LOCKDOWN

Chapter 20

I woke up alone. I didn't know whether I was expecting to wake up wrapped in Peyton's arms or not, but I was still disappointed. Our reunion last night had been indescribable; there were absolutely no words that could explain how I had felt when she had pressed her lips to mine.

We hadn't discussed it for the rest of the night, instead lying next to each other and watching a movie. She fell asleep about half way through, her soft breaths barely audible due to the movie we were watching. I couldn't help but admire her sleeping form. She looked so peaceful, a small smile etched on her face as she slept. I felt that last night was definitely a turning point for both of us, so waking up alone definitely stung.

So many questions were racing through. What had last night meant to Peyton? Better yet, what had last night meant to me? The days leading up to Peyton leaving were tense and filled with anxiety, on my part at least, anyway. We had almost kissed, and then she had accused me of playing games with her sexuality, which wasn't the case at all. The truth was, I was confused about my sexuality, but I wasn't confused about her. I knew that my attraction towards Peyton was growing stronger and stronger by the day and had reached its peak three nights ago when we had sat on the lounge and almost kissed.

There was no question that I was extremely physically attracted to Peyton. She stirred feelings inside of me that I had never felt before. But did I have romantic feelings for her? I had never had feelings for anyone before so I didn't have anything to compare it to. All I knew was that her smile made me smile, her laugh made me laugh, her happiness brought me happiness, and the thought of her leaving me again made me want to hold onto her and never let go.

I unravelled myself from the blanket and got off the couch, walking upstairs to see if Peyton had retreated back to her bedroom. Her room was empty, as was the bathroom, so I knew there was only one other place she could be. I made my way out onto the back verandah and watched as Peyton rolled around on the grass with Dennis, tugging on the rope he had clasped tightly between his teeth. Her laugh sent shivers down my spine and I couldn't help but smile as I watched the two interact.

"C'mon, dude. Just drop the rope," she said, pulling at the rope.

She hadn't expected him to let go, and as she pulled with all her might, Dennis had loosened his grip. Peyton went flying to the floor and I couldn't help but laugh at the sight.

"You did ask him to let go," I chuckled, which caught her attention.

Even from metres away, I could see the flush on her cheeks as she stood up, brushing off her pants as she did so. She laughed somewhat nervously as she walked towards me, leaning against the verandah railing.

"How'd you sleep?" she asked, wiping sweat from her forehead.

The simple question shouldn't have illicit such deep thoughts, but it did. The truth was, although it was an uncomfortable couch, although we fell asleep with the TV on, and although I had had the worst day ever, I slept the best I've ever slept in my life. I couldn't figure out why, the only solution being that Peyton was right next to me.

"Uh," I cleared my throat awkwardly, "yeah, good. I slept good. You?"

"Yeah," she ran her hand through her hair, looking down at the floor awkwardly. "Yeah, I slept well."

"Did you...uh, did you stay on the couch? Or did you go up to your bed?" I asked pathetically, refusing you meet her gaze and staring at the ground.

She seemed to find the ground equally as interesting as I did. She shuffled awkwardly from one foot to the other, before finally saying, "I stayed. I just woke up early to let Dennis out."