was dragged away and the blood that escaped elsewhere splattered across the room. I lost myself. I was drunk on hatred.
Archer scurried away from me instantly, gasping and pressing his hands to his shocked onyx eyes. I turned away from him and watched the cement so far below us. I couldn’t wait to jump. “Why?” Archer cried, his eyes leaking tears. I shrugged.
“It’s human nature.” I replied. “Humans are horrible, horrible beings made of death and destruction and worthy of hatred and fear.” Archer shook his head and embraced my torso. I froze, rigid and unmoving.
“Do you have a lot of scars?” Archer asked. I snorted.
“Do you?” I replied. Archer nodded.
“You’ve been Sacrificed, with training, how many times?” I asked.
“Sacrificed twice, trained seven times.” I nodded.
“I have more scars than you.” I replied. “I don’t know how many I have; I’ve never counted.” Archer then took it upon himself to count how many scars marred my lower back. He lost count quickly.
Eventually, he lost track of the number of times he’d lost track of losing track. It make my lips quirk. “Do you see the smoke and the flames, Archer?” I asked softly, pointing to the horizon. Archer nodded quickly.
“It’s horrible.” He said.
“No.” I replied. “It’s beautiful.” Archer scowled.
“How is destruction beautiful?” He asked innocently. I smiled.
“This isn’t destruction. This is change, Archer, beautiful, beautiful change. This is the weak, the tormented, the tortured rising up and screaming to the world: ‘We’re alive! We’re here and we won’t back down!’. It’s so beautiful, Archer.” I murmured.
Archer frowned. “It’s horrible.”
I smiled. “It’s the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen in my whole life.”