Take It Back - Bucky x Reader

The Morning After

[ After all, what if he only loved you so much and not enough?]

It had been years ago, but it couldn't be broken.

With slight hesitation and a convincing stature, you had looked at yourself dead in the eye.

Your hands wrapped around the edge of the dingy cold sink, gripping it tightly in order to control your anger. Your eyes were bloodshot and your knuckles white, matching the walls of the old bathroom. The drain was dark and hollow, its inner piece missing since around the time your were ten years old. Around the drain were splatters of orange and ugly brown, it spread outwards towards the inner ends of the sink, the rust making itself a part of the porcelain.

In your reflection, your tired eyes had drifted down to your lips then slowly down the middle of your chest where a gold chain hung loosely, a little round pearl hanging off the end of it. Your trembling right hand had gone to the pearl and making your neck as stiff as possible and with a grunt you had pulled the small chain off your body. You felt the soft burning on the back on your neck where the necklace had dented into your skin, but you didn't care.

It hadn't hurt as much as your heart did.

Opening your hand, slowly your fingers unraveled from around the jewelry.

You felt sad and immense sorrow as you looked at it - the necklace laid broken in your hand, it's frayed ends falling off the sides of your palm.

You made a cup with your hand and tilted it in the same angle as the sink. You watched in awe as it slid down the gaping hole of the drain, gone forever.

That was when you had made a promise to that you would never love someone ever again.

It had killed you when you discovered it. You didn't expect your guard to have fallen, and you hadn't expected it to be with him of all people.

Your chest grew heavy with dread months ago when the realization that you'd broken that promise had hit you. It had happened again.

You thought you had been convincing enough to not fall for another man, at least not in such an irresponsible way.

To your dismay, of course you hadn't convinced yourself and you had allowed yourself to fall in love again and this time it was stronger than it had ever been in your entire life.

You were not prepared for any of this. None of this was even supposed to happen. It wasn't like it was with Eddie or Brock where you had purposely looked for them and with the purpose of a non-platonic relationship.

Bucky had been different.

Bucky was your best friend. He was your sister's fiancé.

It was a mistake.

You felt like an awful person for putting him in this situation. Coming between a man and a woman's love? That was not you.

Except that it was. You had become this other person.