Songs from the heart

pessimistic

Verse1:

I never really understood
What made me think the things I would
I always called it self-defense
Prepared myself to face the worst
It was controlled and caluclated
The safety net that I created
No attack could take me by surprise

But then this person comes around
They burst my bubble and they dont even ask
And then one more appears
They're on a hunt against my fears
But I dont know how to behave
Cause I'm not used to being saved
I act oblivious, play it cool
They say

Prechorus1:

"You see the glass half empty, even when it's full
Who are you tryna fool?"

Chorus1:

But I'm not pessimistic
Surviving in this cruel world has made me realistic
So blame it on society and let me be another soul that had nothing to say
Against the crowds of all the souls
that cheered to see me fail

Verse2:

And there's one dark day from my past
That keeps me up every few nights
Finding the root should bring relief
But I dont know what to believe
It was controlled and calculated
When did I get so overwhelmed?
Can I put trust in my own thoughts again?

And then this person sticks around
For a split second I dont even question why
They tend to reappear
My heart is racing when they're near
And I dont know how to behave
Cause this explosion feels too great
I act untouched, I play it cool
They say

Prechorus2:

"Yours eyes light up like diamonds everytime you laugh
You dont need to try so hard"

Chorus2:

So maybe I'm pessimistic
But have you seen the world we live in,
let's be realistic
And I don't mind to take the blame,
but how can I allow myself
to dream of being heard
I don't want the stage
What if they see me fail?

Chorus3:

And I'm not daydreaming
I'll die before I make another quick scenario
Before my expectations blow up in my face again
This is just wishful thinking
And maybe they're not here to stay
And maybe it won't be long before they see me as I am and walk away
And I know more than anyone that they can never fix me
I've lived in this cozy, alienating mess for quite some time
And I don't mind, oh I don't mind
But could you take me on your ride?
For once?