The Sacrifice [Undergoing Editing]

Chapter 21: Death for Snow? I Think Not

Hail backed away from me, before sitting down, his head in his hands. I looked at Hail curiously. "Why am I going to die?" I asked. Of course, I know what it is to die. I understand the concept.

"Mistress... you've pushed yourself much too far with that cuff on!" Hail said, his voice rising. I shrunk backward. "I keep telling you not to push yourself, but you do it anyway! What do I have to do to get you to listen to me?! Are you deaf? Are you dumb? Stop pushing yourself!" I felt myself shake and a wetness trickled down my face. I rubbed it away and looked at it.

Was that a tear, hanging from my fingertip? A tear, something so taboo, that I hadn't cried in years? I felt a pressure in my throat, like it was closing tightly, cutting off my air. I felt like I was choking. I gulped, trying to swallow the lump in my throat. I blinked slowly, as Hail continued to yell at me. Why did this hurt? Why was I crying?

Sleet, Aisu, and Frost looked on in horror, shifting their gazes from Hail to me every four or five seconds. I swallowed again. "Hail..."

"Shut up! Let me finish!" Hail shouted.

"No! You shut up! Stop it, Hail!" I screamed, placing my hands over my ears. I pulled my knees to my chest, before letting out a shuddering cry. "Stop yelling at me! Why are you doing this? Why are you shouting at me?" Hail froze as I looked up to him, my vision blurred with tears.

"Oh no..." Hail said, "No, no no! Mistress, I'm so sorry! I didn't mean to yell at you... I'm-"  Hail sighed, and crouched down beside me. "Mistress?"

I covered my ears and shut my eyes. "Stop it! Don't talk to me!" I curled up tighter. "Stop!" Hail reached out, about to touch me, as I shrank away. What kind of Alpha was I if I couldn't control my pack? If I allowed them to yell at me? What kind of Alpha was I if I could be pushed this far? "Please leave me alone." I said softly, wiping my face and standing with my last remaining strength. I shifted and shot forward, into the woods.

Darkness loomed closer to me, just at the edges of my vision. I knew that soon I wouldn't be able to continue or hold my wolf form. Shivers ran through me as the wind blew harshly threw my fur. I let out a howl, letting it echo loudly. I bounded up a grassy slope, before shifting as my strength at last gave out.

I curled up on my side, shaking. I was a terrible Alpha. I had let one of my Betas hurt me, make me show weakness. I couldn't stand that. Crying is not something that shows strength. Crying shows that you're weak, that you are breakable. This is why I never cried. Because I never, ever wanted to seem weak, breakable, because I always forced myself to be stronger than the others.

"Snow...?" I opened my eyes, forcing them to focus on the faces that blurred before me. Two pairs of eyes watched me, one set a glowing hazel, the other an eerie blue-green.

"What are you doing here?" I asked softly.

"Well we have three guys fighting... actually two and one curled up rocking back and forth..." Nerr started.

"We were worried about you." Kallen finished. I looked at them curiously.

"You shouldn't be worried about me." I said, pushing myself up, yet failing miserably to stay up. "Don't worry about me."

"Snow?" Kallen asked.

"Yes?"

"I think there's something I should tell you. I guess you could say I trust you enough." Kallen said, her eyes slightly troubled. Nerr's face went passive.

"I'll just keep a lookout for the guys." Nerr said, summoning Lurri and walking just out of earshot. Kallen smiled faintly.

"What do you want to tell me?" I asked curiously. Kallen looked at me again, her eyes distant.