Mr. Whitfield- By: Riley Rivers

Chapter XXI

Back in Mr. Whitfield's room, he had just fallen off the bed from sexing to close to the edge,
"Oh sh*t!" He exclaimed and tumbled off the bed onto one of his slimy loafers. "****!"
"Are you okay?" The woman asked.
"Can you hand me my glasses, so I can at least see what the hell I landed on."
"Here." She handed him his glasses and he put them on.
"Thanks, you're a dear."
"You're welcome."
"Aw hell no. Damn it! My ******* dog chewed on my damn loafers again."
"I'll buy you some new ones don't worry."
"Those were from my Mom before she passed."
"Oh, I'm sorry. Forgive me for being too personal but, what happened to her?"
"My Dad struck her with a metal pipe and killed her."
"Sh*t!"
"I know and due to unprotected sex my wife got T-O."
"Testeris Osillis?"
"Yep. That's why I'm wearing protection right now, so you don't have to suffer like she did."
"I appreciate that. May I ask if you would like to make another son or perhaps even a daughter?"
"I'd rather wait on that, due to a poor gene I received that may cause miscarriages."
"I have that gene too."
He gasped and nearly cried. "You're not joking?"
"Nope."
"Huh, we have a lot more in common than I thought."
"Yeah."
"So no more kids?"
"No, for now. One is plenty of a handful for me. Besides, I think Nicole would-"
"Enough about your dead wife."
He sobbed, feeling very apprehensive at her presence. Even though his wife was dead, he didn't like people to point it out for him. "Don't point out something I already know."
"Well. She is dead and so is your Mom."
"Shut up."
"They're both dead. D-E-A-D."
"Stop! Now I'm getting pissed."
"They are dead, Jesse. Dead."
"Ergh! Please shut up!"
"Dead, dead, deadly-dead, dead."
"Shut the **** up!"
"I was just pointing out the-"
"I don't care! You made me extremely uncomfortable. Get out of my damn house now!"
"But-"
"Now!"
"Fine I'll leave and I'm sure you'll regret it." She went into Nate's room and grabbed Natalie. "Come on we're leaving."
"Best friend we never fin-"
"We are leaving!"
"See ya. You bitch."
"Just so you know there's a name for people like us." Natalie gloated.
"What's the word, women?" Jesse answered and Nate snorted in laughter.
"It's true love, idiot!"
Nate gasped. "Never call my Dad an idiot!"
"Whatever, kid."
"She called me a kid, Dad. She called me a-"
"Shh, just wait for it."
"Goodbye, you assholes."
"**** you, **** you, **** both of you."
"Yeah and I hope both of you get satisfied, especially you, whore." Nate sneered, pointing at Natalie.
"What?" Jesse asked and Nathaniel Lee Whitfield shook his head.
"Nevermind, Dad. I'll tell you later." He whispered and the two ladies left out the door displeased.
"We deserve someone better than those assholes."
"Yeah, them bitches deserved ditches."
Mr. Whitfield chuckled to himself and smiled at his son. "You wanna um, doing something?"
"Like what?"
"I don't know. My Dad never played with me. Do you wanna play a game of some-sorts?"
"Dad, I'm thirteen. Nobody calls it playing anymore. It's called hanging out."
"Well, fine... An attitude like that makes me wish I never asked." He mumbled. "Let me ask this again correctly. Do you want to hang out with me?"
"Ehh, I think I'll play Dungeons and Dark Lords." Nate went inside and logged onto his old pc.
Jesse came in and unplugged it in a heartbeat. "You know back in my day, we never had the fancy-schmancy high tech G3 Apple Macintosh computers."
Nate rolled his eyes. "I know you're old and you found other ways to have fun."
Mr. Whitfield ignored his impertinent comment. "I did, I really did. I made board games out of cardboard scraps. I would take rocks for the dice, bottle caps for the game pieces, and any paper for the playing cards. You can tell I was pretty impecunious."
"Yeah."
"So do you wanna hang out? Watch a movie, play Bisk?"
"Bisk?"
"It's my version of Risk." Jesse laughed.
"Oh."
"What do you say?"
"Ehh, I think I'll look at my HotChiks magazines."
"You'll be missing out."
"No, I won't."
"Yes, you will." He picked up the cheap board game he made and began playing it, while his son looked at hot girls.
"Damn! Woowee Mama! Ay, yi, yi!" Nate's eyes got real big as he stared at a girl in a bikini. "Oh sh*t, she reminds me of Candice..." He flipped the page and put his hand on the picture. "One day, baby. One day. If I ever met a woman like you, I'd sex her right in a heartbeat." Nate made out with the image and his Dad got bored with his board game.
"Ugh. I forgot how boring this was! Nate's right, I am missing out." He walked into his son's room and saw him making out with the magazine.
"Mmm, baby how you're so sexy."
"Can I ask what the hell are you doing?"
"****! I didn't see you there. You caught me in a bad moment here. Sally and I were just about to hook up."
"You and your damn dirty mind."
"Hey, appreciate not hate. You have one too, Dad."
"Heh. Not as dirty as yours."
"So what if I make out with magazines!"
"A: that's weird, B: it makes me worry about you."
"Why should you worry?"
"You're kissing inanimate objects, does that not surprise you?"
"No, I've kissed that mirror I named Debbie about a thousand times a day."
"Now, that's just gay."
"I love myself."
"And you choose to name your reflection Debbie, why?"
"Because I love that name."
"It's someone you would date, I know."
"Yep."
"You're weird as sh*t."
"You are too, you know."
"Oh, I wish your mother was here." Nate's Dad rubbed his face with his hand and sighed. "I never really wanted another baby after that miscarriage before, but as soon as we married that's when I decided to stick my **** up your mother and create you in the womb. Of course when I did so, either the condom slipped off or it snapped off and that's how you got here. You were just a happy little accident."
"I bet Mom was pissed at you, ooo!"
"Nate, shut up." Jesse rolled his eyes.
"I love you, Dad." Nate hugged him.
"I love you too, son."
"Why don't we look at hot chicks and see which one we like?"
"Ok, that sounds like fun."
"Probably a lot more fun than that board game, heh."
"Yeah, actually that board game was pretty boring."
"I told you. If it's got the word 'board' in the name, it must be boring."
"Ha, ha, ha!" You make me laugh."
"It's what I do, Dad."
"You're good at making people laugh."
"I should probably be a comedian."
"More than likely."
"Pick up girls that way too."
"Anything to pick up girls, man."
"Yep. Ah, the spice of life."
"Didn't you mean slice of life?"
"Nope. Spice of life."
"Oh, okay."
"I call the purple magazine!"
"Damn, I love that issue."
"Too bad, so sad!" Jesse smiled and they skimmed through the magazines together.