Shits and Giggles

Saturday Night

TONI POV:

I walk into my room and take off my tie. "Fuck! If I have to hear another thing about someone's fucking... rich bullshit I'm gonna shoot them!" I say lying on the bed. Cheryl straddles me. "Do you need some stress relief?" She ask kissing my neck. "Define stress relief." I say smiling. "Well, I need down too so just sex." I kiss her. "Protection?" I ask quietly. "No." I look at her. "I'm on the pill and honestly if I get pregnant than as you said, we deal with it." I smile. "Cool." I pull her into a kiss. "We'll get the morning after pill." She whispers. "So hot."
I say sarcastically. "I know right?" She smiles. She takes off my shirt. "Fuck! Those abs are amazing!" She rubs them. "Not as great as your boobs." I whisper. I take off her shirt and kiss her boobs. "Fuck babe." I get hard and take off both our pants. I slide into her. "Fuck!" I groan. I hold her and flip us over. I thrust faster. We both become a moaning mess and we both cum. I pull out and lie next to her. "Fuck!" I smile. "You ok?" I ask her. She smiles. "Always." I look at her. "I have a serious question." I nod. "Have you though about it?" She ask quietly. "About what?" I say confused. "Drugs?" I shake my head. "No." I whisper. "I don't plan on doing drugs or drinking alcohol or anything stupid like that." I tell her.

I walk into the bathroom. "Toni! I need to use your bathroom!" Sarah says walking into my bathroom. I grab a towel and cover my dick. "For fuck sake! Knock." I yell. Mom walks into my room and bathroom. "I need to talk to you guys when you're done yelling at each other." She whispers. "I already know he's my dad, but he's legally my brother and it's not as weird if I flip him off." I smile. "Both of you get the fuck out I'm butt ass naked!" I say kicking them out. They both leave and Cheryl pops her head out of the shower. "You told her?" I nod. "She took it better than I thought." I smile. "What do you think you're mom wants to talk to you guys about?" She ask quietly. "Who knows." I say quietly while taking a piss. "Ow!" I groan. "You ok?" She ask quietly. "I think you bruised my balls." I whisper. "Doing what?" She ask confused. "Sleeping in the same bed as me." I say. "Did I kick you in the balls?" I nod. "Twice." I say biting my lip. "No sex until I don't need a ice pack on my balls." I tell her. "Not even a little something for me?" She ask quietly. "I'll think about it while my balls are healing." I say quietly. She groans. I walk back into my room and grab a pair of underwear. "I love you baby!" She yells. "I love you too!" I smile. She gets out and drops the towel. "Fuck babe. Still, no sex." I say walking out. "Fuck you!" She flips me off. "Yeah yeah! I have to go talk my mom about some bull shit my father did." I say going downstairs. "What did dad do?" I ask quietly. "Do you know what pants are?" Mom ask. I shake my head. "No.
What the fuck did dad do?" I ask again. "Have a drug and alcohol addiction." She nods. "Finally the divorce we've been suggesting for 7 years now." I say happily. "Yeah actually." She says. I look at Sarah and she smiles. "Finally!" I smile. "I'll get the paperwork." I say getting up. "No! You're gonna get pants and take Sarah to school." Mom says. "I'm mom 13!" Sarah says frustrated. "Oh so you are calling me mom?" Mom ask confused. "Yeah! You adopted me and I don't feel like calling grandma and I don't feel like calling Toni dad!" She gets up and leaves for school. "Toni? What's new with you?" Mom ask quietly. "My balls hurt." I say getting coffee. "Do you want this?" I ask her. "No. Are you ok?" She ask. "Yeah. I never really got along with dad and I kinda hate you because you don't know how to raise my kid." I whisper. She looks at me. "Now if you'd excuse me, I'm gonna go live my god damn life."

I wake up to Cheryl throwing up. I get up and check on her. "You ok?" I ask quietly. I look at her. She shrugs. I sigh and grab a pregnancy test. "I've been home long enough for you to be possibly pregnant." I whisper. "I just peed." She says quietly. "That explains the vomit next to the toilet." I say. She smiles. "As I was peeing I threw up." I nod. "I'll clean it up." She whispers. I shake my head. "No! I got it." I tell her. I get up on the step stool I use to have for Sarah, pull down my shorts and pee. "Really?" She ask quietly. "You're the one with vomit on the floor."

Cheryl paces the room. I pull her close. "Hey! Stop freaking out! We've been talking about having kids for a while, I know this is a little unexpected but it's ok because I love you and you love me and we'll figure this out as we go." I tell her. She nods. "You're right." I smile. I pull her into a kiss but quickly pull away. "You still taste like puke." I whisper. The timer goes off and Cheryl grabs the test. I look at the test. "Positive." I say quietly. "The fuck does that mean?" I ask quietly. She smiles. "I'm pregnant." She whispers. "But we should go to a doctor, just in case. It's possible it's a false-positive." She explains. "Holy shit I'm gonna be a dad." I whisper. "For real this time." I smile. "I would kiss you but I taste like vomit." She smiles. I stand up and hug her. "We really gotta get our own place." I whisper. "I have a place we can go." She cups my cheeks. "You sure?" Cheryl nods. "Let's go." I look at her. "R-right now?" I ask. She nods. "Wait can you brush your teeth?" I ask quietly. She smiles. "Yeah."

I walk into the apartment. "Fully furnished?" I ask Cheryl. She nods. "Yeah!" She kisses me. "It's close to the shop and my parents house. Well, I think it's now my mom and sisters house." I say happily. She laughs a little. "It's close to the nursing home so you'll be near Nana Rose." I tell her. She nods. "It's right down the street from Pops." She says. "How do we get this place?" I ask quietly. "Ah! You need to sigh the paperwork." I nod. "How many bedrooms?" I ask. "3. I figured Sarah is gonna be here, since you can't spend more than an hour apart from her." I smile. "Yeah."