☀︎︎Featured on Wattpad's @NA and @FreeTheLGBT☀︎︎
* this is the original first draft. The rewrite is now also out on my profile! *
ᴏᴀᴋʟᴇʏ ᴄᴀʀʀɪʟʟᴏ was discovered at fourteen years old, being praised as a musical prodigy by the media ever since. His f...
"Oakley!" he warned, but my lips were still pressed against his.
"Shush. You're ruining it," I said, a huge smile on my face. I kissed him again.
"You're gonna be late," Nolan said softly as I pulled away, our foreheads still pressed together.
"I don't care." And just to accentuate my point, I kissed him again.
"Now go!" he said, pushing me away lightly.
I watched him as we drove away, the entire time he stood outside until he was out of sight. My entire mood shifted the further away we got.
I was falling so damn hard, and I honestly didn't mind.
•••
The awards were rigged. They had to be. I won best single of the year, which was utter bullshit. It should've been Gen, or literally anyone else.
"It's bullshit!" I yelled over the loud thumping of the music. "I mean, I don't even remember writing that song! It's so god damn immemorable that I don't even remember writing it! I literally wrote it one day at like two in the morning because I had this annoying ass melody on my head and now that annoying ass fucking memory made me win!"
"I hear you, Oakley," Hanna said, placing her hands over her ears. "Are you drunk?"
"What? No!"
"High?"
"No! There was only this one time I think it was in Amsterdam and I don't remember why I did it but I ended up in the hospital because I was starting to see things that weren't there but apparently that wasn't supposed to happen. They said I was just really really sensitive to psychosis so I never did it again. I mean, I don't understand the hype either way. And my mom was so mad at me when I accidentally told her during dinner on Christmas last year. She nearly made me quit touring and shit but dad and Trish reasoned with her but I swear to god if I ever get high again I'll be dead either because I either do something dumb or because my mom will kill me."
Hanna just stared at me for a few seconds with her jaw dropped. It took a while before she came to her senses. "So you're not drunk or high? Yet you're talking like you have a train to catch in two minutes."
"I'm not! I mean it might be because I'm happy because they wanted to release this new thing I did and I'm very fucking excited but also kinda scared because I don't exactly know how people are gonna take it, you know? Like, what if they hate it? That's basically like hating my life's work. I don't want them to hate my life's worth."
She was quiet for a while as Isla Barnett started announcing Gen will perform next. They asked me to perform too, but I refused. Fuck that.
"Since when do you actually talk to me again?" Hanna asked eventually.
I shrugged. Did it matter?
"Why wouldn't I?"
"Because I'm your ex? Aren't we supposed to hate each other or whatever? You're talking to me like we're childhood friends."
I shrugged again.
"You didn't really do anything to me. And I don't think I did anything to you."
She was quiet for a while as she just stared at me with her eyes squeezed together.
"You know I have a boyfriend, right?" I didn't. But it made me happy because it meant she wouldn't be going after me constantly anymore. She was a nice person to hang out with, but that was all she was to me.
"Really? Me too!" I said as I bumped her arm.
"You have... a girlfriend?" she asked.
Oh. Oops.
"Forget I said that!"
I turned back to the stage. Gen was gonna be the next one up and I didn't want to miss it.
"Wait, who?"
"I said forget it, Hanna." Nolan might not have said it, but I could tell he didn't want to be out yet. I wasn't going to make him do something he didn't want to.
"Oh my God, it's not Gen is it?"
She did this every single time.
"No!" I shuddered at the idea. Gen was adorable and beautiful, but ew. No.
"No?" She blinked. "Well, at least tell me something about her so I can guess."
"But I don't want you to guess."
"Why not? Why are you being so damn secretive about this?"
"Because it's none of your business! Why do you even care?"
"You know I still like you."
"You just said you had a—"
"Well, yeah. But —"
"I'm telling you this because I care, alright? Focus on your boyfriend."
She crossed her arms and rolled her eyes, but at least she did stop talking. Though I wasn't sure whether it was my comment that made her shut up, or the music that started. I could still feel Hanna's gaze on me—which was annoying as fuck.
I turned back around and I looked at her, trying to do the eyebrow thing Trisha always did. I failed miserably. I could tell by Hanna's laughter. A laughter that really easily died down to a sad smile.
I never got the chance to ask her about it, because Gen was already on stage performing. Dressed in a white skirt and top, increasingly dancing more doll-like as the song went on. But it wasn't until now that I realized I'd never heard the song in its entirety.
I fell down a rabbit hole, full of empty promises young me couldn't understand their plans were quite the opposite
Though I'm more than just a puppet, A doll to throw around You're not my puppeteer Can't make profit from my sound
I have told me story but I got rid of the strings I bet you really care, I hope you like what you see
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AUTHOR'S NOTE:
Guys im bored and tired and need to find a talent I can get rich with fast. I feel like such an underachiever 🙄
Anyways, question of the update: what's something you really wish you were talented at?
My answer would be music or dancing. I love music so much but I'm too lazy to actually learn to play an instrument.🙂 also my brain just can't memorize choreography, but I'm still trying!
