c h a p t e r. 42

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"Monsters cannot be announced. One cannot say: 'Here are our monsters,' without immediately turning the monsters into pets."
― Jacques Derrida

chapter 42

Bar and Clementine indulged themselves into make-up sex, cuddled for a little, switched out the dirty sheets for clean ones, then went back to bed, their hair still wet from the shower they just shared.

They were both laying together, her lazily resting on top of him, both of them naked and pressed against one another, skin against skin.

They were warm and more relaxed than they had been for the entire last month.

Being together-- it felt like breathing fresh air after drowning in murky, dark water for years.

Slowly, as the hours drew on after they got back together, they got more comfortable with one another and became more than clingy-- missing the other way too much to bear the thought of being apart.

Which was good, because neither Bar or the little goddess seemed to be letting go of the other any time soon.

The brute ran his fingers down Clementine's spine, slowly tracing a path back up, pressed a kiss onto her hair.

The little goddess in return placed soft kisses onto Bar's face and lips, her own fingers playing with his hair.

Affectionately, they were soaking up as much attention as they could get.

"Hey, Oly?" Clementine murmured, cuddling closer.

"Yes, babygirl?" Bar kisses her forehead.

"I feel really bad," She says, voice barely above a whisper. "I don't know how you can, how you can forgive me for what happened, I don't know why you e-even want me. Your father... I didn't, I didn't know what h-he did to you-- I would've never, I-I shouldn't have assumed that you fought just because like everyone else. I'm sorry, I'm so sorry for everything I put you through Oly, you didn't deserve it."

"Thank you for the apology but Baby... I don't need one," Bar said, pulling the little goddess to straddle him so they were face to face. "I want you because I know how kind you are. Because I know despite how fucking cute you look, you're this fierce little thing. I want you because I know that you gave the guy who drugged me two black eyes even though you hate violence. I want you because in the face of everything, after you have been hurt so much by me and by the world, you remain kind. I want you because even after the seven years I spent bullying you, you still want me."

Clementine hiccuped and Bar wiped the tears that had started to pour out of her eyes, voice going softer.

"We've hurt each other a lot, more than most couples do." He told her. "And that makes us... that makes us liable to hurt ourselves too, that makes us worry, and feel insecure. But it also makes us love and care and protect each other all the more."

"You're r-right," The little goddess nodded. "I love you so much that I feel like I'm going to fall into pieces m-most days and even if you forgave me, there's not enough apologizes that I, I can tell you to make up for everything that happened."

"We need to learn how to forgive ourselves," Bar smiled up at her, and Clementine let out a little giggle, nodding along.

"Yeah, we do. And how to love ourselves without, without it relying on t-the other."

"Add it to the rules?"

"Unconditional self-love and forgiveness?"

"Mhm."

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