The Orville Shorts: Vol. 2

Poe

(Claire writes a letter to her first and last love.)

Dear Poe, 

You know I've never been good with words or expressing my feelings. Yet, I'll try. I do owe you that much. 

Almost eight years ago we entered this together, and we both knew that once we dived into it, there was no backing out. How can you return to friends once you've crossed the threshold of lovers? You can't. I'm not saying I regretted "us", that's far from the truth. Yet, there are plenty of other things I regret. I regret not offering you that cat. I regret not moving in with you when you asked me. I regret getting so drunk that I can't remember the first time I slurred: "I love you..." I regret not making "you and I" into an "us" as early as possible. Mostly I regret not being able to help you, not being able to stop you. 

I wish we could talk calmly, yet I know you won't. Contrary to what I used to say when deciding to have that second child: Ty or not. If I chose either decisions it will kill me inside. Either way, I'm still without you. Once I have my second child, I'll never be the "old me". 

I'm leaving, I can't stay here when you're not really with me. You won't let me help you and I can't sit around and watch you deuterate, becoming someone foreign to me. It's already ruined me and I don't think I'll be able to love someone as wholly as I loved you. It's time to let you go, for my own sake and my children's well being. I dearly hope this helps you too. I hope this acts as a wake up call. Please, do me one last favor and quit. Do it for me and you. Do it for "us" and this future child. If you ever wake up, I hope you forgive me and try to find me again. I understand if you ever don't. 

You were my first love and probably be my last. I'll miss you always and love you until I die. 

Sincerely, 

Claire Finn 

(A/N: I wanted to write about Finn's past. I don't think I handled it very well. This was way before Isaac came into the picture and way before she joined on The Orville. This was during and maybe a little bit before Ty was born. Poe was a lover and someone she felt connected to, and thought she would never love again.)