Hatred and Regret

Chapter 36: Regret

Eren POV:

I watched as the wall crumbled, still in silence. I felt my legs pulling me towards the school. Suddenly all the noise hit me in full force. I had to cover my ears as I finally registered the shouts of people and destruction.

Shit. Where’s Annie? I heard someone calling my name but I ignored it. I had reached the front gate of the school but didn’t see Annie. Suddenly someone grabbed me from behind. I turned around to see Annie and Mina.

They both looked shocked out of their minds. Mina opened her mouth to say something but her voice was drowned out by a deafening crack. I turned around to see the remnants of a light and smoke. And there, emerging from the smoke, I saw it. The sight of it instantly paralyzed me in fear. I remember what they were called in my nightmares. “Titans…”

Annie grabbed me, jolting me back to reality. Why? Why is it here? How can they even exist? Another flash of light. Annie started pulling on me. Right. We need to run. I turned around and started running. Annie was in front of me and Mina was behind. There was a pounding behind us. Is it chasing us?

Shit. Shit. Why? How? Is this what my dad was doing? Could I have stopped it? I was snapped out of my thoughts by a sight I couldn’t comprehend. I saw Sasha but it seemed like she was running towards us. Why is she coming this way?

I turned around to see the 10-meter person not too far behind us. Where’s Mina? I hadn’t stopped moving. Finally my eyes landed on Mina, she was on the ground and her shoulders were shuddering. Is she crying? Did she trip?

A blur went past my vision and it took me a second to realize that it was Sasha. I stopped in my tracks and prepared to turn around. Shit… nonononono. The titan was nearly on top of them. Sasha had gotten Mina onto her feet. They started running again.

They’re not gonna make it. I watched in horror as the titan took another step making the girls jump. Suddenly I felt shorter. There was a pain in my knees. I felt my eyes widen in horror. The titan had taken another step. I didn’t see Sasha. Huh? What happened?

I started shuddering violently as the realization that Sasha had just been stepped on seeped into me. I could no longer think straight. I forced myself to bring my eyes to where Mina had been, only to see that she was no longer there. I looked around for her, until something made me look up.

There was a blood curdling shriek. I looked up and realized why. The titan had Mina in it’s hand, she was flailing around, throwing her arms and legs around trying to get free. Fear seeped into my bones as I knew what was happening. My mind flashed with the memory of a nightmare. In this particular one I had seen Mina get eaten. I felt my mouth open. I heard incoherent shouts coming from my body. Am I screaming? It doesn’t sound like me. 

The titan started bringing Mina up to its mouth. My mind went blank as I watched Mina’s top half enter the titan’s mouth. Her screams were abruptly cut off. She’s dead… I didn’t even try to help her…

I was filled with despair. I saw Mina’s leg twitching in the titans hand. It was too much. I threw up on the spot. Suddenly someone grabbed my shoulder. I turned my head to be greeted by someone's kneecaps. Huh? I looked down to see that I was on my knees. My legs were cut up.

My jeans had a wetness on the thighs. It was then that I realized I was crying. I looked back up to see Annie. My eyes widened as I got back to my feet and started running again. My mind was racing. I almost stopped a couple of times because what just happened made me want to throw up and curl into a ball.

Could I have stopped this? What would’ve happened if I stayed with my dad? I was thinking of everything that could’ve happened. I started thinking about whether or not this was inevitable. I was so lost in my own thoughts that I nearly ran into Annie.

“What the hell? Why did we stop?” I was scared out of my mind, not just for myself but for everyone else too. I looked around Annie to see Armin, Mikasa, and Krista. Armin and Krista were catching their breath. This isn’t good. They could be on top of us in an instant.

As if on cue, a yellow light flashed to our left. Another one. All of our eyes widened simultaneously. We all started running again. I was behind Armin and Krista, Mikasa and Annie were side by side with me. My legs started to feel like lead.

There was a crash in front of us and I watched in horror as a titan walked out in front of us. Armin and Krista had gotten past it. It turned to look at us and we darted to where the titan had come from. When we passed it I saw Krista trip and Armin trying to pull her up.

The titan followed us down the street we ran down. I heard a loud crash as a gigantic foot appeared in front of me. It made all of us go airborne. I flew over the titans foot. As I hit the ground I saw Mikasa next to me.

I looked back up to see Annie in the titans hand. No… please....

My mind was racing. All my doubts formed into one emotion. It doesn’t matter if it was inevitable there were countless things I could've done to try to change the outcome. I watched as the titan threw Annie down it’s throat. I didn’t care anymore. My tears were no longer streaming. I felt calm.

I watched through half-lidded eyes as the titan lowered it’s hand towards me. I felt Mikasa jump over to me. She must’ve tried to push me out of the way. Her attempt was futile though. Instead the titan caught both of us in its hand. I didn’t even bother to struggle against it. Mikasa started squirming but eventually stopped. For some reason, instead of throwing us into its mouth, it brought us to its eyes.

I took in its features. It looked familiar. It had grey eyes, short black hair in an undercut. I brushed it off ready to accept my fate. I was no longer scared, the only emotion that filled me was regret. As ridiculous as it is, I blamed the whole situation on myself for not doing anything.

Mikasa shifted a bit to look at me. “Eren… I… love you.” I nodded as the titan dropped us into its mouth. We were dumped into a liquid, Mikasa didn’t come back up. My mind flashed with a missing arm. So this is where I was in that dream…

I felt the parts of my body in the liquid start burning. I looked around until my eyes fell onto some blonde hair. I turned the body over to see Annie’s half corroded face. My heart stopped. I pulled the remnants of her body towards me, cradling her in my arms. I will destroy these things, I swear. 

Eventually the pain started making my vision go blurry. The regret I felt turned into hatred. My vows to destroy these titans were still fresh in my mind as everything went black.

3rd Person POV:

“Alright Zeke, this is where we’ll found it. Our own country, Marley.”

A/N

I know a lot of you guys aren't liking how this just ended but I had planned on it since like chapter 10. I just wanted to try something different, besides that I just really like tragedy's for some reason. This is the last chapter, but there will be two epilogues to go more in depth with the ending and pull the story together.