29 Ways to Propose to Sirius Black

#24

Sirius stomps on a crack on the sidewalk, receiving an odd glance from Remus. "What?" he questions innocently. 

"You know that stepping on a crack doesn't actually break your mother's back."

"One can only wish."

Remus loops his arm around Sirius' elbow as they walk inside their flat. Both change into pajamas, ready to settle in for the night. A kettle is on the stovetop not too long after, as well as a game of Scrabble set up on the kitchen table. The peaceful evening Remus had planned, of course, was corrupted by the competitiveness of game night.

Sirius takes his usual seat and sips his tea with a calculating look. He places his letters on the board to spell telegram across Remus' previous word of tiara. 

"Good one," Remus says as he marks the score. 

"I know." Sirius crosses his arms as he waits for Remus to play. 

Remus smirks, placing his next word down. Colonel. His wand lies just beside him, under the table, ready to rearrange the letters to spell out: WILL YOU MARRY ME. Butterflies flutter in his stomach as he begins to move his wand and cast the spell. The letters shift every so slightly when -

"Wait," Sirius says, causing Remus to pause. The letters fall back into place. "What word is that?"

"Colonel," Remus answers. 

"That's not...there is no way that word is 'ker-null' - I call faulty play!"

Remus drops his wand, knitting his eyebrows together in confusion. "It's a word!"

"I don't believe it. There's no way it's spelled like that." Sirius gets up hastily in search of their Scrabble dictionary. 

Remus leans over the table and rakes his hands over his face in frustration. "Sirius we've been through this! Just because a word doesn't sound like it's spelled, doesn't mean it's not a real word! Just like h-"

From somewhere beyond the kitchen Sirius scoffs. He reappears with a book in hand and flips through the pages with narrowed eyes. "We agreed never to bring up the H word."

Remus rolls his eyes. "You mean hors d'oeuvre."

Sirius scowls and slams the book shut. Without another word, he places his next word down across Remus' C. Cricket. 

"So you discovered it's a real word then?" Remus questions playfully.

Sirius neither accepts nor denies the question. Only when Remus makes his next move does he grumble "Colonel my ass" under his breath.