Does He Feel the Same Way? (Kirito x Reader)

New Years Kiss or New Years Miss

Your POV~

       Today I was spending New Years with Kirito. I was relieved when he actually said yes. I looked out my window and saw Kirito. "I'll meet you outside in 30 minutes, okay?" I told him. He gave me a thumbs up and I smiled. I don't know what had gotten into me but I wanted to be pretty tonight...for him. So I applied mascara and eyeliner and got all dressed up. I chose to wear a white fitted sweater and dark skinny jeans. I tied the laces on my black keds and curled my hair. After looking in the mirror and literally did a double take. I actually thought I looked pretty. I smiled and walked out the door.

Kirito's POV~

        When the door opened to (y/n)'s house I didn't recognize the girl who came out at first. Then after I got a clear look at her face, I realized with a start that it was (y/n). She was always beautiful but dang, I didn't think she could look better than she already did. Only when she looked away, blushing, I realized that I had been staring at her and I felt my own face grow hot. "S-So do you want to go to the park now?" she asked. "Yeah, sounds good." I smiled at her. She blushed more but gave me a smile and looked away to try and hide her blush.

          On the way there, I had been glancing over at her the whole time, not able to look away from her. A faint blush stuck on my face. "Hey, Kirito." (y/n) started. "Y-yeah?" I asked. "There's something really important I needed to tell you tonight Kirito but I don't know what I should do about it. I decided that after tonight I would make the final decision...You see-"

Your POV~

          "(Y/n)? Kazuto?" I heard a familiar voice call. I turned to see Asuna waving at us. "Wow, (y/n) you look so pretty~!" she said. "T-Thanks!" I smiled at her. "Are you two heading to the park?" she asked. I nodded. "Do you mind if I joined?" "Oh, no. Not at all." I told her. She smiled and walked on the other side of Kirito for the rest of the way there. I'm happy that Kirito included me in the conversation though.

          When we got there, we sat on a bench that was clear of any crowd. In fact, we were the only ones there. 'Will Kirito be my New Years kiss...with Asuna here?' I wondered and I felt my face grow hot at the thought. "So (y/n), where's that guy that you like?" Asuna asked. "HUH?!" Kirito and I asked in union, both of our faces red. "You know, you said there was a guy that you-" Asuna started but I covered her mouth with my hand. Kirito just looked at me, a flash of pain was present on his face for a moment. 'Why can't I just tell him that he's the one I love?!' I wondered as I looked at his face.

         That's when the countdown began and they started chanting the numbers as I looked to the side and quietly observed, caught in my own thoughts. 3. I looked over at Kirito. 2. He looked over at me and smiled. Now is what will answer my question. 1. Asuna kissed Kirito. I looked over at them as they finished and Asuna smiled at me. I smiled back, trying to hide that pain behind it. Kirito then looked over at me and opened his mouth to say something but was interupted by Asuna. "(Y/n)? W-what's wrong?" she asked.

         I only realized that I was crying when I faintly heard a tear hit the bench. I wiped the tear and tried smiling. "Oh, I didn't even realize I was crying." More tears came. 'Why am I such a cry baby?' I wondered. I wiped the tears but more filled their place. Asuna and Kirito had worried looks on their faces. "...Did something happen with the guy you like?" she asked. I was done at this point. I had chosen the answer. "...I guess you could say that. It turns out that he likes someone else, not me. He...he just kissed another girl...and I saw." I tried for a smile. Asuna and Kirito both started to look around, trying to find anyone else. Of course they wouldn't. I got up from the bench and started to walk away while they were looking in the other direction. "(Y/n)? What do you mean he kissed someone just now and you saw? There's no one else around us." Asuna asked. "Yeah." I muttered.

        I felt someone grab my wrist and I turned to face them. It was Asuna. "Who are you talking about? Only Kazuto and I kissed." she said, confused. "Yeah." I repeated. She loosened her grip on my wrist. "Wait. Don't tell me that the guy you like is...Kazuto..." she realized. I couldn't take it. Tears fell at a faster rate. "Yes. Kirito is the guy I'm in love with. The guy I've always been in love with!" I told her. "Then...why didn't you tell me?" she asked, disbelief on her face. "Because I knew he liked you. You're prettier and far more kind than me. Any guy would be lucky to have you, honestly. I'm happy for Kirito...that a girl like you can be with him and make him smile." I finished. Asuna released her grip from my arm and hugged me. "(Y/n)...I'm so sorry. I didn't know. If I knew I wouldn't have-" she started. "If you knew, nothing would have changed." I said. "But I don't want it to end this way!" Asuna cried. "It's okay. We're still friends, we always will be." I told her and smiled, despite myself and the situation. I smiled and waved, then started walking again.

          "(Y/n)..." Kirito called. I turned to face him. "Why didn't you tell me?" he asked. "Because nothing would have changed..." I told him. He opened his mouth to say something once again but I stopped him. "I'm sorry Kirito. To leave it this way. I...My feelings for you...you may never feel the same way but I don't think I'll ever change the way I feel about you. I'm happy that I got to be with you. Thank you Kirito." Tears were falling uncontrollably at this point. I didn't want to leave him, I wanted to run to him and stay by his side but I couldn't. "'I'm happy that I got to be with you'? (Y/n) what's going on?" he asked. "I'm sorry Kirito. Goodbye." I smiled at him, tears continuing to fall. "I love you Kirito." and with that, I turned and ran home. Painful tears forging lines down my face as I thought about all my times with Kirito. His smile. His laugh. The way he always cheered me up. I truly do love him.

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Kirito's POV~

        I haven't heard from (y/n) in two days and I was hoping to talk to her in class today. Our first day back at school from the break. I needed to tell her how I felt. I needed to tell her and I needed her to understand the truth. She was the one I wanted to kiss on New Years. She was the one I had chosen. She was the one I loved.

        As I made my way into home room I glanced around the class room to see if (y/n) had come in yet. That was weird that she hadn't. She was always in here before me. I sat down and watched everyone enter through the door. (Y/n) was absent. Why did she have to be absent today? It would be lonely without her here.

         I was right. It wasn't the same without (y/n). I couldn't even focus today because she was all I could think about. I packed up my back pack and sighed as I slung it over my shoulder. I saw Asuna as I was exiting the school. "Hey Asuna, do you know why (y/n) isn't here today?" I asked. She looked at me confused, sadness was present too. Why? "Y-you didn't know? She didn't tell you? I thought you would be the first that she would tell." Asuna said. I thought back to what she was trying to tell me when Asuna met up with us. "What? What didn't she tell me?" I asked, eager to hear the answer.

         "(Y/n) moved away. Her dad got a new job and she had chosen to go with him, she had told me that she would choose on New Years. I-I still don't know why...She's going to a new school too...she said she would visit though." Asuna told me, trying to conceal the tears in her eyes. I just stood there, not knowing what to do next. (Y/n) moved? Was it because of me? Because Asuna and I kissed? Was that what she was basing it off of? If I kissed her or Asuna? She wouldn't be at school anymore. She wouldn't be there, by my side, everyday. To make me smile, laugh or to see her smile or laugh? I wouldn't be able to tell her how I feel? To tell her...that I love her. "(Y/n)..." I said, tears of my own silently falling to the ground.