TommyInnit x Reader, NEW KEY(DISCONTINUED)

~Jealousy~

--------------------------------------------Asher's POV---------------------------------------------

I smiled at the texts illuminating from my phone. Tonight Y/n was out at the fair with Tommy, or as she calls him, Bunny. I don't really understand that whole thing, I mean it is just a name. Anyway, I took this time to talk to him more.

I guess it was a bit strange for me to like this guy. I've known him for a year and a half and I don't even know his sexuality. He cuffs his jeans, but I mean fashion is fashion. Either way, even if it didn't work out between us he was always great to have around. I'm not sure if I should tell Y/n about it though. I love her, it's just... I don't know, hard? Not that it has anything to do with my sexuality, she is by no means homophobic. She hasn't said anything about it to me, but I see the way she looks at some girls. ;)

Back to me though, Y/n gets like 700000 chapters about her she can spare me one. I had been texting him all day, minus like an hour or two when he had to leave and go do something. He had just left to go to bed, leaving me smiling at my phone like an idiot. I sighed and glanced at my clock knowing that it was only like 11 pm-

"WHAT THE FUCK HOW IS IT 3 AM ALREADY" I shouted, but in a whisper voice as to not wake up my parents. I sighed, at least it was Saturday. I wasn't exactly tired tho, mentally sure, but physically no. I decided I'd chill out on my roof for a bit, I clicked on the first song that I thought of, Heather by Conan Gray. I laid on my back, staring at the stars and listening to the music.

Why would you ever kiss me?

I'm not even half as pretty

you gave her your sweater, its just polyester

but you like her better...

I wish I were Heather

The more I thought about it, Y/n was kind of like Heather. She is so absolutely stunning and everyone sees it. Eyes always lingering on her a bit longer than "just a glance." I craved for someone to look at me the way they did her, complete admiration. The song ended and I just let youtube autoplay through music and listened as it played some familiar songs. A bit later a song played that I didn't quite recognize, I liked it though, closing my eyes and letting the lyrics carry me away. 

I think this time I'm dying

I'm not melodramatic

I'm just pragmatic beyond any

reasoning for thinking I've got fucking rabies or something

I think this time I'm dying

I thought about my situation, I didn't even fully believe in love, yet I still found myself drawn towards the idea that it was true. especially after I had met him, but maybe I was just insane. Maybe I'm not even bi, maybe my attraction towards men is just the jealousy of how they could just effortlessly look good, and be seemingly confident all the time. Maybe I liked him, but as nothing more than a friend and my brain was just trying to ruin every chance of being fucking normal for even one day.

I think I've made my choice

I'm a disease playing victim

slip the fate slip the victory

I think I've made my choice

And why did she have to be so fucking oblivious? She could get any guy she wants wrapped around her fingers, for god's sake even Thomas Simons is falling for her and she is too blind to even see it.

Sink secluded in hatred

void the plans friends are making

I think I've found my voice

Who chose to make me like this? A naive hopeless romantic who doesn't believe they will find love, but continues to look? A friend of the perfect "girl next door?"

I'm a leech sucking blood bags

Taste defeat, it's a sandbag

Saline solution

My face felt warm, my vision blurry, but I knew I wouldn't cry. I hadn't cried in 3 years, but god did tonight bring me close.

Saline Solution to all your

Problems.

I let out a long shaky breath, seeing the smoke from the temporary heat rise into the air, my mouth being flooded with a colder replacement. I checked my phone to see who that was by, Wilbur Soot? I jotted it down in my notes and went back through my window, down the hall, and to my room. 5 am, I would probably sleep in a lot today.

I glanced at my phone again, smiling at the last exchange between me and him.

My Sunshine

Goodnight Asher!!

Ash

Goodnight, talk to you tomorrow Rian.