LOCKDOWN

Chapter 15

She didn't reply. She didn't even move, her back still facing me. I took a deep breath, willing myself to continue even though I could feel myself digging a deeper hole than there already was to begin with. She turned around slowly, and I took in her appearance. She wore another khaki shirt and tracksuit pants, which hung low on her hips. The waistband of her underwear could be seen, as could the bottom of her toned stomach. My eyes trailed up to her chest, and I gulped loudly when I noticed that she wasn't wearing a bra. Her hardened nipples were poking against the fabric and I had an overwhelming and insatiable urge to reach out, to touch her. I ripped my gaze from her chest just in time to see her start towards me, gripping the back of my neck and pulling my face close to hers.

Once again, her hot breath fanned over my lips. She smelt of mint toothpaste and men's cologne. Her eyes were dark, her pupils almost entirely covering her iris'. Her cheeks were flushed pink and her skin was hot against mine.

"Do you want me to kiss you?" she growled roughly.

I don't know what I was expecting her to say, but it wasn't that. Her eyes never left mine and her grip tightened on the skin of my neck. My brain was telling me I should've been scared, but my body wasn't reacting that way. Instead, desire flooded my body, pulsating through my veins and throbbing between my legs.

"I —" I stammered, and she pulled me closer still, our lips brushing with every word she spoke.

"Do you want me to fuck you?" she whispered gruffly. "Is that what you want?"

I gulped audibly. I couldn't move even if I wanted to, and I certainly couldn't speak - and even if I could, what would I say? I'd be lying if I said no, but would saying yes be truthful? Her grip was still tightening, and yet it wasn't painful. She suddenly let me go as quickly as she had grabbed me, taking a step away and dropping her hands to her sides.

"I'm not going to be some little experiment for you," she snarled, turning her back on me once again. "I'm not going to be led on and then turned down once you've realised you're not into girls. My sexuality isn't a game!"

I was stunned into silence, shocked that Peyton would actually believe that was something I would do. Not only that, I felt as if I was uncovering tiny cracks in Peyton's touch facade. Had Peyton been through this with someone else before, only to let them in and get her heart broken?

"I — I wouldn't do that," I whispered.

I heard her scoff loudly. Where did this attitude come from? Where was the Peyton that had comforted me while I cried yesterday? Where was the Peyton that was paramount on proving herself to me?

"I wouldn't," I repeated.

"Can you leave?"

I thought about persisting, forcing her to listen to what I had to say, but I knew better than to do that. I nodded slowly and walked out of her room, closing the door softly behind me. No matter what I tried, nothing would take my mind off of Peyton. I tried everything - exercising with Dennis, watching Netflix, playing video games, having a bath, FaceTiming the girls, even watching the horrible news updates on ENOV-18. Nothing worked. Peyton was still lingering on my mind and I couldn't stop it.

"Where's Mitchell?" Aspen had asked while we FaceTimed.

"She's in the spare room." I didn't elaborate further, hoping that my brief response would indicate that I didn't want to talk about her.

"Is she still being decent to you?" Esther had enquired, and I nodded in reply.

"Oi, Zara!" I heard Timmy yell, followed by him emerging onto the screen next to Nora. She swatted him away, but he just poked out his tongue and continued talking.

"Tell Peyton to answer her phone, she hasn't texted me back all day!" he said.

"Yeah, okay. I'll let her know," I promised him, and he gave me a head nod before walking out of view.

"I love him, but he's driving me crazy!" Nora complained, followed by Timmy's "I heard that!" in the background.

The night drew on and I knew I'd have to speak to Peyton sooner or later, not only to pass on Timmy's message, but to clear the air after what had gone down in her room earlier in the day. At 6:30pm I decided to make us some dinner, microwaving some packaged frozen meals that the army had delivered. I ate mine alone, and after feeding Dennis I brought up the food I had made for Peyton. I knocked gently on the door, nerves flooding my body as I heard her footsteps approach.

She swung the door open and looked at me, expecting me to say something.

"Oh, um...I made you dinner," I said awkwardly, holding out the plastic container.

"Thanks," she said, taking it from me and placing it on the desk next to the door.

"Also, Timmy asked me to tell you to answer his texts," I relayed the message.

"You spoke to Timmy?" she asked. Her jaw clenched noticeably, and even in my timid state I could appreciate the sharp line of her jaw.

"Just briefly. I was on the phone with Nora and he just asked me to tell you that," I explained quickly, not wanting another repeat episode of her telling me to stay out of her business.

"Right. Okay," she nodded. "Thanks for dinner."

She closed the door, leaving me standing outside wondering where it had all gone wrong. I spent the night in the exact same way as I had the night before, curled up on the shower floor, letting the water run over me and mix with my tears as they fell to the tiled floor. Things had been going so well between us, so what had changed?

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AUTHORS NOTE
Sorry this chapter is a bit shorter than my previous ones! I didn't want to fill it with unnecessary fillers. Sometimes I find that even if a story is really well written, I get bored of it's too full of words just to get the word count up - that could just be me though. Are you all happy with the length of my chapters? I try to keep them around 2000 words each, but today's fell short around 1650!

Anyway, I hope you're all doing well and staying safe. What's the lockdown situation like where you all live? Restrictions are easing in Australia and we are now allowed to have up to 5 guests at our homes. The hospital I'm in is remaining on lockdown though. Stay safe everyone and don't forget to vote and let me know your thoughts on the chapter! x

PS. Thoughts on the new Wattpad dark mode? I'm unsure about it still!