Two Broken Hearts

Part 3

Perhaps someday I'll crawl back home, beaten, defeated. But not as long as I can make stories out of my heartbreak, beauty out of sorrow -- Sylvia Plath

Sanem worked all day Saturday on her book, she wanted to make sure that she gave Yigit the story she wanted told, the way she wanted it told. Yes, the world would once again read about her heartbreak, but then it seems that the world falls in love with those who are hurting the most.

This was the last book she had to write under the contract she had with Yigit and she was thrilled to be ending that relationship. He was wanting more of her time and she was becoming increasingly more uncomfortable in his presence.  She had the number of several different publishers, even the one Can had given to her. So, when and if she decided to write another book, she would be doing so with a different publisher.

 With Yigit pushing to be more involved with her personal life, demanding more of her time, the more distance she wanted and needed to put between them. So she was taking this weekend not only to finish the book but to decide what her future would be at the publishing house. She knew she didn't have to work because of the money she made from her first book but she enjoyed working especially when she was at Firki Haraki.

She knew Can had read her first book, Leyla told her Emre had asked him. She told her, Can said he knew the truth, well, most of what happened and he needed to read the rest. Maybe he would read this one also, after all, that is the reason she wrote this story. She hoped, even though she lost him, that he would read this book and finally know why she gave Fabri the scent.

After sitting and working so long, she needed a break so she decided to take a walk before she went over her words one last time.

The evening was cool so she wrapped a shawl around her shoulders and went to sit in the hammock. She loved this time of night, the sky painted with all the glorious colors of reds and pinks with a little blue sky still slipping through. Then finally, all the colors fading until the sky was dark and full of stars shining bright.

The sway of the hammock caused her eyes to grow heavy, she was so tired, exhausted from working long hours and not sleeping well. She thought she would just lay down for a second and rest before she walked back inside.

Suddenly, she felt someone picking her up and carrying her away. Strong arms wrapped around her tiny body holding her close to a rock hard chest. She was warm and safe within these arms and she nestled a little closer, rubbing her nose in the neck that smelled so familiar. She turned her head one way and then the other until she found the spot under his chin and over his heart, then she became still. Her eyes were so heavy, she could not open them but she was not concerned, the man holding her would not let anything happen to her. She felt him as he laid her back down, felt him place his lips on her forehead and leave a kiss. He moved her hair away from her face and covered her with the shawl she had been wearing, she shuddered as she felt his warmth leave her. She reached out to grab his hand but found nothing but air,  no one was there.

Sanem awoke with the sun shining on her face, her body sore as she stretched out. She blinked her eyes a few times to adjust to the sunlight. She looked around and seen she was still in the hammock. It had all been a dream, it was a dream, all a dream. When would these dreams leave her alone, they left her feeling sad, but she wasn't sure she wanted them to end because the dreams were all she had left. The only way she would be held in his arms and feel his love.

She got up and walked back to the house, Cey Cey was running toward her, nervous and jumping around.

"Sanem, I have been looking for you forever."

"Ah, Cey Cey, I am here, a little sore and cold from sleeping outside, but it was the best sleep I have had in a while." He looked at her a little funny, tilting his head as if to ask why she was sleeping outside in the cool air.

"Your phone has been ringing for an hour, first Yigit, then your mother, then Yigit again."

"I told him to leave me alone this weekend." she sounded frustrated that he would call her after being told not to. "He is becoming too pushy about being in my space. I will shower then call them both back. I can't deal with them without tea."

While Sanem showered, Cey Cey made them both a cup of tea.  When Sanem came out, she took several sipes, then called her Anne. They talked for almost an hour, long enough to satisfy her mother that she was ok. Then she made herself phone Yigit to see what he wanted.

"Yigit, I noticed I missed some calls from you, what do you need?" she said with irritation in her voice.

"I was just wondering how the writing was going and to offer to come help you again."

"Thanks but no, I just have to proof read then I will be finished." she answered him " And as I told you I will bring it to you on Monday."

"I know, but I thought you might want me to be with you."

"Why would you think that?" She was becoming more irritated as they spoke "Yigit, I have told you that I do not want you in my personal life. You are my publisher and nothing more. My weekends are for me and no one else. I will talk to you on Monday and not before." with that she hung up the phone and blew out a short breath. "Well, I guess I know what I need to do on Monday."

Cey Cey was sitting in the chair laughing. She turned to look at him and busted out laughing also.

"I love that you are speaking your mind more, Sanem, it is good for you to not hold it in." he smiled at her "I don't care for Yigit, there is something a little off about him."

"Ah, Cey Cey, you are good for my mental health. How about I fix breakfast and then I finish my writing and we go to the market."

He nodded in agreement.

After they had eaten and cleaned up, Sanem went back to the table to finish the book. She finished proofreading, made the changes she needed to on her computer. Now all she needed to do was write the dedication.

She thought for a few minutes, wrote what she needed to say, closed the journal and got up to find Cey Cey.