#1 Severussnape March 17th 2019
#1 HarryPotter January 5th 2020
"Because what I want to do is wrong... and I don't trust myself enough to be seen with you in the public eye." His voice dropped to a whisper as he took a step away from me. I smiled, g...
Oops! This image does not follow our content guidelines. To continue publishing, please remove it or upload a different image.
It has been about a month since I spent the night in Fred's bed. A month of feeling hopeless, of looking at myself with disgust. Something I have never truly experienced before until now. It was strange, but it feels as though the way I saw myself up until now has always been a lie. A lie I was telling myself that I needed to be treated better. Even though the reality was I didn't deserve to be treated nicely at all. Not by any man, and not by myself either. I have been avoiding practically everyone, but mostly Professor Snape... and Ron. Since Fred has graduated he doesn't have the best access to Hogwarts anymore and I haven't planned on leaving the castle anytime soon, so he has resorted to asking his little brother to keep tabs on me. Basically. It's just been a few awkward conversations between Ron and I. Him asking me how I am feeling and me saying "fine." Both Draco and Harry have shown their concerns in... strange ways. Draco has gifted me a set of earrings and apologized for making a scene that night. He told me that whenever I started feeling up to it I could talk to him. It was sweet, but so far I haven't taken him up on that offer. Harry, on the other hand, hasn't said much but every night he will sit next to me in the common room and read out loud. Almost as if he is reading me a bedtime story every night. In some ways, I do appreciate it. But most of the time I just feel like hiding, like their presence makes me feel... I don't know. I like I don't deserve them.
Honestly, the only person I have even remotely talked to about how I've been feeling has been Hermione. Though, surprisingly she hasn't pressured me to talk more. It almost seems like she knows how I'm feeling and is worried that if she asks questions I may just feel worse. Which isn't wrong. It's just... so unlike me. I feel different like I'm a different person now. Maybe my heart is just broken. Or maybe, I'm broken. Perhaps to the point where I can not fix myself. That's how it feels at least. Then again, maybe Hermonie can relate because of her relationship with Ron.
It's currently supper time. And for the last several weeks I haven't been joining my friends at the great hall to eat. Instead, I've decided to spend my time in the Gryffindor Common room. Away from all of their worrying, silent glances and far away from the cold piercing eyes of the Potions Professor. That is, I thought I was alone until I heard the soles of someone's shoes frantically making their way towards me.
"There you are (Y/n). For goodness sake, is this where you've been during supper all this time?" It was Ron. Staring over me as I sat on the sofa. Looking like he was a disappointed father, making me feel a bit weird about the way he was acting.
"Is there a problem, Ron?" I unfolded my legs stretching them out so now my feet were touching the carpet.
"There sure is a bloody problem." I stared at him not knowing what to say, so I didn't say anything.
"You're telling me you don't see anything wrong with your behavior?" His voice raised slightly, I have never seen Ron so worked up, it was strange and a bit unsettling to me.
"It's been weeks (Y/N). You've been barely speaking to anyone, You've been ignoring my brother AND Hermione. Not to mention you haven't been eating! Don't think no one hasn't noticed, it's obvious by your sunken cheeks." Ron Started pulling muffins out of the pocket of his robe, handing them over to me.
