Chrysanthemums

Chapter 28

'Get off me, please get off me, I didn't mean it–'

'No, you said something to me. Go ahead. I'm your husband, you can tell me anything,' he said, holding his arms behind his back, head over the full sink.

'I didn't mean i–' He shoved his head under the water, making him inhale water. When he pulled him back up, he went into a coughing fit, trying to clear his lungs.

'Papa?' a voice called from upstairs.

He shoved his head back under the water. "Everything's fine, sweetheart! Be a good girl and stay in your room, okay?'

'Okay, Daddy!'

He pulled him back up. 'Stop being so fucking loud,' he hissed. 'You want her to see you like this?'

'No,' he whispered, voice hoarse. 'I'm sorry. I made a comment about you drinking, I shouldn't have, I didn't mean it. You handle your liquor fine.'

'Thank you.' He dropped him onto the kitchen floor, picking up his beer bottle and walking away.

Blaine woke up feeling anxious. He opened his drawer and grabbed his lighter and one of the white cylinders, going outside. He didn't know how Kurt felt about smoking, and he didn't want Tracy to ever be around the smoke.

It's why he did it at times like now, when no one was awake.

He sat by the back door, lighting the end of it. One breath and he already felt better, so he held it in his hand, letting it burn, waiting to see if the feel would come back.

He had been addicted, but he had worked on cutting down, and now it was just the quickest way to calm down but he didn't need to. He was careful to only take a breath or two, only as much as he needed before putting it out and throwing it away.

He still seemed calm, so he waited, keeping it lit. Eventually he just put it out, even though there was hardly anything left to put out. He threw it away, immediately throwing his clothes in the wash and showering to get the scent off of him.