The Unresolved Dilemma

8.

26th May,2015

This is the worst day of my life. I had been trying so hard to not cry. But I can't stop my tears, they just roll off my eyes. The whole plan of taking Tanishka away from Aksh proved to be a fiasco. Why does it always happen to me? Why am I the only one to suffer? Why after so much efforts I can't get results? Just why me ?

Well it all started 10 days before. After the results of University were declared. Of course I and tanishka were happy because we made it through but Aksh was not in agreement with results. He wanted to get admission in the University but I didn't had option. I had to cut him loose. The minute he got the news,he called me and begged me for help. He knew my father's relation with the trustee. I tried to console him and also explained him the situation. I told him that I would try my best and talk to my father about this issue. But I never talked about it. I can't and I never wanted to. I was winning and I didn't want to take any step that might ruin it. The plan was executed as per the wish. After 2 to 3 days, Aksh got calm and stable. He decided to apply for admission in other University or college. We both went to the college to get the application form. He was shaking,for an instance he might broke into tears but he didn't. He was so calm and it literally scared me. I had never seen him this calm and poised. I tried to talk to him about the situation but he assured me that he was fine with the changes and he had accepted it. I was on seventh heaven inside but had to make a consoling face. After the submission of application form, he took me to our usual spot. He ordered the samosas and momos for both of us. It was a party from his side. I was astonished as how such transformation can occur in 3 days. The boy who was crying like a child whose ice cream fell off is so calm now. The boy who didn't eat for 2 days is suddenly throwing me a party. How could this happen? I started worrying because the change was not digestible. I knew him very well and the guy sitting in front of me was not him. I started getting negative thoughts. Maybe he knew about me,how I and Tanishka managed to get admission, maybe he knew all of it, maybe he is okay with all of this or may be he is planning something in his mind. All sorts of possible negative thoughts started bombarding one by one on my weak,tender and corruptible brain land. We continued to talk for another hour.  He was looking so different today. He talked about the topics that usually irritated him. I show danger sign ahead of me. It was more of a warning sign forcing me to tell him the truth about the conspiracy. But I waited, took a deep breath and let go off that emotion. I have never seen him in such a good mood. He was full of excitement and positivity. The dreadful hour came to an end. Finally we stood up and headed towards the home. On our way home, he took a minute to glance at some of the girly stuffs to gift Tanishka as a part of his admission. I was furious but couldn't say or act. He purchased a fine pair of earrings for her.

I remember the day when I brought her a pair of earrings which she denied to accept because she can't wear them at home . Even if she would how is she gonna answer her mom? This was her excuse to my gift. So I was curious to find out what will she say to Aksh's gift. To not miss this opportunity,I told Aksh that we directly go to Tanishka's house and give her the gift. Aksh agreed and we headed towards her house. She was playing badminton outside the house, she was both surprised and excited to see us. She was all the more happy to see Aksh out of his trauma state . She came to us and we all talked about the admission and our future and all sorts of meaningless talks. While we were on subject of gifts,I reminded Aksh to give Tanishka hid gift. Aksh took out the nicely packed, shinning box from the pocket and gave it to her. She was so happy,she gave him a tight hug. She liked the earrings and even complimented it saying and I quote,"You sure got some good taste". And she winked at him. What was going on? I gifted her a much better pair of earrings and she rejected me like a bill from opposition party. This got me so furious that I was almost about to slap her. And what was with the wink? Why did she wink at him and gave such dirty smile? Is she cheating on me? Or is it just me? I just smiled and we both departed towards our home. But thoughts had stucked in my head. I wanted to clear my doubts.  I reached home and sat for the dinner . Had a nice dinner and after that I really had a useful talk with my dad. As we were talking I got a notification on Facebook. Tanishka has recently updated her Facebook status. Her status read she was in relationship.  And the tagged person was Aksh. Aksh was her boyfriend. So what was I ? Was I just a fling? Was I just for time pass? Whatever happened between us till now was a mere joke. I wanted to ask her all of this at once. So I called her immediately. She picked up the phone and as soon as she spoke, her words melted my anger. But I was still mad at her so I asked all the questions without even stopping for a bit. When I turned silent I heard her laughing and crackling. She stopped after few minutes and told me that it was a dare. Aksh had given her a dare and if she completes Aksh is gonna post half naked photo on Facebook. I still didn't understood what was happening . Also I didn't believe her either,from her actions it was very much in agreement to my blame. But anyhow I accepted and thought it might be true,maybe it was some fucking childish dare. They both are fucking childish assholes!

A shocking news struck me after 3 days of meeting with Aksh. New rules have been declared and that there will be new admissions based on the new implemented system. A letter from the government came, directing the universities to admit students on merit base and not on their own. This news hit me in the morning. And the behaviour of Aksh made all the more clear meaning. He was the one who knew this would happen. And that's the reason he was so happy to get admission in any college. I woke up from bed,completed the routine and sat down to read the whole article. It said that someone filed a PIL against the activities of different universities and injustice they were doing to students. This was filed 2 years back and the judgement came today. Yes, the judgement which was on hold for more than a year came today to basically fuck up my plan. My whole plan of cutting Aksh from the path was now a major upset. My palace of happiness was now in pieces. I was devastated but someone was a little more happy today,Aksh. He had came to my home to give us a box of Kajukatri . I congratulated him and showed him concern that I was happy he will be with us again.

The procedures were completed and the result was displayed on the college notice board. And the name of Aksh was right there staring at me, smirking and giving a triump cunning smile to me. I tried to act normal . But there was this,' I don't like you coming to college' look on my face. I wanted to look normal but I wasn't able to so I rather talk less to them. We were sitting in the canteen. Me and tanishka on one side and Aksh on the other side. We ordered some samosas and chai for us. It was our rule whenever we would celebrate something we would eat samosas with chai. There we were enjoying our samosas, talking about how we would enjoy our college and stuff. At that time,my eyes fell on two figures approaching us from distant.  The make figure was well built,wheatish but looked damn smart. The female figure was averagely heighted, a combination of cuteness and hotness. Everyone in the canteen were looking at them. It looked as if two humans were walking in paradise of Aliens. They were approaching towards us. Their speed getting slower after each step untill finally it stopped. They were standing right against us.