For Forever ~Lams YouTube AU~

Chapter 24

There is actually a trigger warning in this one but I put it right before the section because I don't want to spoil the chapter

John pov~

I woke up at around 5 to the sound of my phone ringing. I grabbed it and looked at the screen, ignoring the notification from YouTube.

I didn't recognize the number, so I picked up just to make sure it wasn't important.

"Hello...?"

"Hello? Is this Mr. John Laurens?"

"Yes, why do you want me?"

"It's the hospital, I'm calling to talk about Mr. Alexander Hamilton."

It was weird to hear the caller use Alexander's last name, and I knew he didn't like being called 'Mr.', but I was intrigued so I said nothing of it. "What about him? Is he ok?"

⚠️Trigger warning⚠️: death

"I'm sorry sir... Alexander Hamilton passed away."

I dropped my phone and put my face in my hands, feeling tears start to trickle down my cheeks.

"No no no no no no no no no." I tugged at my hair and pinched myself, praying that this was just a dream. "No he's not... I'm dreaming. No no no no no."

When nothing happened I growled and tossed my phone at the wall, hearing a heavy thud as it hit the wall then fell to the ground.

"God no." I picked something else up to throw. It ended up being a pillow and was very unsatisfactory to throw. "Why?"

I flopped back on my bed and growled again, arms going limp as the realization settled in.

It's my fault.

I didn't notice soon enough that he was sick.

Goddamit, it's my fault.

Please, god, let the diagnostic be wrong.

I stood up, grabbing my shoes, not caring to leave a note for my siblings, and raced out the door downstairs to drive to... somewhere.

Somewhere to just think and process.

I parked my car and went to a park, sitting on a bench and tugging my knees against my chest, feeling tears rush down my face.

—~•~—

Judging from the change in the light, I assumed I'd been out for about an hour.

I stood up and headed back to my car, not bothering to wipe away my tears.

There's no point.

I got in the driver's seat and drove to the hospital. I felt like I was moving in slow motion, everything was laden with sadness. I followed a tiny flicker of hope to the hospital.

The hope seemed to illuminate the building, as if trying to find room 37 and light up the features of a certain red headed YouTuber, finding him very much alive.

I sighed as I parked my car and got out, walking to the building. I walked up to the man at the front desk.

"Excuse me?" I stood behind the desk awkwardly.

"How can I help you?"

"Can you tell me... is Alexander Hamilton here?" I wanted to run away before I got my answer, clinging to the small rat of hope.