Purple Midnight (TodoBakuDeku AU) ✔️

~*Eighth Chapter*~

*Major Cussing Warning*

"You do understand that this next mission doesn't require you to come, right Midoriya? If you're still shaken from what happened Monday, wouldn't it be preferable for you to stay here?" Todoroki double-checked with his green-haired friend, staring deeply into his sparkly-like, seafoam eyes.

"Yes, I do get that, Todoroki-kun. I just...need to learn how to suck it up someday, don't you agree?" Izuku shakily answered, his hands busy fidgeting and running through his thick curls as he spoke. True, he had many, many questions about the bodies, and the person he saw in the house, and yes, he did have a nightmare about the events that took place at the murderers' house every night since then, but he signed up to this school knowing he was going to kill people.

His career was now taking the lives of others for money; so why did he feel so many complicated emotions about the assassination, while also feeling extremely empty inside? Was he not made to kill? Yes, probably. But that didn't matter anymore, he had to kill, no matter what he thought, and no matter what he felt.

He was sure disregarding his own feelings so he could get the job done would bite him in the ass later on; but, just like everything else, that didn't matter. At least, not then.

Todoroki gave him a skeptical glance as he used his foot to nudge his friend, Kastuki, to move over a bit on his bed, since he was sitting in the middle of it. The three teammates were currently in Katsuki's bedroom, much to said male's complaints, making it seem as though that was now their hangout place. Unsurprisingly, in the blonde's opinion.

"Oh c'mon, Sho. Just let it go, the stupid nerd wants to torture himself by helping us out? Let him," Katsuki boisterously advised, earning a cold glare and a smack to the back of the head from Shoto.

Izuku clasped a hand over his mouth at their small exchange, trying to contain the giggles that were uncontrollably falling from his mouth, but failing supremely as soon as the dual-haired and ash-blonde haired boys started to get into a small argument about something that was completely off-track from the smaller boy.

Then he laughed. Izuku Midoriya, the sassy soon-to-be-assassin, in front of the two classmates he was desperately trying to keep a facade up around the most, laughed. And it wasn't some small chuckle that could easily be excused, no, it was a deep, hearty laugh that caused him to clutch the sides of his stomach as he doubled over. He could barely get any air in as his eyes watered and his face hurt from smiling so much.

His smile, oh his smile. It was wide and bright, capable of dispelling even the scariest of darknesses. It only lasted for a few moments, but it was all Katsuki and Shoto needed to stop getting at each other's throats for a few moments, and just simply look. Look upon the rare sight that they never knew they so hopelessly needed until that very moment.

What was it about that beautiful, shining smile that had the both of them instantly wrapped around Izuku's little finger in that moment? they wondered.

Izuku wiped the small tears that had shed while he had his laughing fit with his hand, and let his mesmerizing smile slowly fall from his face as he looked back and forth between Shoto and Katuki with curiosity and slight concern take over his features instead.

But only then, and only then, did he realize his mistake. He had let his guard down completely. He let emotions other than amusement, anger, and sass show, and he didn't hold back in the slightest. Izuku was internally starting to freak out, what if they didn't like his laugh or smile? What if letting a small percentage of his vulnerabilities through the wall he had built would backfire in the worst way possible for him?

He hated himself, oh how he hated himself within that moment. Because he had already let a big piece of him, the only pieces of joy he had managed to preserve and lock away, were put completely on display, and he knew he couldn't let his inner turmoil seep through the cracks that were inflicted on his well-built emotional block.