CHAPTER 4
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Logan's Point of View:
The name, just the mere mention, was like a giant punch to the stomach. The myriad of emotions that followed -all the old bitterness, confusion, anger, and hate resurfaced with a vengeance- felt like a painful explosion within the tight confines of my chest. The unwelcome yet familiar need to violently lash out and destroy everything within my vicinity, as I once did before, also resurfaced and it took everything inside of me to quash such an uncivilized desire and to not be driven by my violent impulse. As a result, my heart, felt as though it was being crushed within the hard grasp of an iron fist, yet somehow I managed to outwardly maintain my composure.
"What?" I asked, staring down two pairs of probing eyes. My guess, they were anticipating -albeit not joyfully- a replay of my previous response, fortunately, they were not going to get one. Wanting for anyone -even my best friends- to re-witness the disgraceful loss of control I displayed on that unfortunate day, was not on my list of priorities.
"Are you okay?" However, Alex's concern was a telltale sign that my so-called composure didn't work.
"Why wouldn't I be?" I answered firmly, inwardly angry at being so easily read. I was convinced that after the time that had transpired, I had somehow managed to successfully hide my reaction to that name and its bearer. But my friend's reactions stated otherwise...well, we have been best friends since pre-school, expecting anything less of them would have been an insult. But that did not make it any less angering.
"Because we know you're not," Rom answered in a matter-a-fact manner.
"I'm fine," I refuted, ignoring all of the turmoil raging inside of me. "just wondering," I continue after finally managing to block and lock away my emotions, "isn't the little guy and his cousin thicker than thieves?" Outwardly, I had completely reverted back to my earlier relaxed state, but they both still appeared wholly unconvinced.
"Log, do not try to play this off. Are you sure you're ok?" The question came from Alex after another long stretch of silence.
"My, how quickly the tide has shifted." I teased. "Mere moments ago, you were threatening my person with bodily harm, and encouraging someone to file a sexual harassment suit against me, now you're all 'Log, are you ok?' Careful Alex, I might believe that you actually care for me and that knowledge in itself is a scary one to even think about, so please stop."
"Be serious, Logan... If you need to talk..."
"I am being serious, you worrywart. And no, I don't. Thanks but no thanks." I then turned to Rom, "So what happened to the little guy?"
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Romance'There was never a time, a place, or a need to show your flawed-self when creating the perfect representative to speak for the broken you, was the solution.' We have all in one way or another, at one point or another lived our lives donning on masks...
