have it all (l.h)

"you can always start a new puzzle"

"He's leaving in two weeks," I reminded her and she shrugged her shoulders nonchalantly.

"Long distance exists. We think it's worth it to at least try," she said, in good spirits. For some reason, I had completely forgotten that people willingly committed to long distance relationships. I hadn't even considered something like that with Luke. "I mean, we definitely haven't had a huge conversation about it. We both just sort of realized that we enjoy each other so much that we'd like to stay an item for as long as we can."

"And you trust that he'll commit to that?"

"Jo, you have to work on trusting and committing," Emma said with a sigh as she turned away to walk to the coffee I had made her. "I really like Ashton and he seems to really like me, so I'm willing to put the effort in. I like the idea of getting cute goodnight texts for a couple of months. And if he ends up sucking at that, I'll drop him." I let out a quiet laugh and tried to see Emma's point of view, but I just couldn't agree with her perspective. "What's going on with you and Luke?"

"A lot." I sighed as I thought back to the night before and I crossed to my desk to take a seat. "Let's just say that this stupid tour is the only thing keeping us from taking things further." Emma looked over at me abruptly and I bit my lip gently.

"Please elaborate."

"We both want something more, I guess. And we had been on the same page about stalling any progressions! But now he seems to want something now, which I can't agree to."

"Why?" Emma asked, seeming frustrated with me. "Jo, you have a much deeper connection with Luke than I have with Ashton—but the tour's not stopping me, so why let it stop you?"

"I don't want the first time my relationship lasts longer than a month to be ruined by long distance, Em. I won't let it." Emma bit her lip as she walked up to me and I sighed as I crossed my arms. "If we genuinely like each other—for all the right reasons—then we'll still have feelings for each other once he's back."

"That's a long time, Jo," Emma reminded me, which didn't make me feel any better. "I don't mean to be a downer, but don't you think there'd be more effort to stay in touch if you guys were building a relationship? What if one of you just gives up, even on a friendship?"

"If one of us gives up on a friendship because of distance, how could we possibly make it as more?" As I looked into Emma's eyes, I could tell she had finally understood where I was coming from—even if she didn't agree with me for her own personal situation, she couldn't argue with me. "It wouldn't be fair to either one of us to start a relationship just to be missing each other all the time. I'm rooting for you and Ashton, completely, but I just don't want that for myself. I've barely been in a real relationship, so I don't want to be in a long distance one."

"I get it," Emma told me with a sad smile on her face. "Can I say one more thing before I switch to fully supporting your decision?" I laughed quietly but nodded at Emma to give her the go ahead.

"Just because something seems hard, or because there's an obstacle in your way, doesn't mean the answer is to give up on it. Especially when it could be something great. I agree that long distance relationships aren't ideal—more so since you actually feel like you and Luke could have something, unlike your past relationships. But while I understand, I guess I personally think that gives you all the more reason to just go for it." I bit my lip once Emma was finished talking and almost wished I had told her not to give her two cents—because I was scared I agreed with her.