Finding Abby

5

I turn to Ben with a sigh; tell him what uni I hope to get into because it's obvious Mum has no idea. "I can't wait to get out of here," I say, taking a stabbing glance at Mum. "I don't know if I'll like living in the city but my friend Minda's moving there too. I think I can get a scholarship with my swimming. Where did you study?" I ask him.

"She wants to be a writer when she grows up." Mum turns back to us. Her eyes seem glossed over.

I frown at her. "No, I don't."

Ben glances at me before he touches Mum's shoulder, nods at her menu. "Decided what you want to eat yet?"

Mum looks up at him with a glazed expression. What's wrong with her? I look down at my menu and study it without seeing it, wondering if she's about to break.

"Beef and Guinness Pie sounds good." Ben's pointing at things on the menu. "So many pizza choices."

"We're pretty sophisticated in old Koroit town," I joke while Mum hides her face in her menu.

"Hey" —Ben nods to the door— "is that your friend? Finn?"

I slump down in my chair. Great. That's the last thing I need. I swivel my head and catch Finn's eyes as he looks over at us. He's with his parents and sister. He's wearing a tidy looking red and blue checked button-up shirt. With his sandy hair all neat, he looks so nice. My cheeks start to burn at the thought of his gentle look as he bent towards me to kiss me in the car-park earlier.

He says something to his mum and comes straight over to our table and greets everyone with his cool-factor casualness.

"Any chance we can lock in a time for a spin in your van?" he asks Ben.

"Sure," Ben says.

"Sweet" —Finn beams around at us, his confidence restored— "I'll come 'round first thing, yeah?"

"Not too early," Ben chuckles. "I'm on holiday."

Before he heads back to his own table, Finn holds his phone up. He points to it and then to me. I get the idea. I still haven't messaged him. I feel the heat in my cheeks as I nod to him.

Mum watches as Finn helps his own mum with her chair then she turns to me with a questioning look.

I glare back at her over my drink and keep my mouth shut. As if I would ever tell her anything about my private life. She's only trying to make it look like she's interested because Ben's here. It's awkward. I know it's awkward. But this is the way it is between her and me.

My phone vibrates. I flip it over to read the message. It's Finn.

U ok? Just want to clear the air. I'm cool if you only want to be friends ...

I swallow down a gulp of relief and look over at him and smile.

He pulls a face and holds his spoon over his nose, pretending to be a koala, then turns back to his family.

Maybe I need to take Minda's advice.

Msge you later, I text back to him.

***

The rest of the dinner goes as awkwardly as the first part. Every time I try and find out something about Ben and Mum's past, Mum shuts it down or Ben changes the subject. I don't dare to mention the mixtape or ask about music because I don't want Mum to get suspicious I do, however, find out four things about Ben that I file in the back of my head for later:

1. He's working to save the Great Barrier Reef from extinction.

2. He plays guitar in a band.

3. He's not married and never has been.