The 16 Step Plan To Become Si...

By ilylilyevans

83.9K 3.3K 11.2K

"Just because he fancies blokes doesn't mean he fancies this bloke!" ~~✩☽~~ wolfstar with a sprinkle of jily ... More

Step 1: Become Friends With Remus Lupin
Step 2: Stay Friends With Remus Lupin
Step 3: Disown The Name Black
Step 4: Admit Feelings
Step 5: Flirt
Step 6: Recruit James For Help
Step 7: Try Step Five Again
Step 8: Initiate Operation Lames
Step 9: Ask Out Remus
Step 10: Ghost of Crushes Past
Step 11: Time Travel Is Bullshit... Right?
Step 11.5: Time Travel Is Definitely Not Bullshit
Step 12: Go Out With Remus
Step 13: Heartbreak
Step 14: Un-Break That Bitch
Step 15: Questions
Step 16: Become Sirius Lupin
Operation Beth Lupin
The First Instance Of Wolfstar
The Christmas Duck
Exploding Zonkos
....so who did you sleep with?
Sequel??
Sequel!!
SORRY THIS IS THE LAST THING ABOUT THE SEQUEL I SWEAR

Storytime with Lily Evans

1.3K 71 30
By ilylilyevans

Idea from Ravenclaw_geek13

~~~

"Alright, what are we doing? Telling stories? What's this for?"

"For History of Magic, Mum."

"Hey! I'm not that old!"

"I know, I know, I'm joking! It's for George and Fred, they want inspiration from dad's mischief or something. I figured I would ask you instead of dad, because dad would glorify it. No offense dad."

"None taken, Prongslette."

"Alright now everyone hush. I'm starting the camera." Lily pushed the start button on the muggle camera with a click and started talking as soon as the red light started blinking.

"Hello, I'm Lily Evans Potter and I'm here to tell you about my idiot husband and his idiot friends."

James scoffed and Lily threw a pillow at him.

"Anyways, one time, he decided to ask me out with candles. He put, oh, probably 100 candles all over the Gryffindor common room in fourth year and stood in the middle holding a bouquet of lilies. Don't get me wrong, it was sweet, or, it would've been sweet if he hadn't knocked one over and set the entirety of Gryffindor tower on fire. It took a week to rebuild it and we roomed with the Hufflepuffs during that time.

"Another time, he came to my house over Christmas break and pretended to be a caroler so that Tuney wouldn't come to the door while he was asking me out. She did anyway and slammed the door in his face.

"I think the moment I realized James wasn't so bad was when I walked into the common room one night after prefect rounds, near the end of fifth year. I heard this really really loud music coming from the Marauders dorm, so I went to see what it was. I knew it wasn't Remus, because he was in the common room reading. When I asked him what was happening, he told me he needed to escape the pining. It wasn't Sirius, he had detention, and Peter wasn't pining after anyone as far as I knew. So that left one person. James bloody Potter.

"Anyway, my curiosity got the better of me and I walked up to the dorm door. I opened it, quite loudly actually, but James didn't hear. Because you know what he was doing? He was in the middle of a mountain of blankets, eating Oreos and singing along to Til There Was You, which was playing from the record player, at the top of his lungs. I started laughing hysterically, of course, and he finally noticed me. He threw an Oreo at me, called me a git, and continued singing along. I sang it to him every time I saw him I saw him for a week after that. It was brilliant."

James scoffed. "Was not! It was humiliating!"

"But hilarious."

"Fuck you."

"Children are present!"

"Mum, I'll be honest, I don't fucking care if you swear around me."

"Oh, thank Merlin. Swearing is bloody fun." Lily snorted. "Hm. Somehow, this turned into a 'ways to get Lily Evans to fall in love with you' video."

"I'll help!" James pushed Lily off of the chair she had been sitting on and took her spot in front of the camera.

"Hello, boys! Tis I, the famous Prongs. I'll tell you about some mischief! One time, we snuck ou-" Lily narrowed her eyes at James. "I mean... left the school with permission through a secret passage, and we nearly blew up Zonkos! It was bloody brilliant, I'm telling you..."

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