I Am Your Teacher (Severus Snape X Reader)

I Love You

I think the song at the top really decribes (Y/n) and Severus's love story :) SO if you like, give it a listen! <3

When we arrived back to the castle, Severus snuck me into his quarters. We were both speechless, stunned really. Neither of us knew what to say. I couldn't even begin to process my own thoughts at the moment. That is until I walked through his door. I turned around to face him, only to be engulfed into his hug. I felt his nose press into my neck as his embrace tightened around me. I tried my best to choke back my feelings as I held him just as close. As I ran my palms along his frame I felt his shoulders trembling slightly. I wanted nothing more than to make him feel better, but how was I supposed to achieve that when I feel the same way?

"I'm so sorry." My heart ached as I felt his words hit my neck in a hot breath.

"It's okay."

"But it's not, I never should have acted that way... And I feel awful about all of this... I'm sorry I have to leave (Y/n)..." I backed away from Severus as I cupped my hands on his cheeks, feeling the rough hair from his jaw poke my skin.

"It's alright. Let's just make the most of the time we have now okay?" I pushed back his smooth, black locks so that I could see his face better. His eyelids were slightly swollen, his nose tinted red, seeing him like this made my chest tighten. I had to figure out a way to make him feel better. If I could, I would absorb all the pain that he is feeling in a heartbeat. I would feel it all for him, I would do anything for this man... and I guess that's where we differ... That's why, eventually, this will have to come to an end. Not knowing what else to do, I slowly moved my face closer to his before softly placing a kiss on his lips. It took a moment before he returned it. I held his hands on my own as I separate us. I searched his black eyes, they looked as though they were holding on to me. He looked... scared.

"Severus, it's okay. Take a deep breath. Besides, you'll never know, maybe in three or four years will find each other again... but let's not ruin what we have now okay?" He nodded as he listens to me speak. I saw his eyes light up when I talked about getting together in a few years. Even though I said it... I didn't actually believe it would ever happen... I'm not sure I wanted it to. It's too easy for me to ignore my own needs for his... and I don't think that's a healthy relationship. I stood on my toes as I placed my lips lightly on his cheek. I could feel the light scratches from his five o'clock shadow press into my flesh. I smiled slightly, trying to show him that this was okay, even though I knew it wasn't. I was attempting to swallow my own feelings, trying not to let it show that this was killing me. I didn't want this to end, I wanted him to choose me... Yet, I could never ask him to do that, and I could never ask myself to put my own life on hold. But what if this is it?  What if this is the only man I could ever truly love... Then what happens if he leaves and never comes back? He'll find someone new and I won't... I could feel my lip starting to quiver so I held my lips firm putting an end to it.

"I should probably head to bed." I couldn't stand here anymore. I needed some time alone. As I walked past him, I felt his hands hold on to my waist. He was standing behind me as I felt him hug me from behind.

"No... please stay." I didn't turn to face him, instead, I just stood still before I nodded. I didn't trust myself to speak without giving away how I truly felt. Hell, I didn't even trust myself to simply talk at this moment. I love him... and this was going to be an extremely difficult road to go down, for both of us. I turned to him, holding him tightly while hiding my face from his view. I felt exhausted and I couldn't help but yawn as his arms wrapped around me. I shoved my fears down deep inside of myself, my emotions following. I stared at his face as I let a smile pull at my lips. Thankfully, that made him reciprocate my actions. That's all I wanted. I just wanted Severus to be happy.

"I'm tired... so I really should be heading out."

"Stay here tonight..." He spoke with such urgency he took me by surprise. It almost felt like he was scared to let me go. I watched his eyes dance between my own as if he was pleading for me to stay. I could never say no to him...

"Okay." I managed, my voice sounding faint as if it had come from a completely different person. He took my hand in his, leading me to his bed. I felt... awkward. I laid down stiff as a board as Severus copied my movements. He turned to look at me. Even though my eyes were focused on the ceiling I could feel his stare resting over the top of me. I kept my eyes focused above myself, searching the plainly painted ceiling, trying to find at least one imperfection in its creation. As I laid there, I couldn't help but be reminded me of the night by the whomping willow. This moment held so many similarities, including the thought of not being good enough for him. The only difference was, this time I had no hope. At least after all of this is over, we'll still have our memories together... I felt his fingers brush through my hair, causing the skin on the left side of my body to prickle in goosebumps. Without speaking, I rolled over into him, his arms finding their way around my form, managing to comfort me. I held my hands together, tucked into my chest as he pulled me closer. Even though our bodies were touching, I kept my hands far away. I was hurting... and I wasn't processing this very well. I wish I could leave, but his touch was like a drug I couldn't resist. Even though I know our actions could have the worst consequences, I can't help but want more. It didn't matter what we wanted though, we only have four more months to spend with each other.

"(Y/n)..." I heard his low voice rumble, causing me to look into his dark orbs. I still didn't speak. I just licked my lips, attempting to moisten them. Though my mouth was so dry it barely worked.

"I love you..." My eyes fluttered as I heard his words. I shifted in his arms uncomfortably as I sat up. I think I should probably go... I need some time to myself before I can handle this. It's all too much.

"Don't leave. I'm sorry..." He had pulled me back into him and again, I couldn't resist his touch. As much as I wanted to be alone, I couldn't help but want to be with him...

"Okay... Just-" I closed my eyes as I blew air from my nose, ashamed and afraid of what I was about to say next.

"Don't say that again... it's too hard..." I watched his eyes grow tired as I spoke. I didn't want to hurt him but that's how I feel. It was too difficult to hear. Everything about this situation is just, too hard.

"I won't"  His voice cracked as I wrapped my arms around him, trying to give him some sort of comfort. I felt awful, but that needed to be said if I was going to be able to make it through these next few months without completely breaking myself... We stayed entangled in each other's arms, resting our foreheads against one another's. As I fell asleep, I could feel his breath brushing my skin. His heart beating against my form... And... for a moment, it almost felt like I could feel the magic inside him... It felt like... it was mixing with my own. Could that even happen? Was it possible? Though, it was only for a split second...it calmed me. For the first time in my life, it felt like I had found my true home.

Now it was going to be taken away.

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This chapter is so sad to me. Like I can't!! I'll make sure the next chapter is more uplifting for you guys! Atleast I'll try! haha! :) Thank for read ing!!

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